fandomhigh | Culture Shock, Thursday, 6/25, Period 2

Ah, finals week. The best week of the term, so far as Algren was concerned. Today was the day that he could throw whatever he felt like at the kids, call it a major assignment, and then send them on their merry way while letting them think that he actually had taken time to come up with this stuff.

He kind of had. It had taken a lot of whiskey. But that totally counted as thinking.

"I'm going to assume that the lot of you are more or less capable of surviving the shock that Fandom may or may not have brought about. After all, you've been here for a full term now without completely losing your minds. Congratulations."

He tilted his chin upward slightly, looking around the Danger Shop. "But in no time at all, there's going to be a group of entirely new students, who are going to be just as put-off by Fandom as the lot of you were. Now that you know both what it feels like and what the stages of culture shock actually are, it's time to put them to use. When you all arrived, you were assigned a big sibling, so I'm going to assume that you know more or less what their role here is."

Beside each student, a stick-man shimmered into place, frozen in a kind of two-dimensional stupor as though it was trying to figure out what to make of his surroundings.

"This is your little sibling assignment for the rest of the period. And you better believe that he's got a fair bit of adjusting to do. Get to it. And then when you're done, write me a list of challenges that this boy is bound to face during his stay here."

Well, obviously it was a boy. It had legs instead of a triangle at the bottom.

[OCD ~~coming~~ up! Have at thee!]

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Karla wasn't sure she was ready to be a Big Sib for anyone, but she wasn't going to let something as paltry as that stop her. Not for a class, anyway.

"Greetings," Karla said, smiling at the...thing. "I'm Karla, your new Elder Sibling. I'm here to help you adjust, since coming to Fandom is disorienting for almost anyone. I know I had a lot of questions. So, how can I help you settle in?"

Awww, Stickby's big sibling was so helpful for one of those three-dimensionals!

"I'm Stickby," the little stick figure announced. "Good to meet you, Karla! And I do have a load of questions. Like..."

He had to take a moment to think this over. "You get many ink blots around here, do you? Those are the worst."

"Hello Stickby," Karla smiled. Then her brow furrowed in confusion. "Ink blots?" she asked. "What are those? I come from a different world myself, you see. But I don't think they're much of a problem. I haven't seen anything like that since I've been here" the whole seven weeks of it, "and they aren't anything I've heard anyone warning folks about. So, I don't think they're much of a threat."

"They're what happens when the ink comes out of your pen too fast," Stickby clarified, and then he grinned. It was a very two-dimensional grin. "You three-dimensionals might not have to worry about them, but you should see the damage it can do to a proper Two-D sort like me!"

It could be disastrous, really.

"I see," Karla said, trying not to boggle. Was this what she sounded like?

"Well, one good thing I've seen so far about this place is that everyone is really quick to come to other people's aid. So if there's a menacing ink blot handy that has you worried, talk to almost anyone, and they'll try to help." Karla's smile was hopefully very reassuring.

"Most people here worry about gremlins, actually. They're small creatures that bite you and make you think you're something else for a while. They don't seem to hurt anyone, but people act very silly for a few hours. So they're something to watch out for, but not to fear. Maybe since you're...two-D?...they'll leave you alone."

Oooh. That was a very reassuring smile! Stickby was very appreciative of the gesture, really.

"That would be nice. I can't imagine that getting bitten by something would be so great, either."

After all, there wasn't much to him to get bitten in the first place.

"Anything else I should keep my beady little eyes open for?"

They were so beady that they never really closed, actually.

The beady-eye thing kind of made Karla uncomfortable. But if she had one thing going for her, it was her brazen attitude in the face of creepy.

"Well, Fandom regularly has bouts of weirdness. Sometimes, creepy things" like odd little stick-boys with beady little eyes "attack. Other times, it rains glitter for no reason, or is invaded by tiny moose that are all kinds of adorable. The dorms seem pretty safe, so if you want to avoid danger, hang around in there. If you want to help defend the island, there's the Fighting Reserve for fighters, the Magic Reserve for people with powers, and the Support Reserves for people who are neither, but still want to help."

"Support!"

Stickby was not a fighter. Nor was he very magical, really. But he could totally bake a mean pie, if nobody minded that it was colourless and a little on the flat side.

"I'll have to check that out, thanks!"

"Happy to help," Karla said, giving him another smile. "They're always looking for more members. I'm sure you'll be very--" she was stuck on helpful. Those circles he called hands didn't look like they could do a whole lot. "--supportive."

"Also, ummm, watch out for squirrels. They spy on you, lie about what you're doing, and then people on the radio read those lies aloud. So, keep an eye out, okay?" A beady little eye.

"Will do!" There was Stickby, with a beady little eye at the ready for watching out for squirrels.

Partly because of the lies on radio thing. Partly because there was no telling how much paper was used in the making of a stick-figure such as himself, and he really didn't want to get mistaken for nesting material.

He wasn't exactly the domestic type.

"Thank you so much, Karla! I'm sure I'll do just fine now that you've told me all of the important stuff!"

"Welcome!" Karla said, hoping she wouldn't be docked points for completely refusing to give Stickby any kind of contact info. Just...*shudders*

Culture Shock, Thursday, 6/25, Period 2

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