fandomhigh | Ethics & Etiquette - 1st Period

Despite the... weekend of hell and bitey bitey, Deadpool and Steve were there for class and ready to shape young minds with their hard earned wisdom.

"Okay, so things happened, stuff and blah blah blah. Class time now. No vampires here, thanks."

"Unless you happen to already be a vampire," Steve added quickly. "In which case you are, of course, welcome as long as you do not bite anyone. So! In light of this past week's events, and some confusion that I understand occurred over in that other universe, we thought it would be helpful to discuss ways to determine that your friends are who they say they are without hurting their feelings."

"Or having to kill them in a tragic fashion," Deadpool added. Because he was helpful like that. "There are many reasons why your friend may not be your friend anymore. Shapeshifting aliens, alternate timelines, evil goatees, possession, crazy mind control devices, really weird coincidences with people looking like twins..."

"You forgot actual evil twins," Steve provided helpfully. "Additionally, there are clones and people surgically altered to look like your friends. And I'm sure I'm still forgetting something. But the important thing is, when these things inevitably happen to you, how do you deal with them?"

Twins were easy to forget, okay?

"Like, having a special code word to let you know they're the right person!" Not that it helped, really. "Or having a telepath nearby to help out."

"You can also quiz--subtly your friend on something only they would know. But sometimes even these methods will fail you. Like your friend might have been replaced by a Skrull. In that case, you'll need to consider technology."

"Which they won't have." Really, Steve. Really. "But exists! So, how about we come up with a list of questions to subtly question each other in case of being replaced, kaaaay?"

"That sounds reasonable," Steve agreed. "You never know when it'll come in handy."

"Weeeeell. Get on it, kiddos!"

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"Not yet, so far," he said and stroked the top of Angela's head lightly. "If I do, I'd better be something tough and masculine, you know?"

"Like what, a grizzly bear?" Tara asked, raising an eyebrow. "I dunno. I'd wanna be something where I could still stay in my dorm room and not try to eat my friends or anything."

"No, not like that," he answered, shaking his head. "Like a bulldog or an eagle or something like that."

"I think I'd like to be a bird," Tara agreed. "Maybe a rabbit."

She tapped her pen on the paper. "Maybe we could ask something personal, like, when was the first time you met so-and-so?"

"Good call," he said, nodding. "Even if someone looks like me, no one else but me is gonna know that we worked together on this activity. For an example."

"For example," Tara agreed solemnly. "Unless they g-get way too invested in memorizing everything radio says, and that's just creepy."

"Yeah and waaaaaaay too time consuming," he agreed. "I think you could ask things about the island too. Like I could ask you about Caritas and what kind of band plays there."

Tara scrunched her nose. "But if somebody went to the trouble of building a robot that looked like you, or whatever, they might program in stuff like that," she suggested. "Maybe little weird things, like, what color is the rug in the common room?"

"Good call," he said again, nodding. "So, we've got personal questions and really detailed questions. Anything else could be discovered by a clone or a robot or anyone, really."

"Yep," Tara said. "Either little personal stuff or things no one who wasn't one of us would bother finding out." She made a little bit of a face. "I c-can't imagine having a clone. That's just bizarre."

"The guy who teaches this class looked like me once," he shared. "Kinda creepy."

"... seriously?" Tara had to ask. "Then how come the mask?"

"I don't really know the whole story," he admitted. "He showed me once and he's looked like me before because of the island but yeah, not quite a twin but close enough."

"Weird," Tara decided. "I hope going crazy like him doesn't go with the kinda-twin thing."

"...let's hope not," he said and winced since that hadn't occurred to him. "I like my sanity."

Ethics & Etiquette - 1st Period - 8/3

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