Adventures Through History, Thursday, period 2

[locointhecoco]

"Hi everypony!" Pinkie called, waving her hoof from where she stood atop a 1400 pound cheese wheel just inside the door to the Danger Shop. "Welcome to our very last Adventures Through History class! I figured that we'd better go out with as big a history-packed bang as we could, so today we're honoring seven whole awesome parties from Earth history!"

Yep, the pony had discovered Cracked.com. This might just end in tears. Drunken, inappropriate tears.

"We've got Andrew Jackson's giant cheese wheel," she said, gesturing to the cheese beneath her hooves. "We've got Moscow's sea of vodka!" She pointed over to one side, where the students would see a short street lined with onion-domes and excited Russian revelers holding bottles. It was possible she wasn't entirely clear on what vodka was. But don't worry, it's only illusory vodka. No one would be leaving class drunk, today. "We've got Henry VIII of England and Francis I of France's Field of Cloth of Gold!" This time, it was a giant tent -- though not as giant as history would say the tent should be -- painted to look like a castle, in which there were huge tables full of food and knights riding about waiting to joust. "We've got Philadelphia's Constitution party!" Ben Franklin and George Washington were in that direction, pretending to fence with a couple of chamber pots. "The first show at the Colosseum!" An arena in miniature, in which toy boats were shooting at each other. "Alexander the Great at Perseopolis!" He hasn't started burning anything down yet, but the bunch of Macedonian soldiers hanging out in that corner were definitely starting to look tipsy. "And the last great bash of the Wari people!" These guys, on the other hand, had set a fire, a nice, contained bonfire they were throwing cups at. "So lets get down, get funky, and celebrate history!"

And Pinkie started dancing on the cheese.

As you do.

[ooc: What? It was, like, the first link to come up when I googled "famous parties of history". OCD is up and possibly far too extensive. Party on, class.]

Childcare for Dummies [Thursday, June 21, 2012]

[sith_happened]

When the students arrived in the Danger Shop for the last class, their teachers were nowhere to be seen. What *was* to be seen was an elaborate grocery store, carts shaped like cars (and don't think those wheels would point in the same direction the whole time. The teachers are not that nice), and a pair of irritated looking toddlers for each student.

Guess who wanted lunch and a nap. No, not you. The other ones.

Did everyone think that maybe this class would be an easy one since it was the last one? Ha! Your teachers had endless material for this class, kids. Endless.

"The grocery store. Or, as I like to call it, JAN, THAT IS NOT FOR CLIMBING ON," Deadpool informed the class gleefully.

Anakin materialized from behind a precariously stacked sculpture of canned pineapple. "Or 'How Fast Can I Get Out of Here Before Someone Starts Screaming?'"

That screaming person was generally not Juliet.

"Oooo, always a fun game!"

"We've given you a grocery list of fifteen items to find. Get out of the grocery store alive."

That was overdramatic, Anakin.

Or not dramatic enough. Deadpool shrugged at that. "Think if it as a zombie apocalypse movie where you need supplies. And the kid is the zombie. The zombie that has to pee right now."

Cryptozoology 101

[nohattrick.livejournal.com]

The last class met at the Danger Shop, which was once again mocked up to look like The Dal Riada. Unlike last time, however, the bar was full of people; food and drink flowed freely, and music filled the air.

Cheers of "Happy La Shoshain!" greeted the students as they walked into the bar and Trick waved them over. Once again, he was behind the counter, happily pouring drinks for the crowd. The stools in front of him were empty and he gestured for the class to sit.

"La Shoshain is the holiest day of the Fae calendar," he told the class when they had taken their seats. "It commemorates a day of great sacrifice, when the Blood King stopped the Great Fae War, which was driving our--the Fae into extinction."

A beautiful young woman plucked the strings of a harp, drawing the attention of the room. The boisterous noise quieted and she began to sing. The words were not in English, but everyone around them settled in to listen, some singing along quietly, others nodding, or listening quietly with their eyes closed.

"She's singing the tale of the war," Trick told them quietly. He listened for a moment and then began translating. "Once, long before the Fae were divided into the Light and Dark factions that they're in today, two sides fought for dominion over the other. The war raged for many years, the fighting fierce and thick on both sides. Many Fae died, atrocity piled on atrocity, and soon there was not a clan that had not lost brave youths, a family that did not know grief."

The singer continued on, but Trick waved the rest of the song away. "The next few verses are about some particularly awful battles and then they go on to talk about the bravery and wisdom of the Blood King. It's not for me to say, but I'm pretty sure if that king had been as wise and brave as they make him out to be, he would have been able to find a better solution sooner. He waited until there was no other possible choice before he brought an end to the war with his power and he paid a terrible price for it--but not as high a price as those who had fought and died while he waited." Trick looked uncharacteristically grim for a moment before he shook it off and smiled at the class.

"La Shoshain is meant to be a sacred, spiritual day, where people can reflect on the nature of sacrifice and the high cost of violence and how closely the Fae came towards extinction. Most Fae, however, see it as an opportunity to eat, drink, and, err, be merry." Feel free to guess how most people usually interpreted that 'be merry' part, class. "The real benefit of La Shoshain is that it is a day of peace for all, which means Fae are not allowed to use their powers, feed on humans, or commit Fae on Fae violence. No tricks, no cruel jokes, nothing of the sort is allowed to mar the enjoyment of the day. If you are human mingling with the Fae, this is the one day you are perfectly safe."

The song wrapped up at the same time Trick's lecture did and everyone in the bar raised a glass. "To peace!"