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Dogma: Fuck It! | Wednesday | Period 1

Even though he'd taught a few times before, it always gave Loki a little thrill when they let him keep teaching. And when his class for this summer had been approved, he'd been on cloud fucking nine. So, he was there, feet up on his desk while he waited for the students to file in and take their seats. Once they did, Loki finally stood up and looked at them for a few moments. Then, he climbed up onto his desk, smirked once, and screamed. Loud. And for a long time.

Sorry kids, you all get to deal with a nearly insane angel for a few fucking weeks. Hope you enjoy it. At least he stopped screaming before climbing down to just lean against the desk.

"Well, now that we're all fucking awake, we can start," he said cheerfully. "If you don't know it already, my name's Loki and you're in Dogma: Fuck It! This class is going to be easy enough so, if I hear you whining, expect me to get in your fucking face about it. If you're here, you wanted to take a class that's goes against your principle and your systems of beliefs. You wanted to learn how to break the fucking rules and have fun without always playing the goody fucking two shoes. Some of you might already know how to do that and just wanted a fun class for the summer. You found the right place. Some of you probably don't know how to do that and need to learn. You found the right place too."

And Loki was such an effective and helpful teacher. Really. Always willing to stay after class and help out when he was needed. Really.

"First class, we're supposed to do introductions right? Names and all that kind of shit?" Loki shook his head. "Fuck that noise. I probably know all your names and, if I don't, I'll fucking learn them. I've got a course roster for a reason. If I call you the wrong name, you'll just have to deal with it. Or set me straight. Don't be fucking meek, people. It's annoying."

Such a good teacher. Of course, he hadn't had any complaints before so he actually did think he was a fucking awesome teacher.

"This week, we're blowing off the fucking rules," Loki said. "Why do you think I screamed? Because I so desperately wanted your attention on me? Fuck that, I could care less. If you're smart, you'll pay attention. Why do you think this week's assignment to break a fucking rule right here and now? I don't care what rule, where it came from, who made it. Tell me the rule and then fucking break it. Break it knowing you won't get in trouble, get detention, get stinkeyed or anything like that. Break it and enjoy how fucking good it feels. Easy start to the class, right? It's only gonna get better from here."

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"Why are we breaking rules?" she asked mildly. She wasn't not going to do it. She just wanted to know why, first.

"Because it's Wednesday," he said dryly.

She eyed him, and got up out of her seat and walked to the blackboard.

She wrote DO YOU KISS YOUR MOTHER WITH THAT MOUTH? I THINK I'M IN THIS CLASS BY MISTAKE. and sat down.

"Only teachers are allowed to write on the board, right?"

"That's kind of a weak ass rule but I'm getting the feeling you're a goody two shoes," Loki said, snickering at that. "And I haven't got a fucking mom and I wouldn't kiss her anyway. I don't think you're in this class by mistake, not if you're scared of rule breaking."

"I'm not scared," she replied, narrowing her eyes. "I just don't see the reason behind doing it, just 'cause some foul-mouthed screaming guy tells me to. If I'm gonna break a rule, it's going to be for a good reason -- not because you and your limited vocabulary said to."

"Break a fucking rule because it's fun," he said, shaking his head. "What is it with this school and it's dweebs?"

Sorry, Sookie. Loki smirked though and fixed her with a look, clearly wondering if those dweeb qualities carried to other areas.

"I'm not a dweeb," she said, shaking her head. "I mean, the rules are in place for a reason. Stop looking at me like that."

"Rules are made to be broken. Rules are in place to prevent anarchy by those that want the fucking power and want the fucking control," Loki decided. "And what's wrong with looking at you? You're in my class."

"Yeah, but I can't read your mind," she'd already tried, "and that was a look," she replied. "And rules are in place to make sure no one gets hurt, and to help."

Though Sookie really did disagree with that sometimes, but only under certain conditions.

"Why the fuck would you be able to read mind?" Loki asked, innocently, of course. "Isn't that breaking a rule right there, trying to read shit that's not your business?"

She smiled slowly, trying to peek again. "I guess it is. Yeah. But you're not readable, so I get points for trying, anyway."

"I'm an angel, I wouldn't be readable," Loki told her. "If you managed to read me, I'd worry for your brain because you'd probably be bleeding from the eyes and nose."

"You're an angel?" Sookie -- well, she didn't really respect him any more than she had before, but she was certainly looking at him differently. "Yeah. I can't read Mr. Castiel at the church, either."

Sentences she never thought she'd say.

"We're not related," Loki said to cut off that question. "I'm the Angel of Death and he's the angel of...something else. I'm much fucking cooler."

"Angel of Death?" Sookie's eyes were huge. "I've heard of you."

To put it mildly. She knew her Old Testament pretty well.

"Have you?" Okay, it'd been so long since Loki ran into someone that knew him, he'd forgotten he liked the attention. "Fuck, I hope so. As much shit as I did, I should be more well known."

"There's this book that mentions you," she said dryly. "I'd hope that anyone who claims to go to church or to have read a Bible knows about the Angel of Death. What in the heck are you doing teaching here?"

"Even Angels of Death get vacation," Loki said, deciding to not get into the story of how he tried help destroy civilization and how God had taken pity and hadn't exploded his head. "God's sort of fallen out of ordering plagues so I'm kicking back and molding young minds to get Him back. Fucker owes me money, still."

"...that's nice," she decided, because that wasn't nice but what else was she going to say? "He can hear you right now, can't He?"

"Probably," Loki said, smirking. "Don't worry, if He's going to come and kill me, He'll send Metatron first and that fucker is annoying. I think even God thinks so."

"What's a Metatron?" She was pretty sure that wasn't in the Bible.

"He is the Voice of God. Come on, do you think humans could actually stand to hear the actual fucking voice of God?" Loki asked her.

"I'm pretty sure that God doesn't like swearing," said Sookie to the freaking angel. Because clearly she knew better.

Loki gave her a look. A long, pointed look. "Have you met God, by chance?"

"...no," she finally admitted, because that was probably a stupid thing to have said. "But that's what they tell us."

Re: You Call That A Class Activity? This Is A Class Activity! [D:FI! 05/12]

flipped-god-off.livejournal.com - 2010-05-12 22:18 (UTC) - Expand

Re: You Call That A Class Activity? This Is A Class Activity! [D:FI! 05/12]

justwantsquiet.livejournal.com - 2010-05-12 22:48 (UTC) - Expand

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