fandomhigh | The Kludge's Guide to the Universe | Dangershop, Wednesday Afternoon (Week 2)

Wednesday afternoon once again found Harper in the dangershop, with his feet up and a can of Sparky.

After the class had signed in and found places to sit or lean, Harper stood up. "All right, last week we studied team-building. Today comes the important collaterally to team building, a little thing I like to call threat recognition."

"Now you don't want any team you might build to be made of people who'll throw you to the Magog the first chance they get. Unfortunately, in this big, bad, universe, people don't go around wearing signs proclaiming their back-stabbing abilities. In fact they'll go to great lengths to hide it until they can take advantage of you. For example the hot babe charmed by your wit might really be a phase-shifting, tesseracting, servant of evil, or your ship's avatar's slimy new robot boyfriend might really be a psychotic High Guard warship, intent on wiping out all spacefaring life from the universe." Harper did not sound the least bit bitter of those two examples. Really.

"Clearly, if you want to survive, and not end up dead or worse, you have to find a way to uncover the level of threat someone poses to you," Harper said. "Which brings me to the lesson."

Harper fiddled with his remote and three people appeared at the front of the room.

The first was a furry, batfaced creature, with nasty sharp pointy teeth and large claws, dressed in a robe.

The second was a tall, muscular man with a stern expression, laden with weapons. An astute observer would have notice three nasty looking bone spurs sticking out of each forearm.

The third was…purple. And bouncy. With a forked tail.

"These are Rev, Tyr, and Trace," Harper said, pointing at each in turn. "Your job today is to determine who exactly out of these three is the most dangerous, and why."

[ooc: OCD threads ~~coming~~ are up! Post away!]
[Workshop Information]
[~~HARPER HAS LEFT THE BUILDING! There will be tags when I'm conscious again~~ Back.]

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Harper gestured towards the class and the three introduced themselves.

Rev spoke first, with a surprisingly calm and serenity. "Greetings children, I am Reverend Behemial Far Traveler, a humble servant of the Divine. My species is known as the Magog, if you are unfamiliar with them, be grateful for that fact."

"I am Tyr Anasazi out of Victoria by Barbarossa of the Kodiak Pride," Tyr recited, not deigning to make eye contact with any of the students. Or Harper for that matter. "And I have no idea why Harper believes he can teach you how to survive in the universe at large, since it's one of the universe's unexplained miracles that he has."

Harper glared at Tyr and muttered to himself as Trance beamed at the room. "Hi! I'm Trance Gemini, and I'm Andromeda's primary life support officer, which means I mostly work with plants. Oh, and Dylan thinks I'm lucky."

"I'm thinking all of them," Jamie said looking at them all suspiciously.

"I still think the soldier," said Janet. "Though I'm suspicious about the priest now too. How are you feeling, by the way?"

"I'm fine as long as I don't have to... well move."

"That might just be a problem," agreed Janet. "Do you need more ibuprofin? They make it in 800 milligram tablets." She grinned ruefully. "Sorry. Geek moment. Seriously, if you're in a lot of pain when you move, should you maybe stay in and rest instead of going to workshops?"

"This is my only workshop today and it isn't that taxing physically," Jamie said. "I'll probably just hang out over at the cabin for the rest of the day."

"Good." Janet looked relieved. "I wouldn't want you to overdo it. If you need an excuse note some time this week, I can ~~totally forge Tommy's signature on one~~ get you one from the clinic."

"Thanks, I'll do that if I run into any problems."

"I still thin dude with the big muscles is the most dangerous," John says. "I mean, he could pop heads with those biceps! I need a workout regimen to get my arms like that!"

Molly listened to their introductions. "I didn't hear anything to change my mind. I'll stick with Trance."

Remembering the bit about "throwing you to the Magog" and hearing the whole priest bit, Aeryn's looking suspiciously at that one now.

"Can I change my vote to 'The Kludge' for putting us in close contact with potentially life-threatening personages?"

Cameron was still laying low, but as Rev mentioned he was Magog, alarm bells went off in his head and now he was definitely convinced this alien was bad news. Then again, he had no clue what was up with the others.

Okay, so if there was any doubt before, Xander's now pretty sure that *all* of them are dangerous. But *now* he's thinking of Clare- who seemed all innocent and harmless... until one found out that she had the power to open and close the gates to the Underworld.

"Yeeeah, definitely purple-girl. Er, Trance."

"So you're assuming she's dangerous because she's a girl?" asked Janet. "And because girls don't look harmless to you?"

Janet might have a few issues there. One or two.

Xander snorts. "The girls I know are *far* from harmless. And she reminds me of, well, all of them really."

Janet grinned. "Oh, good, I don't have to deliver a feminist rant," she said. "I don't know, I'm leaning away from her being the most dangerous, but I don't think she's harmless."

"She's very... pixie-like," Xander notes. "Pixies can be very, very dangerous."

"I knew this one woman with big, wide blue eyes and fluffy blonde hair," said Janet. "Most innocent expression in the world. Very dangerous."

"Sounds like my friend Clare," Xander says, shaking his head. "You'd never guess that she-" he clamps a hand over his mouth, looking startled.

"That she what?" asked Janet. She looked over curiously. "Are you okay?"

"That she-" held the keys to the Underworld. "Had a black belt in karate. And, uh, I'm fine. Totally fine."

Re: Introductions (Kludge - Wk2)

janet_fraiser - 2006-07-19 17:52 (UTC) - Expand

thenamesxander.livejournal.com - 2006-07-19 18:31 (UTC) - Expand

janet_fraiser - 2006-07-19 18:40 (UTC) - Expand

Elizabeth frowned slightly as the priest talked, remembering the latest reports on the Ori that she'd managed to snag from the SGC. The reference to his species was also vaguely threatening.

Peter is eyeing the Reverend now. He's had bad luck with people of the church.

"I think I'm going to keep my answer the same until I hear more," Sam decided. Even though she had caught the apparent threat of the Magog, she couldn't help thinking of Teal'c, who as a Jaffa had been feared throughout the galaxy. Until he defected and became one of the most loyal people in defense of Earth she'd ever seen."