fandomhigh | Retail 101, Monday morning, All and Sundries

Edmund is once again sitting on a stool behind the counter.

"Currying favor. It's a grand tradition. Call the person who curries favor well what you will, sycophant, lacky, brown noser - the fact of the matter is that the person who kisses up to the owner and the customer the best is the one who is going to get the promotions, the raises, and the days off when he or she asks for them."

Edmund stands up and favors the students with a smile that, by now, most recognize bodes ill for someone.

"Today you will break up into pairs and will be competing against your 'partner' for my favor. He or she who wins my favor will receive an All and Sundries gift certificate. How to win? Insult your partner, clean my shop, come up with a way to convince Baldrick to bathe, do something to make me happy. Succeed, and you win riches and possibly early dismissal. Fail, and you will be here for the entirety of today's session and I will send Baldrick to recite the grand tale of his great-grandfather's boil to you - the unexpurgated version."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"You two have apparently misconstrued the assignment as 'business as usual.'" Edmund's tone was a degree or two shy of glacial.

"We made some new signs." Blair pointed out his mispelled signs and then pointed towards the mixedup signs Dawn had done. "And Dawn helped!"

"The assignment was to impress me," Edmund said. "To vie for my favor. Not to make me believe that the two of you are suitable candidates to produce the next generation of Baldricks."

Dawn leaned over and sniffed Blair. He smelled fine to her. "We thought we were doing a good thing, by giving you something to criticize. You seem to like that."

Edmund blinked at the two of them and gave them a look ~~best described by the icon~~ that clearly indicated his opinion.

"Which of you do you feel succeeded?"

"Both of us!" Blair bounced excitedly. "By both of us messing up the signs, we've given you equal joy and therefore we should share the gift certificate."

"Just make it out to Blair and Dawn. Or Dawn and Blair. Whichever."

Edmund wasn't up to date enough for the phrase "Are you high?" to pass his lips. Alas.

"Are you drunk? This is not about cooperation. This is about impressing me."

"You're not impressed?" Dawn tried to look woeful. "We could go do more, I suppose..."

"Seriously, man, we can relabel the whole store!" Blair turned to look at the shelfs. "Or maybe turn everything upside down on the shelfs."

"At no time did I mention causing further disarray," Edmund snapped. "Should I bring Baldrick over now? The part where the boil begins to grow is particularly intriguing."

"Ewwwwwwwwwwww."

Blair winced and looked at Dawn worriedly. "Um, I thought you wanted us to make you happy. Aren't you happy that you get to call us names and make us fix all the screw ups we made?"

Edmund rolled his eyes. "That was not the assignment, you cretins. You were supposed to impress me. I can always find reasons to insult you."

"But we gave you easy ones, so you can hone your wit more sharply?" Dawn suggested hopefully, then glanced over at Blair, hoping he picked up the hint. "Er, not that it needs sharpening."

"Aren't you impressed that you didn't have to find a reason this time?" Blair asked hopefully. "I'm sure it was a lot easier to make fun of us today when you didn't have to think about it."

"You're a busy man and you can't be expected to search out mistakes in people all the time. Sometimes you need a break and we gave that to you today!"

Edmund was almost pleased enough that Blair wasn't bouncing at him not to harass them further.

Almost.

"I should have you two hand wash Baldrick's pants to impress me after this. Go fix your signs and decide which of you is more culpable. Then return."

Dawn trudged over to her signs and started rearranging them back to normal. "This was my fault, Blair. It was my dumb idea. I'm sorry. If I have to wash Baldric's pants, would you tell Dean that I L...er, that I'll miss him and Buffy can have my clothes?"

Blair shook his head at her and whispered, "Just water my plant."

Turning back to Blackadder he bounced rapidly. "Man, this was totally my fault. Sorry about that. I'll be glad to...you know...wash the pants."

Twitch twitch twitch.

Why was the boy bouncing?

"That would require talking Baldrick out of them, which I believe some of your fellow students are working on at the moment. Until then, go clean the front window, and neither of you have passed the assignment." ~~Aren't you glad there are no grades?~~

Dawn collected the window washing supplies, and handed half to Blair with a sigh.

[ooc: I have to go to bed. Night!]

Blair took his half of the supplies and headed to the window, bouncing the whole way.

[night!]

Retail 101, Monday morning, All and Sundries

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