fandomhigh | Interactive Religion [Tuesday, January 15]

Biff was in the Danger Room, which was set up as hot, dark, desert town, sipping on a huge mug of coffee as the class arrived.

"Though they've fallen out of favor now," Biff said, "at least on this world, the major religion that dominated my time was a polytheistic one. The Romans had gods -- and graven idols -- for everything. We Jews have just the one. Um, God, not graven idols. We didn't do well with graven idols. I was told by a Phoenician that we wouldn't worry so much if we had more than one god, but he also told me that he'd screwed a turtle, so I'm not really relying much on his spiritual guidance."

He leaned against a pillar. "Your task today isn't to decide if there is a god, or multiple gods, and it's certainly not to rant at me about whatever wrongs you feel religion has inflicted upon you."

He waved a hand towards several giant statues of Apollo. "Your job today is to circumcise that statue of Apollo before the Roman centurions catch you."

He grinned. "It's a religious experience. Really."

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Jamie turned around and gave Romeo a long look.

"You're not related to anyone by the name of Thor, are you?" he asked suspiciously.

Romeo gave him a suspicious look. "None of my house are of that name," he answered.

"So you're not some Norse god in disguise or anything, then?" Jamie asked, because you never could be sure.

Then again if he was a Norse god he'd probably want some of this circumcision action on Apollo.

"Oh what the hell. Grab a chisel. Apollo here is pretty well endowed."

"Could not the gods make better use of their time?" Romeo asked with a shrug. "And if this statue has much, that is more reason to cut him but gently." He took a chisel and went to the side of the statue further from the centurions.

"He's a statue," Jamie replied, "I don't he's feeling anything. Even still... I'm wincing a bit every time I hit this thing."

*Tink* *Tink* *CHUNK*

"Ooo. That's got to hurt."

Romeo winced visibly at that. "We were to circumcise him, not make him a woman!" he said. "Perhaps I should just carve a left in what is left."

"My hand slipped!" Jamie protested as he looked over at the centurions who were both defending themselves from the throng of Jamies while boggling at one duplicate who was re-enacting scenes from Romantic Comdies with sock puppets.

"Go ahead and chip away. If any broom heads come our way I'll distract them."

"I trust thee," Romeo muttered, possibly foolishly. And he set about quickly chipping away what was left of the nethers, reshaping Apollo into a Diana.

A very muscular, flat-chested Diana.

"Well?"

"You've done this kind of thing before, haven't you?" Jamie joked as the centurions began to push their way through the Jamie dupes.

"Say. How good are you at running like hell?" Jamie asked calmly.

"I find it the best way to make friends," Romeo said, tossing down his chisel. "Shall we away, on three?" His muscles tensed for the run.

"Three!" Jamie yelled and started running backwards, raising up his arms toward his quickly losing duplicates.

Interactive Religion [Tuesday, January 15]

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