janet_fraiser (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
janet_fraiser) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2005-09-07 02:53 pm
janet_fraiser) wrote in fandomhigh2005-09-07 02:53 pm
Entry tags:
Never Volunteer
Posted in response to Library Rules of Conduct by [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com].
Janet stands by the door outside the library, sipping her coffee and reading the rules. Finally she stops, sighs, and chugs the rest of the cup before tossing it in a wastebasked helpfully set next to the doors. She walks into the library, rolls her eyes at the horde of students milling around the desk and eyes someone official-looking--if by 'official' you meant 'carries a large sword and fits the description of the librarian'--slipping off into the stacks with a desperate air.
"Some kind of place we have here," she mutters, making her way through the crowd by use of judicious elbowing where needed, going behind the desk, and hunting for a library form. She raises an eyebrow at a stack of half-complete forms filled out in various colors of sparkly ink and crayon, along with a few that are reasonably complete and one that seems to have been finger-painted. The one that finds completed in human blood she pitches directly into the waste basket with an eyeroll. Luckily, a box of forms isn't difficult to find, nor is a box of pens and a few empty inboxes.
She's been in the Air Force. She knows damn well not to volunteer for anything. But Janet hates disorder and she's going to do something about it.
She catches Ms. Sidle's eyes, grins briefly, and then clambers onto the counter and looks over the crowd. "All right, people, let's keep it down!" she yells, her hands on her hips.
The crowd slowly--and reluctantly--quiets under Janet's glare. "Line up," she says, using the tone of voice she reserves for recalcitrant patients. "Take a blank form--I don't care if you've filled it out already, too many of you thought you'd be funny with the paperwork and didn't do it right. Then take a pen--blue or black ink only is acceptable here, people--and fill out the form. Fill it out completely and correctly."
She raises an eyebrow at someone who looks about to protest.
"To those of you who filled the form out right the first time, thank you," she says. "Sorry to have to make you do this again, but the forms have been contaminated by bodily fluids--" She glares at someone who snickers. "Get your mind out of the gutter; we have demon worshippers who think a library contract is valid if they fill it out in human blood."
She surveys the crowd one final time. "Hand your form over to me. I'll make sure it's complete, then make sure Professor Methos gets all of them when he decides it's safe to come out of hiding. Got it?"
Janet stands by the door outside the library, sipping her coffee and reading the rules. Finally she stops, sighs, and chugs the rest of the cup before tossing it in a wastebasked helpfully set next to the doors. She walks into the library, rolls her eyes at the horde of students milling around the desk and eyes someone official-looking--if by 'official' you meant 'carries a large sword and fits the description of the librarian'--slipping off into the stacks with a desperate air.
"Some kind of place we have here," she mutters, making her way through the crowd by use of judicious elbowing where needed, going behind the desk, and hunting for a library form. She raises an eyebrow at a stack of half-complete forms filled out in various colors of sparkly ink and crayon, along with a few that are reasonably complete and one that seems to have been finger-painted. The one that finds completed in human blood she pitches directly into the waste basket with an eyeroll. Luckily, a box of forms isn't difficult to find, nor is a box of pens and a few empty inboxes.
She's been in the Air Force. She knows damn well not to volunteer for anything. But Janet hates disorder and she's going to do something about it.
She catches Ms. Sidle's eyes, grins briefly, and then clambers onto the counter and looks over the crowd. "All right, people, let's keep it down!" she yells, her hands on her hips.
The crowd slowly--and reluctantly--quiets under Janet's glare. "Line up," she says, using the tone of voice she reserves for recalcitrant patients. "Take a blank form--I don't care if you've filled it out already, too many of you thought you'd be funny with the paperwork and didn't do it right. Then take a pen--blue or black ink only is acceptable here, people--and fill out the form. Fill it out completely and correctly."
She raises an eyebrow at someone who looks about to protest.
"To those of you who filled the form out right the first time, thank you," she says. "Sorry to have to make you do this again, but the forms have been contaminated by bodily fluids--" She glares at someone who snickers. "Get your mind out of the gutter; we have demon worshippers who think a library contract is valid if they fill it out in human blood."
She surveys the crowd one final time. "Hand your form over to me. I'll make sure it's complete, then make sure Professor Methos gets all of them when he decides it's safe to come out of hiding. Got it?"
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