fandomhigh | Driver's Education - 3rd Period

Upon entering the Danger~~room~~shop, the students would notice that it looked as though they stepped out into the parking lot. In the middle of the empty lot was a red VW Beetle and Deadpool leaning against it, grinning like a maniac. So, essentially he was smiling normally.

"Good morning little monsters who I'm constantly tempted to kill, but am restrained from doing so by the fact that I won't get paid if I do." Another happy grin, completely with a little head tilt. "We're driving for real today on a specially designed obstacle course, The Suburban Neighborhood. Stop signs, yield signs and children crossing signs galore!"

He held up a set of keys, jingling it like one would to amuse a baby. "I'll only be able to take you out one group at a time, and only one person from each group gets to drive sadly, but the other two can sit in the backseat and pray that we don't fly off a cliff and crash in a ball of fiery fiery death," Wade said in an attempt to cheer them all up. "The rest of you will wait here until it's your car's turn to go, please no alcohol, fighting, boykissy or flash photography while I'm gone."

Car 1
Yasutora Sado
Ranma Saotome
Jude Lizowski

Car 2
Evie Carnahan
Draco Malfoy
Buffy Summers

Car 3
Molly Hayes
Ron Weasley
Demyx

Car 4
Conner McKnight
Zack Addy
Melaka Fray

Car 5
Cedric Diggory
Elizabeth Delgado
Door

[[ooc: ~~Please wait for the~~ OCD is up!]]

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"Clutch, clutch," Evie said hopelessly, then stomped her foot down. "Clutch!"

The car whined, and Evie shoved the gearshift. It started to roll forward. Sloooooowly.

Why? Why were they trying to kill the Deadmobile?

This made Deadpool very sad.

"Okay, we're going to leave the parking lot now, just stop over there," He said, pointing at an exit that led to a slightly busy street. "And we'll wait for the coast to be clear before leaving the parking lot. Mmmkay?"

"Okay," Evie squeaked. "Oooooo." The car was picking up speed. She pumped the clutch again, and switched gears. The car lurched forward like a zombie on crack. "OOoOoooOo!"

She stomped on the brake as they got close to the Stop sign. The Deadmobile rumbed and died as she took her foot off the clutch. "No!"

"Foot! Clutch! Keep it glued there! No killing my baby's transmission!" He stroked the car soothingly. "Now, try again."

Evie gulped, and kept her death-grip on the steering wheel as she put the car back in gear. "It's just rather-- so many things to do at once! And, and, I don't when to give it gas or a brake or--" She took a breath, slammed the clutch down, then put it in gear, less grinding this time.

And ZOOOOOOOM grind grind shift ZOOOOOOOOOOM grind shift ZOOOOM!

"Wheeeeee!"

That thumping noise that Evie might be hearing was Deadpool, smacking his head on the dashboard over and over again. "Paycheck, paycheck, paycheck."

Evie finally got it into fifth gear, and started doing doughnuts. In the middle of the Suburban street. "Look! I'm doing so well! Aren't I doing well?"

(I wonder if this is just all that bad karma from all the assassinations and beating up of the Coreys.)

"Wonderfully!" Wade said with mock enthusiasm. "Why I didn't pick you to be my TA is just a mystery!"

Evie calmed down a little, looking sheepish, and started driving down the Suburban street again in third gear. With still some grinding.

grrrrr

"Can we have the radio on, to sing with?"

Deadpool eyed the radio warily, not sure if giving Evie something distracting was such a good idea.

He slowly flipped the radio on, and it was ABBA. And Wade was a dancing queen. Only seventeen.

Evie stared. And blinked. "Um..." She managed not to hit a pedestrian, yay! And killed the engine again.

Still a dancing queen, ignoring the near miss at vehicular manslaughter. "Cluuuuuuutch."

Taking this as encouragement, Evie started to sing along. Badly. "Dancing Queen!" Clutch, gear, drive! "Young and sweet!" Speed bump, ker-thunk! "Only seventeen!"

If only he had his gun with him, if only.

That sparring with Yondaime later was definitely going to be necessary for the safety of those who were trying to kill the Deadmobile.

Evie finally brought the Deadmobile to a full and complete stop, and carefully turned it off-- without killing it!

"Yay! Oh, that was so much fun! I wish I could drive every week!"

The mere thought of Evie driving every week broke what was left of Wade's sanity.

But the not killing the car was progress. Right?

"We all wish that, but it wouldn't be fair to the other people in your car who might not make me want to curl into the fetal position and sob until all the horror is gone."

Deadpool was so cheerful about this that Evie wasn't sure if he was funning with her. "Um. Well then! I look forward to Draco or Buffy driving next week!"

Girl's always an optimist.

Driver's Education - 3rd Period - 1/29

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