fandomhigh | Childcare for Idiots, Thursday

Childcare for Idiots, Thursday

No very special guests in class this week it would appear. Because Deadpool was too awesome to need another team up.

"Today we're gonna talk about something that happens with all kids," Deadpool said, arms crossed over his chest like this was totally serious business. "Unless they're overly precocious little monsters that are biding their time, lulling you into a false sense of security before they stab you to death while you sleep."

Wasn't he just cheery?

"I'm talking, of course, about temper tantrums."

Clearly!

"They can happen for any number of reasons," he continued. "They're sleepy, they're bored, they feel like pushing boundaries today, or just because they wanna. Children are insidious and less predictable than me. And that's sayin' something."

Luckily Jan was busy pretending to read a book about gay, gay penguins and had nothing to contribute to this class as an example. Or maybe she was biding her time. God help us all.

"So, how do you respond?" Deadpool asked. "Not like a bitch ass parents on those stupid Nanny 911 shows, that's for sure. God, I hate them with every fiber of my being. So, I wanna hear what you think should be done when dealing with a tantrum. Get into groups of two and discuss. Just remember that logic and reason ate useless with kids. Useless, I say!"

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It was fairly safe to say that Jim had never dealt with a temper tantrum in his life.

... With the possible exception of his own, but those totally didn't count.

Still, he was willing to toss around ideas. That had to mean something, he figured, as he looked around for a partner.

"What can't you just give them what they want?" asked the youngest of six.

"It would quiet them down pretty quick, right?" agreed the only child. "My mom used to give in pretty easily when I wanted something, anyhow. I just had to bust out the sad little kid eyes."

They held power.

"But if I was ever having an actual tantrum, she'd say no, on the grounds that if she gave in for one screaming fit, I'd start to figure that was the right way to go about getting anything that I wanted."

Breaking the law worked so much better, anyhow!

"Well, perhaps," Rilla said. "I never really kicked my heels and yelled over things."

She just dropped cakes into brooks.

"I wasn't too bad when I was little," Jim replied, grinning. "But I think maybe my mom was always a bit of a pushover. I can barely remember all of the pets that I got away with bringing home over the years."

Most of which had tentacles and extra eyes, and so on.

"Oh, I lost track of how many kittens we had running around Ingleside," Rilla laughed.

"And no tantrums required?" Jim had to check, yeah. But he was doing so with a laugh. "I think a kitten is probably one of those things I haven't had."

He would have remembered. They didn't really have them back home.

"Well, I had to wheedle a bit if it was to live inside the house," Rilla admitted. "Were you more a dog person?"

"I was an anything person," Jim chuckled, "but I don't think I've had a dog, either."

He wasn't entirely certain he knew what a dog was. At least not in the pet sense. Dr. Doppler was certainly fairly canine, himself, but astrophysicists didn't tend to make good housepets.

"I've probably had a lot of weird pets you've never heard of, though."

"Oh, I won't be shocked," Rilla said. "My friend Carl from home is a friend to all the tiny beasts. He slept with a frog in his bed for years."

"Yeah, that sounds like me," Jim replied with a laugh. "There might have been a few tantrums when Mom tried to get the more slimy of my pets out of the bed, though."

See! He was willing to admit it!

"How slimy were they?" Rilla asked.

"They got progressively less slimy as I got older," Jim offered. "That has to count for something, right?"

Sure it did! It totally didn't answer her question. But it counted for something.

"Did they also get larger?" Rilla checked.

"Well, once I got better at the big sad kid eyes, I didn't have to sneak them into the inn anymore," Jim laughed. "So of course I could get away with bigger pets over the years."

Plus he could carry larger animals home when he got bigger. There were plenty of factors contributing to the bigger, less slimy things!

Rilla giggled. "You lived in an inn?"

"It's my mom's," Jim explained, still smiling. "We've been there as far back as I can remember, so being here is kind of weird. Not bad. Just... weird."

"I've lived in the same house all my life," Rilla said, "until I came here too, so I understand."

"Any other kids where you were from? I kind of have to admit that I don't have any experience," Jim noted. "There were a few children who came into the inn with their parents now and then, but none I ever really had to take care of, never mind dealing with their tantrums."

"I'm the youngest of six," Rilla said with a little smile. "There were always children in our house."

"So you have way more experience than I do," Jim decided, chuckling again. "Did you see plenty of tantrums? Or at least plenty of kittens being sneaked into the house?"

"There were a few tantrums," Rilla admitted. "And more than a few spankings."

"Which probably didn't make things much quieter," Jim wagered, "but I can imagine it got the point across that tantrums didn't lead to anywhere good."

"I was only spanked once," Rilla said. "It was not an experience I wanted repeated."

"And spankings never really turned me off," Jim noted, grinning lopsidedly, and maybe just a bit sheepishly. "I guess maybe I'm just a sucker for punishment."

Hence all the trouble he'd been getting into with the cops.

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions

Re: Discuss Reactions