ext_227668 ([identity profile] suzotchka.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2006-07-27 11:59 am
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Monologuing, etc. Workshop #3, Thursday morning

Ivanova's sitting on top of a picnic table with her elbows on her knees, and the first person to so much as mention the Pink Ladies is going to find themselves in detention faster that Rizzo pounced Kenickie.

"I hope you all enjoyed last week's bit of fun with insults. We're going to move on to a related topic today. As we all know, whether from personal experience or late-night movie marathons, the Bad Guy," this said with a suitably villainous waggle of her eyebrows, "Is rather fond of monologuing at Good Guy - that, hopefully, will be you - often revealing their dastardly plan to carve 'you got punk'd' into Australia with a moon laser. And, of course, insulting you. But because your Bad Guy won't have had the superb training that I have given you, their insults will lack the necessary biting flair.

"This is your opportunity to throw their words back in their face. Charlie," she nodded to Kawalsky, "Got a little taste of this last week when he tried to insult my hockey-playing prowess. I continued the hockey theme and questioned his sexuality a bit. But one of my favourite comebacks was," she shrugged, "Unfortunately uttered by one of my least favourite people. He may be a snake, but he is a witty snake. Garibaldi threatened to use his head as a pinata, but he simply turned, smiled, and said "A pinata? Ah, so you think of me as full of candy and laughter for small children.""

Ivanova hopped off the picnic bench and started pacing. It seemed a compulsion with her. She could never stay still for too long. "You see, the most effective comebacks are the ones that leave your opponent, for lack of a better word, blinking and speechless. Not your garden variety 'your mom' retorts. Those are probably just going to get you laughed at. Your literature teachers, if you ever had any, would have taught you about the importance of motifs and themes in great and boring works of literary pretentiousness. They are no less important here. Continuing the theme makes your comeback more effective, even if it makes it harder on your part. You have to think on your feet and suit your words to the occasion.

"So, speaking of 'your mom' jokes, pair up again. Hopefully different pairs than last week. I want your worst, lamest insult and your partner hopefully comes up with a witty riposte. Marks for creativity. I'll be around to practice on. Go to, go to."

[[OCD a-hoy away! As to why this up later than it should be . . . margaritas are yummy?]]

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Re: Be Insulted by Ivanova

[identity profile] electric-sitar.livejournal.com 2006-07-27 08:00 pm (UTC)(link)
"You leave my hair out of this, you fashion-victim harpy!" Demyx was still flailing.

Re: Be Insulted by Ivanova

[identity profile] electric-sitar.livejournal.com 2006-07-27 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Demyx was, technically, a 'bad guy'. That was his excuse. "What? What's with the eyebrow, are you practicing for an audition to play The Rock?"

Re: Be Insulted by Ivanova

[identity profile] electric-sitar.livejournal.com 2006-07-27 08:11 pm (UTC)(link)
"Thanks. Good to know you think I'm good enough to play in a popular band." Demyx preened a little. "You, on the other hand, wouldn't make it to the second round of that Idol show."

Re: Be Insulted by Ivanova

[identity profile] electric-sitar.livejournal.com 2006-07-27 08:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Demyx winced a little. "Okay, so I've been a little without lately. But I'm damn good with my mouth. I'd show you sometime - oh wait. You're not a man. Could've fooled me."

Re: Be Insulted by Ivanova

[identity profile] electric-sitar.livejournal.com 2006-07-27 08:42 pm (UTC)(link)
"Not my fault you look like you're on steroids," Demyx replied with a shrug.

Re: Be Insulted by Ivanova

[identity profile] electric-sitar.livejournal.com 2006-07-27 08:49 pm (UTC)(link)
"Thanks, glad to know I'm looking good. Better skinny than wide as a blimp."