fandomhigh | Heroing [period 2, class #8]

"Hello, class!" Hammer boomed, striding out before the class once everyone was all assembled. "I hope you all had a nice time on vacation. I, meanwhile, stayed behind to protect the island from any evildoers who might attack in its vulnerable state."

He paused, beaming. "You're welcome."

"Today, class," he continued, "we're going to talk about the media. The paparazzi. Your future best friends, as a hero."

"As heroes," he went on, "we must embrace the media, for they will trail around after us, hanging on our every word, once we've saved them all from mortal peril even just once. They will hound us. They will take our pictures. They will want autographs. There will be merchandise with your face on it if you're lucky." Hammer plucked up and waved a shirt with his face, and a coffee mug with his hammer symbol emblazoned on the side. "But the biggest obstacle, my tiny, young, less bright friends, is the interview."

He began to pace. "Newspapers and TV news crews are always trying to corner you for an interview, and while, yes, they are adoring, they always want to know things like which is your favoritie pair of socks, and how old you were when you lost your virginity. If you have." He eyed the class, because he doubted most of these sad kids had gotten lucky yet. "The important thing is knowing how to give answers quickly on your feet. One wrong answer means you'll have to save them all at least three more times to regain favor."

"So!" He clapped his hands together. "Today, class, we're doing an exercise to prepare you. I want you to pair up and one of you gets to be a reporter, and the other gets to be the hero. The reporter asks questions -- and make sure you're adoring, kids, because reporters always are -- and they need to be as personal as you can stand! Hero, answer them as well as you can without humiliating yourself. After five questions, switch! Hop to!"

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"Big fan of publicity, then," Ben commented, eyes shining.

"Huge," Warren agreed, smirking a little. "Really, I write for the paper just to get my name out there."

No, really he wrote for the paper just so that he could kvetch about everything, ever, and make people read about it.

"Oh, you're the columnist!" Ben said with a grin. "I like your stuff."

"You mean someone actually reads that stuff?" Yes, Warren was a little surprised at that notion. "It's mostly just complaining about whatever occurs to me at the time, man."

Just in case that wasn't already apparent or something.

"I'm impressed you can come up with something new every week," Ben told him.

"The week I run out of things to complain about," Warren shared, "is the week that the sky opens up and it rains bubbles and cotton candy down upon the world at large, while bunnies and lions skip through the flowers singing Kumbaya."

...

"And that'd be weird, so I'd probably complain about that, too."

"...cotton candy?" Ben repeated.

"It's fluffy and sweet," Warren explained.

"And made of cotton? Ew."

"Made of thin strands of sugar, actually." Warren shrugged. "It's pink and sticky and annoying little kids scream for it at carnivals. If you like eating sugar, you'd probably like it."

"Sounds kind of horrifying, really," Ben said, making a face.

"Then see, something else to complain about," Warren replied, giving Ben a pointed look. "It's the easiest column to write. I'll never run out of material."

"I'm not really good at complaining," Ben admitted.

"It's therapeutic." Warren tapped his eraser against his notebook a couple more times, and then smirked faintly. "You just pick something you're not happy about, and then you figure out all the little things about that something that tick you off. And then you don't hold back when you make sure the whole damn world knows about it."

A pause.

"You have to be careful, though. There's a fine line between complaining and whining. Nobody likes a whiner."

Ben had heard stories from Aunt Leia about his father a long time ago. "I believe you," he said, nodding.

"So...what's your favorite color?" It was totally the kind of inanities the HoloNets asked. "And are you dating anyone?"

"Dark red," because it was easier than trying to choose between black and red, "and... Kind of? Nothing really official, I guess."

He tapped his eraser against his book one more time for good measure, and then set his pencil down.

"Mostly. Or something."

He sort of sucked at this kind of stuff.

Ben grinned. "You sort of suck at this," he said. "It's a good strategy. Maybe they'll leave you alone this way."

Warren was smiling a bit at that.

"The best way to keep from humiliating yourself is to just drive them all off in the first place. The other guy's probably more interesting anyhow."

"Is there always another guy?" Ben asked, using up the last of his questions.

"Only when you don't want one," Warren replied with a shake of his head.

Of course.

"My turn to pick your brains now, huh?"

"Give it your best shot," Ben said with a smile.

Warren mulled on it for a moment, and then, figuring he might as well start with something more or less simple, he spoke.

"What do you think makes a hero?"

"Someone who does the job no one else wants," Ben said, "who does the right thing even when it's hard, and who isn't it for the publicity."

He was pretty much describing his father as he saw him.

"And how do you know the right thing when you see it?"

Okay, maybe Warren didn't ask such easy questions, after all.

"You trust your gut and the Force," Ben replied.

Re: Pair up and question one another! [03/04/09]

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