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fandomhigh2008-01-14 11:04 pm
nojesusfreak.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2008-01-14 11:04 pm
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Interactive Religion [Tuesday, January 15]
Biff was in the Danger Room, which was set up as hot, dark, desert town, sipping on a huge mug of coffee as the class arrived.
"Though they've fallen out of favor now," Biff said, "at least on this world, the major religion that dominated my time was a polytheistic one. The Romans had gods -- and graven idols -- for everything. We Jews have just the one. Um, God, not graven idols. We didn't do well with graven idols. I was told by a Phoenician that we wouldn't worry so much if we had more than one god, but he also told me that he'd screwed a turtle, so I'm not really relying much on his spiritual guidance."
He leaned against a pillar. "Your task today isn't to decide if there is a god, or multiple gods, and it's certainly not to rant at me about whatever wrongs you feel religion has inflicted upon you."
He waved a hand towards several giant statues of Apollo. "Your job today is to circumcise that statue of Apollo before the Roman centurions catch you."
He grinned. "It's a religious experience. Really."
"Though they've fallen out of favor now," Biff said, "at least on this world, the major religion that dominated my time was a polytheistic one. The Romans had gods -- and graven idols -- for everything. We Jews have just the one. Um, God, not graven idols. We didn't do well with graven idols. I was told by a Phoenician that we wouldn't worry so much if we had more than one god, but he also told me that he'd screwed a turtle, so I'm not really relying much on his spiritual guidance."
He leaned against a pillar. "Your task today isn't to decide if there is a god, or multiple gods, and it's certainly not to rant at me about whatever wrongs you feel religion has inflicted upon you."
He waved a hand towards several giant statues of Apollo. "Your job today is to circumcise that statue of Apollo before the Roman centurions catch you."
He grinned. "It's a religious experience. Really."
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
"Do you think we could stick it back on?"
Karal lifted his head to meet the horrified gaze of several centurions, apparently drawn by the noise. He wasn't sure, but he thought they might be trying to cross their legs. "Umm, Seely?"
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
Of course, he was still holding the mallet, and when it arced through the air, the centurions collectively winced. They were definitely trying to cross their legs, which at least slowed their advance.
"What do we do?"
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
Run, running sounded good. But it obviously sounded good to the centurions, as well, who started doing exactly that. "Oh, Sunlord."
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
"Run," Seely repeated, grabbing for Karal's arm as he bolted.
Re: Circumcise Apollo!
He scrambled after him, happy to put as much distance between him, Apollos, little Apollos and men in funny hats as he possibly could. "Bright flame, I could really learn to loathe this class."
Re: Circumcise Apollo!