School Assembly, Friday Afternoon, The Auditorium

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

After watching the crowd gather and encouraging them to settle down long enough to listen to people talk, The Tick began to speak.

"Welcome, students and faculty, to our first assembly of the year! We'll be doing these to help impart something to our students. Give them advice, entertainment, and something worthwhile to do on a Friday afternoon!"

"Today you'll be getting advice from several speakers. They are motivational speakers, people who speak and give advice to help you better yourself! They are the tops in their individual fields, respective Everests, and this assemply is your sherpa, helping you scale that mountain to a better you!"

"Some of today's speakers are professional motivational speakers! Some are fellow students with some special advice! And one is a local business owner just looking to help out!"

"I think it's about time to let them do their jobs now. Please give the speakers your undivided attention and have some fun!"

[OOC: Each speaker will have their own thread, plus there will be a Q&A thread at the end of the post for them to ping into. Please wait to ask the speakers questions until the speakers have pinged in.

There are also a couple of general conversation threads for people who don't want to give their undivided attention. :)

Big thanks to all of the speakers!]

Comments

Re: Speaker 3: GOB Bluth

[bluth-illusions.livejournal.com]

"Hey, kids. My name is GOB Bluth. You probably know me as the guy who runs Caritas, or the guy who coached basketball, or the greatest illusionist this town has ever seen! But I wasn't always so successful. It was only a couple years ago that my entire life was messed up. My father was in jail for light treason, my brother was a jackass, my sister was married to a gay guy who painted himself blue, my youngest brother was a one-handed weirdo, and I was blacklisted from the Alliance of Magicians, a group that I founded to blacklist other people! And I'll tell you what, that life wasn't all it was cracked up to be."

"So I packed up and moved here. Sure, I got lucky a few times. My former boss at Caritas had to leave suddenly, so I ended up with a good deal on a busy bar. I own a freaking business! And sure, when I got here, I spent a lot of money on hookers, but I don't have to do that anymore. Hell, now I have some friends! Friends who like me! Sure my family is still messed up, but they're all the way across the country. If you had told me two years ago that any other this would have happened, I would have stared you in the eye, laughed at you for telling me those lies, and brought the thunder right to your face." GOB held up a closed fist that was clearly supposed to be "the thunder."

"So what am I getting at? If things suck, do something big to change them. You can move across the country. Stop dating high schoolers. Drop out of school. Finally punch that jerk who keeps making your life miserable. Stop doing drugs. Start doing drugs. It doesn't matter, just do whatever you need to do to start a change and, if you're anything like me, everything else will fall into place without you even having to try very hard."

"Enjoy the rest of your assembly, kids."

Re: Speaker 3: GOB Bluth

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty's reaction to GOB's speech could be summed up in the letter "WTF" with a question mark at the end of it.

Re: Speaker 3: GOB Bluth

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia sighed. "I can't believe I liked that guy."

Re: Speaker 3: GOB Bluth

[http://users.livejournal.com/weissguy_/]

"Dude. He's a magician?" Weiss muttered to himself. "Maybe I should rethink this whole magic thing."