fandomhigh | Ethics & Etiquette - 1st Period

Despite the... weekend of hell and bitey bitey, Deadpool and Steve were there for class and ready to shape young minds with their hard earned wisdom.

"Okay, so things happened, stuff and blah blah blah. Class time now. No vampires here, thanks."

"Unless you happen to already be a vampire," Steve added quickly. "In which case you are, of course, welcome as long as you do not bite anyone. So! In light of this past week's events, and some confusion that I understand occurred over in that other universe, we thought it would be helpful to discuss ways to determine that your friends are who they say they are without hurting their feelings."

"Or having to kill them in a tragic fashion," Deadpool added. Because he was helpful like that. "There are many reasons why your friend may not be your friend anymore. Shapeshifting aliens, alternate timelines, evil goatees, possession, crazy mind control devices, really weird coincidences with people looking like twins..."

"You forgot actual evil twins," Steve provided helpfully. "Additionally, there are clones and people surgically altered to look like your friends. And I'm sure I'm still forgetting something. But the important thing is, when these things inevitably happen to you, how do you deal with them?"

Twins were easy to forget, okay?

"Like, having a special code word to let you know they're the right person!" Not that it helped, really. "Or having a telepath nearby to help out."

"You can also quiz--subtly your friend on something only they would know. But sometimes even these methods will fail you. Like your friend might have been replaced by a Skrull. In that case, you'll need to consider technology."

"Which they won't have." Really, Steve. Really. "But exists! So, how about we come up with a list of questions to subtly question each other in case of being replaced, kaaaay?"

"That sounds reasonable," Steve agreed. "You never know when it'll come in handy."

"Weeeeell. Get on it, kiddos!"

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"Suppose not," Rose said, making a face. "I dunno. What should someone ask you?"

"Hmmm, I guess a lot of it depends on how well the person knows you," Joan said. "Someone who knows me well could ask me about something the two of us did."

"Unless you know them in the other world too," Rose replied. "Though I guess, like with you, I could ask if you enjoyed the tea parties we threw in Etiquette."

Joan nodded. "Exactly, and other versions of us wouldn't know about that. Or even stuff like what cabin we stayed in or who the Vice Principal is."

"Or how weird it is that they named all the cabins after cleaning products this year..."

"Riiiiiiight," Joan said with a chuckle. "Could also throw something in about that double date we went on or the party where we kissed."

"Oh! You mean the date with you and me and Professor Deadpool and that Hannibal kid?" Rose checked. "Cause that one was a lot of fun what with the getting stuck in the pizza oven."

Joan laughed. "Good thing that Hannibal had those magical powers and got you out of there with little injury."

"The magical powers of -" Rose broke off trying to think. "-marshmallow eating. So useful."

"Yes! Who knew that they would come in so handy," Joan said.

"I know I thought they were just good for party tricks at the campfires," she agreed.

"And, hey, it's good that we got to spend the whole summer in the cabins and not just a few weeks, right?" Joan said.

"Well...it was good until all the cabins turned into gingerbread and we had to sleep in sticky beds."

"Yeah, makes you wonder who ever thought gingerbread houses were a good idea."

"People who don't have to live in them?" Rose suggested.

Ethics & Etiquette - 1st Period - 8/3

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