fandomhigh | Paranormal Activity 101, Tuesday, January 25th

Alaric seemed to be in a better mood this week thanks to the fact that his apartment had heat again and he didn't have to trudge through like a foot of snow to get here. The good mood translated into Alaric preparing a long lecture and a stupid-ass activity that would give him great joy to watch people try to pull off. He asked the students to meet him in the Danger Shop, which had been transformed into a pretty large graveyard with a section closed off for desks and a chalkboard since there were notes to be taken before they got to the dirty work.

And there would be dirty work today.

"Okay, due to popular demand, this week we will be covering ghosts. They're not something I'm personally experienced with, but there have been mentions of ghosts and things ghost-like since before the ancient Greeks so I'm inclined to believe that their existence is pretty legitimate." Of course after Mystic Falls he was liable to believe in anything. "A ghost is typically defined as the soul or spirit of the deceased that can manifest itself in various ways, both visible and non-visible. Reasons for their existence varies. In a lot of Greek mythology, ghosts often provided warnings for people. Nowadays you often see movies where angry ghosts are around to get revenge for their deaths. A popular form of this are ghosts known as White Ladies, who stick around because they want revenge against their lover who betrayed them. There's a bunch of reasons for a spirit not to move on to whatever afterlife there is out there."

Alaric launched into a deeper discussion of ghosts, their history across different parts of the world, where they were likely to be found and on the different types of ghosts one might encounter. He was quick to explain that not all ghosts wanted to hurt people, and that some were there to warn others of something and some just didn't realize they were dead. He then got into ways to detect ghosts, namely through EMT meters, witches and psychics. Then, finally, he got into how to get rid of a ghost if you needed to. Iron was known to get them to dissipate for a short period of time, and that finding, salting and burning the bones was always a good way to get rid of a ghost permanently.

"Okay, so, today we're gonna do something that I hope you won't ever have to do in the future, but will definitely count as your exercise for the day," Alaric said, smiling like the evil jerk he was. "I want you all to grab a shovel, some salt, gasoline and a lighter. Then I want you all to dig up one of those graves and salt and burn the bones in there."

Honestly, this was completely unnecessary and he knew it. He just didn't much care. "Don't worry; they're fake bones and there won't be any gross corpses to look at or smell. I apologize in advance if your clothes get dirty."

He so didn't care.

[OCD up]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Do you have acid on you? 'Cause I'm thinking we're kinda limited on supplies."

"Next week, I'm bringing supplies from Chemistry. Whatever they are. They'd have to be useful." Why hadn't she grabbed baking soda and vinegar on her way out of class?

"Well, we've got . . . matches, salt, and accelarant."

"The salt would actually stop it from burning as hot." Scully's shovel hit something with a 'clack'. "Coffin?"

"Maybe that's why you need the salt, then. Give it a good, slow roasting."

Scully sat back on her heels, brushing soil off the surface of the coffin. "That is just disturbing." She paused. "Well, this whole thing would be disturbing if this weren't the Danger Shop."

"It's kinda disturbing even in the Danger Shop."

"It seems supremely disrespectful," Scully admitted, hand going up to the cross around her neck. "Although a ghost would seem to indicate that the last rites and funeral didn't -- do what they're supposed to."

Claudia didn't really know anything about last rites. "Or maybe they just weren't enough."

"Even more disturbing." Scully finished brushing dirt off the top half of the coffin, and braced her shovel to open the top. "I'm glad this is guaranteed not to smell."

Claudia's nose wrinkled as she set her shovel aside to ready the salt and lighter fluid. "Oh geez, yeah."

"Remind me to bring menthol, too, if we get near any real dead bodies," Scully said absently, then grunted. "Think this'll need both of us to open it."

"Can't you just --" Claudia made an emphatic, if vague, gesture with the salt. "Smash it?"

Scully rolled her eyes, huffed, then grit her teeth, and put all her weight on the closure. With a splintering of wood and a pop of air, the lid swung upward.

"Oh, lovely." She tilted her head. "Definitely need the lighter fluid. It's not dry enough to burn on its own."

Claudia peered in. "Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew. I kinda liked letting myself think people are people and then smiley bones."

"I won't go through the degradation and disintegration processes, then." She stepped back so Claudia could get to it with the lighter fluid. "I may want to be cremated now."

"Totally going for cremation," Claudia agreed. "Who the heck decided this was dignified?"

She used to know this. But she couldn't remember any more. "I'll have to look that up...." Scully shivered. "Organ donation. Cremation. Done. Got the lighter?"

Claudia flipped a pack of matches to her. "Way more disposable. And environmentally friendly!"

Smirking, Scully caught them, ripped a match off and lit it, watching the glow for a second. Then paused. "Salt!" She blew out the match, then grabbed the salt and sprinkled it in the coffin too. "Although who knows if that will even show a result here..." She ripped off another match, and threw it in.

Whooofsh!

Claudia grinned. "That's pretty much the only one that matters right now. It's not like there's any danger shoppy ghosts hanging around."

"I think the tradition is to go to a bar after this," Scully said, then paused. "But drinking is bad. At least when it's us, near graves. I vote for mochas." She waved the smoke away.

"Only when we've been drunk dialing Mulder," Claudia pointed out. "But, yeah, okay."

Paranormal Activity 101, Tuesday, January 25th

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