Playing Detective, Monday

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playing detective

Playing Detective, Monday

There was a guy with long white hair - pulled back in a messy ponytail - sitting on the desk at the front of the classroom. His black-and-red coat hung off his shoulders in a casual kind of way. In fact, he breathed casual in every fiber of his body.

Dante had not planned on getting stuck on Fandom this week, let alone on teaching a class. But it was one hour a week. He could make it work.

"Hey," he said, giving a lazy wave to the class. "My name is Dante. Didn't pick the class or the name, so we're winging it this semester."

At least he said it with confidence?

"I hunt demons back home. Sometimes hunting demons means figuring out what the fuck is going on." He shrugged. "Can't make 'playing detective' any easier than that."

He perched an arm on his leg and looked at the class. "Let's kick this off with the usual," he said. "What's your name, what are you doing there, and have you ever had to figure out what the fuck is going on? Details are cool."

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Snooping.

Arden Finch

Caleb Dooley

Sairis Karkaroth

Or whatever it is Dante's doing up there.

Name, why you're here, details of a time you had to 'figure out what the fuck is going on'. That's the technical term, by the way.

"Hi, I'm Arden Finch, I'm here because I've given some thought to becoming a PI ~~the profession of choice for paranormal fantasy heroines everywhere~~, and I don't know if it counts, but I just spent the last few days trying to figure out what the fuck is going on from my brother's less than helpful texts, because I was a bird when everybody was fighting the devil or something."

Yeah, she was still cranky about this. Both being a bird when she could have been helpful and also what the fuck kind of texts were those, Gray?!?!

Somebody else on the island could relate to this feeling, Arden. Relate a whole lot.

"You get anywhere with that, Arden?" Dante asked, his head tilting curiously. "Any texts you're okay sharing in class?"

Arden was just aggravated enough to do it. She pulled out her phone, pointed to a text at random and read out, "Hey Arden, guess what! Lucifer had a kid, too! He's stuck in the ring that's stuck on Simon." She scrolled a ways down. "Demons attacked the house and kidnapped Simon and when I woke up everyone had gone to hell without me." That one got a heavy sigh. "Kyo is secretly a half-water dragon prince!" And then she held up a text that was a picture of a throat that had clearly been cut open and was partially healed. Beneath it was a caption that just said It's healing!

Beneath that was a text from Arden that said, WHAT HAPPENED?????? and the reply text was, Oh when the demons kidnapped Simon they cut my throat with celestial steel. Didn't I say that?

And then she read out just a few more for funsies:
Castor and Simon are fine btw
"Okay Castor's gonna need to get all his piercings redone but besides that"
Humans don't need all their fingers right?

[All texts either provided or okay'd by

napking!]

Edited 2026-09-07 19:13 (UTC)

Something thoughtful passed over Dante's face. The tilt became a little more pronounced. "So your friend's someone who's used to casual maiming, huh."

"Hazards of fighting demons for thousands of years, I guess," Arden said with a shrug. And, you know, Brutal Baby Bootcamp, but we didn't talk about that outside the family.

"Yeah, that's the classic," Dante said, with a hint of something chipper in his voice. "Well, sounds like what you've got is a basic time puzzle. You know what happened, just not in what order." Beat. "And your friend doesn't like details, which is gonna be a pain in the ass if you get called in to cavalry."

"I'm Caleb Dooley, I'm here because I s'pose I might have t' suss out if the cult that was huntin' me as a kid is still lookin'. And I dunno if I ever...I was more th' subject of mystery than th' one tryin' t'solve it."

"Someone lose you in a crowd?" Dante joked easily.

There had been the mystery of who he was, where he had come from. The mystery of what had been done to him, and then he'd been the subject of a missing person's case except he wasn't actually missing. But he'd been too young and traumatized to do any of the detecting himself.

"I think that was one of 'em, sort of."

"Sort of?" Dante asked.

"There was a cult that was lookin' for me and so I got hid among a crowd o' other youngin's. Though th' remoteness of our hidin' place and magical wardin' mighta had more t'do with it than bein' a face in a crowd."

"I'm Sairis. I thought I might learn some useful tips about discovering information." He was doubtful about that now, if Dante wasn't sure about it.

"I take it demons are a bit more," he gestured vaguely, "rampant? In your world than mine."

Aw, Sairis. Soon you'd learn Dante just looked like he didn't take shit seriously.

"The barrier between the human world and Limbo collapsed about ten years ago," Dante said. Technically his fault, but who was paying attention? "So yeah, they're everywhere."

"That sounds," he searched for the proper word and came up with, "messy. I've summoned a few demons, but letting them loose in the world is rarely a good idea."

Lounging on that desk with insouciance all class.

Dante 'Winging It' Sparda, that's our man.

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Playing Detective, Monday

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Listen to the Lecture

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Talk to the Teacher

OOC