Love Smart: Period 2, Week 3

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Barney was suited up and leaning against the board while he waited for students to arrive, as one does. When he felt he had enough in the classroom to merit speaking, he began the lecture.

"The syllabus says today's topic is Courtship. And by courtship I mean getting into her pants. You know, every once in a while I like to send an e-vite to the party in my pants to all the lovely ladies...Where was I? Right! Courtship!"

"Let's take my best friend Ted for example. Ted met this chick, we'll call her Robina to protect the innocent, and proceeded to try to get in her pants via dinner and a misplaced 'I love you.' Of course, Ted failed because he made the mistake of actually thinking he was in love with Robina."

"The point is that you must pretend you care, don't actually get...what is that word? Oh right, emotionally involved." he did a little eye roll, hand wavey thing. "You're trying to start something up with a little sans pants action, not marry her as your virginal self. Learn from Ted's mistake."

"What does this mean for class? Not much since half of you are with" *eye roll* "'The One.' So instead of expanding on this topic, I want to hear things you can say or do to make your significant other think you care about them. Remember, we're pretending to care here, not actually caring."

"Also, please don't believe your email when it links you to some Dangerous Kissing Tips. They are lies, kids. All lies."

[ooc: OMG, that last bit was totally in my gmail last night and cracked me up when I clicked on it.]

Comments

Sign In [9/21]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Name, sex, species

Re: Sign In [9/21]

[bruiser-in-pink.livejournal.com]

Molly Hayes, not yet, human mutant

During the Lecture [9/21]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Talk, pass notes, laugh out loud.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

Karal was looking less than impressed while he took notes.

The best approach to taking notes for this class, he'd decided, was to couch them in terms of what one should never, under any circumstances, do.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[justmisplaced.livejournal.com]

Shawn was most definitely not taking notes.

He was pretty sure by this point, that even he could give better relationship advice than this guy.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[misshargrove.livejournal.com]

Annette was brooding. And she didn't take notes.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[smartestone]

Hermione had never actually headdesked during a class. She was managing not to do so now out of sheer force of will. She was rubbing a temple, though.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[comelyhonour.livejournal.com]

Beauty took notes, because she felt she should.

They might be useful somehow. Maybe as an example of one of those strange Fandom things A.J. had mentioned.

There was a lot of underlining and addition of question marks, though.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

Dawn listened to the lecture and amused herself by imagining Anya dating the professor.

No notes, though, since she was incapable of figuring out how she could make someone think she cared without actually caring about them.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[itsjustlanguage.livejournal.com]

Hoshi had paper, and she had one of those ancient writing devices that used ink. While it looked like she was taking notes, she was actually just making a shopping list.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

Peter was either taking notes or writing one to Willow. It would have been anyone's guess which.

Re: During the Lecture [9/21]

[absolutesnark]

Summer wasn't taking notes either. She was too busy boggling.

Pretending to Care [9/21]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Barney pretends to care about this class. How do you fake caring about a significant other? What do you say? What do you do?

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

Karal's arms were crossed and he looked about as stubborn as he could possibly get. "Pretending to care for someone when you do not is a lie, and a cruel one. It is wrong."

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[twohalvesofaphd.livejournal.com]

Zack was pretending to care about Barney.

He wasn't very good at it.

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[misshargrove.livejournal.com]

"I don't know how anyone can pretend to care about anyone else. Either you care or you don't. Why lie about it?"

Yeah. She probably wasn't an expert here but she was thinking Barney wasn't either.

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[comelyhonour.livejournal.com]

"How can someone even be a 'significant other' if you don't care about them?" Beauty asserted. "Why even bother to pretend, if there isn't anyone you care about, what good is it to make people think there is?"

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

"You can't fake caring about a significant other," Dawn argued. "If they're significant to you, you care about them. End of story."

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[itsjustlanguage.livejournal.com]

Hoshi was really, really trying to come up with a way to pretend to care about someone. "I guess you could buy them little gifts that make it look like you care?"

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[once-a-king.livejournal.com]

"I wouldn't," Peter said, looking disgusted. "It would be dishonourable and distasteful even were it a proper thing to do."

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[absolutesnark]

"If you want to pretend to care about someone, first you have to act like you are interested in what the other person has to say. Showing interest in what they are care about is probably helpful, too," Summer said. Not that she knew this from experience or anything. Really.

Re: Pretending to Care [9/21]

[likethegun]

"I think if you're pretending to care for someone, it means you really care, and you're just too scared to admit it," Sam said.

TA-Girl [9/21]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Wait for her to ping with goodies. Thank her, you know Barney didn't.

Re: TA-Girl [9/21]

[itsjustlanguage.livejournal.com]

Hoshi was there, even if the teacher still didn't know her name. Today she had blueberry muffins from JGOB.

Talk to the Barnacle [9/21]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

He is sitting at the front of the classroom, laughing at the kissing tips he printed off the internet.

OOC [9/21]

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Barney: *tosses ball to dad on TV*

Re: OOC [9/21]

[cantgetnorelief.livejournal.com]

I get that one in my Gmail web clips all the time and it cracks me up every time I see it.

. . . Gmail web clips are so handy for random bits of crack sometimes.