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fandomhigh2009-03-04 12:21 pm
is-my-penis.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2009-03-04 12:21 pm
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Heroing [period 2, class #8]
"Hello, class!" Hammer boomed, striding out before the class once everyone was all assembled. "I hope you all had a nice time on vacation. I, meanwhile, stayed behind to protect the island from any evildoers who might attack in its vulnerable state."
He paused, beaming. "You're welcome."
"Today, class," he continued, "we're going to talk about the media. The paparazzi. Your future best friends, as a hero."
"As heroes," he went on, "we must embrace the media, for they will trail around after us, hanging on our every word, once we've saved them all from mortal peril even just once. They will hound us. They will take our pictures. They will want autographs. There will be merchandise with your face on it if you're lucky." Hammer plucked up and waved a shirt with his face, and a coffee mug with his hammer symbol emblazoned on the side. "But the biggest obstacle, my tiny, young, less bright friends, is the interview."
He began to pace. "Newspapers and TV news crews are always trying to corner you for an interview, and while, yes, they are adoring, they always want to know things like which is your favoritie pair of socks, and how old you were when you lost your virginity. If you have." He eyed the class, because he doubted most of these sad kids had gotten lucky yet. "The important thing is knowing how to give answers quickly on your feet. One wrong answer means you'll have to save them all at least three more times to regain favor."
"So!" He clapped his hands together. "Today, class, we're doing an exercise to prepare you. I want you to pair up and one of you gets to be a reporter, and the other gets to be the hero. The reporter asks questions -- and make sure you're adoring, kids, because reporters always are -- and they need to be as personal as you can stand! Hero, answer them as well as you can without humiliating yourself. After five questions, switch! Hop to!"
He paused, beaming. "You're welcome."
"Today, class," he continued, "we're going to talk about the media. The paparazzi. Your future best friends, as a hero."
"As heroes," he went on, "we must embrace the media, for they will trail around after us, hanging on our every word, once we've saved them all from mortal peril even just once. They will hound us. They will take our pictures. They will want autographs. There will be merchandise with your face on it if you're lucky." Hammer plucked up and waved a shirt with his face, and a coffee mug with his hammer symbol emblazoned on the side. "But the biggest obstacle, my tiny, young, less bright friends, is the interview."
He began to pace. "Newspapers and TV news crews are always trying to corner you for an interview, and while, yes, they are adoring, they always want to know things like which is your favoritie pair of socks, and how old you were when you lost your virginity. If you have." He eyed the class, because he doubted most of these sad kids had gotten lucky yet. "The important thing is knowing how to give answers quickly on your feet. One wrong answer means you'll have to save them all at least three more times to regain favor."
"So!" He clapped his hands together. "Today, class, we're doing an exercise to prepare you. I want you to pair up and one of you gets to be a reporter, and the other gets to be the hero. The reporter asks questions -- and make sure you're adoring, kids, because reporters always are -- and they need to be as personal as you can stand! Hero, answer them as well as you can without humiliating yourself. After five questions, switch! Hop to!"
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