Love Smart: Period 2, Week 11

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Exhaustion, regardless of whether it's the result of too much sleep or too little sleep, sucks. Despite how tired he was, Barney appeared his usual dapper self, Armani-clad and ready to rock. He didn't get that plague thing so there was no way he was suffering from a cold. His nose was full of awesome and he just had to get some of it out. Frequently.

Overall, he was a sick mess. That wasn't going to stop him from lecturing about how he never got sick and why.

"So, after events during our last class, I thought we should discuss illness. Hey, no one said the syllabus was set in stone. Now, I've never been sick a day in my life. How is that, you ask, given my considerably communicable extracurricular activities? Answer: Awesomeness.

I combat the cold and flu season by injecting heavy doses of Awesome into my bloodstream. Special power. NASA's run tests. Passed them all. Flying colors.

Of course, not everyone shares my ability to fight infection through superior genetics, which is why I'm offering a few hints that can help you safely and naturally increase your BAC (Blood Awesome Count) as you encounter the seasonal symptoms.

Sore Throat

Hot tea and a lozenge? That's JV. Slip on a 100 percent Italian silk tie instead. The pain is just your throat demanding an accessory.

Fever

You may be tempted to put on a comfy pair of sweats and go to bed. DO NOT DO THIS. First, no one in this class should own such a garment. Second, sweats imply acceptance. You fight fire with fire: Suit Up!

Aches

Men don't ache. Leave that to the ladies.

Chills

Studies have shown the best way to fight cold is with body heat. If you've paid attention to previous classes, you're well enough equipped to target and acquire a choice cutlet to warm you up. Heh. "Well equipped."

Cough

A cough is the sound of your lungs high-fiving. They're celebrating your awesomeness. Join in! Light a Cuban, pour a cocktail, and imagine a world without children. Oh right, you are children.

Alone, or in combination, these remedies far surpass the prescriptions of yesteryear. Remember, 'over the counter' is just something they left out of the Kama Sutra.

Students, I ask, what are your own cold remedies? How many of you were able to tolerate your SO during your nasty plague? Who was it who gifted me with more porn? Let me know and I'll give you extra credit."

[ooc: Barney is sick. In many ways. Next week we'll resume our syllabus with some tips on ending relationships.]

Comments

Sign In [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Name and Favorite Flavor Lollipop

Re: Sign In [11/30]

[misshargrove.livejournal.com]

Annette Hargrove, watermelon

Re: Sign In [11/30]

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

Karal Austreben, mint

Re: Sign In [11/30]

[wannabe-pan.livejournal.com]

Andrew Wells, root beer

During the Lecture [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

React to the ill professor.

Re: During the Lecture [11/30]

[misshargrove.livejournal.com]

Annette held a tissue to her nose and kept her distance. She so did not want to get sick again.

Re: During the Lecture [11/30]

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

While Karal would never wish any actual harm on Professor Stinson, he couldn't help thinking that just occasionally people did get what they deserved.

Re: During the Lecture [11/30]

[wannabe-pan.livejournal.com]

Andrew stuck his hand up in the air and waved it about frantically.

Re: During the Lecture [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"Yes?" Barney said, pausing to relieve himself of some overflowing Awesome.

Re: During the Lecture [11/30]

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

Dawn listened to the lecture, and wondered if all the Awesomeness in Professor Stinson's nasal passages was eating away at his brain.

Answer the Question [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

What do you do to prevent illness? How did your relationship hold up versus the plague?

Re: Answer the Question [11/30]

[misshargrove.livejournal.com]

Annette didn't live everyday thinking she was going to get sick. "Take plenty of vitimin C. My relationship held up fine. Of course, when you're laying there on a cot feeling like you're dying, not much else matters at the moment."

Re: Answer the Question [11/30]

[willbedone.livejournal.com]

"Chicken soup," Willow said. "It cures everything. Except maybe an allergy to chicken. Or soup. Though I've never heard of a soup allergy. Then again that does not necessarily mean that one does not exist."

Re: Answer the Question [11/30]

[itsjustlanguage.livejournal.com]

"I... haven't really found anything useful for preventing illness," admitted Hoshi. "I'm not in an a relationship either. But after the whole plague thing, I'm kind of considering a new relationship."

Re: Answer the Question [11/30]

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

"I kinda OD on the antibacterial hand cleaner," Dawn admitted, then smiled over at Sam if he was there, "and my relationship didn't really do much during the plague, since, hi, plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaage and I was pretty busy, but Sam was always there when I woke up and that helped--a lot."

Re: Answer the Question [11/30]

[likethegun]

Sam smiled shyly at Dawn's response. "I couldn't just leave you there without watching over you."

TA Girl [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Waiting for the pinging! Maybe she makes more sense than The Barnacle today.

Re: TA Girl [11/30]

[itsjustlanguage.livejournal.com]

Hoshi was there once her mun remembered that it was Friday, not Saturday. Today she brought sugar cookies with candy sprinkles on them.

She also had plenty of hand sanitizer and was giving Barney a very wary look.

Sick Barney [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Barney is at the desk, coughing, hacking, and blowing his nose. I hope he didn't get any Awesome one you! HIGH FIVE!

Re: Sick Barney [11/30]

[just-add-starch.livejournal.com]

"You sound awful," Fraser remarked from the doorway. "I guess this means I can't pick now to slap you, right?"

Re: Sick Barney [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Barney had not been avoiding Fraser so much as hiding from him over the last week. "Dat's right!" he said, before blowing some Awesome out of his nose.

OOC [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Watch me get sick for making him sick.

Now if you'll excuse me, Dr. Stinson has several lucky patients awaiting their physicals.

Re: OOC [11/30]

[willbedone.livejournal.com]

Every time I blow my nose this morning I think about how my nose is full of awesome. I blame you.

Re: OOC [11/30]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad I was able to influence you in this manner!

*goes to get rid of some extra Awesome*

Re: OOC [11/30]

[canadianpopstar.livejournal.com]

*refuses to take care of the sickly child AGAIN*