Dealing With Stupid People [Tuesday, August 14, 2nd period]

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

Josh leaned up against a desk in the Danger Shop, hands in his pocket and a grin on his face.

"President Andrew Jackson, in the main foyer of his White House, had a big block of cheese and I can't believe I'm giving this speech," he began. "He did not, sadly, have a cracker the size of Lake Tahoe. I checked. My old boss, the White House Chief of Staff, used this folksy excuse to make us all talk to total crackpots once a year and today that privilege falls to you."

He waved his hands. "Pick a desk, make yourself comfortable, the computer'll drop someone insane off to talk to you. Try not to laugh in their faces--they're all based on real people. Um, sadly."

My Stupid Mouth - John Mayer

Comments

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

The woman muttered something under her breath that sounded a lot like "not weird ones," before rallying back to the topic at hand.

"The people have spoken, sir, and they want English to be the official language. I am here to tell you that if you refuse to look into this important issue, it will go badly for you at the ballot box in November. And not just because you're a bunch of godless heathens."

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

"I'm sure the people have spoken, m'am, but it's quite possible that you didn't hear everyone's voices since a fair number of them aren't speaking in English. Which is probably a good thing for all involved as I can just imagine the kinds of things they may be saying about you."

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

She glared at him. "I've never been so insulted!"

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

"I find that hard to believe," Qui-Gon observed with a very faint ghost of a smile. "Although I think I just pointed out why you may think that might be true. If I were you, I'd be making a concerted effort to learn some of the other languages frequented spoken in this country to check."

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

She stuck her nose in the air. "I will do no such thing. I will simply...avoid those areas where they don't speak English!"

Because that's realistic.

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

Qui-Gon nodded a little sadly. "I'm sure there will be much sadness about you becoming a shut-in then."

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

"I'm not going to be a shut-in!" she said. "I'll move somewhere where everyone's like me! Like....Montana!"

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

Qui-Gon cocked his head to the side, looking puzzled. "I was under the impression that Montana was a part of the United States."

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

"Well I'm certainly not leaving the country," she huffed. "The rest of the world is full of foreigners!"

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

Qui-Gon tried very very hard, but sometimes you just had to give in to the inevitable. That last statement was so absurd and so obviously demonstrable of the woman's point of view that Qui-Gon burst into laughter.

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

"I fail to see what's funny," she said, sniffing.

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

"Yes, I'm aware of that," Qui-Gon acknowledged.

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

Her lips pursed. "Well, I never!" she said, stomping out of the room.

Re: Big Block of Cheese Day!

[jedi-qui.livejournal.com]

"For the sake of the gene pool, I hope that trend continues," Qui-Gon murmured and went to pour himself another cup of coffee.