fandomhigh | Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, Saturday, All Day

"Not remotely." Sairis shook his head. "What about Mistala or Lamont? The Shattered Sea?"

"Not even a little," Liliana said. "But I don't believe you're from this plane, darling. That happens not infrequently. This is the center of a dimensional nexus, the convergence of any number of times, planes, and dimensions. Occasionally, people just...slip through."

"It's a what?" And then it was bewildered to intense in three seconds. "How does that work? Is it connected to the river or the mirror world or another place entirely?"

"None of those things, most likely." She looked at him for a moment, then pulled out a moneypouch from her pocket, reached in, and pulled out a coin that he'd never seen, though he might recognize that it was made of gold and platinum. "This is your plane of existence," she said. "Your world, your moons and suns, your stars and distant planets. This is everything that you have ever known until today." She pulled out another. "This is the plane I was born on." A third, holding the three of them between her index, middle, and ring fingers so none of them touched. "This, the one my fiance was. As you can see, they are all individual pieces, apart from one another." And then she put all three back into the pouch and shook them up, letting them jangle together - not only those three, but many more he could hear. "And this is a dimensional nexus," she said, gesturing to the bag. "Where they all meet up at once."

She tucked her purse back into her pocket. "A bit simplistic, but if you'd like to have a deeper conversation after you've learned more about planar mechanics, we can discuss again."

"I would hope it's got a bit more logic to it than random coins in a purse," Sairis said dryly, like someone who had just arrived in Fandom. "How do I learn more about planar mechanics?"

She laughed at that. "Oh, darling, logic? It's less likely than you think. Life is rarely logical, nor is reality. And this island likes to take illogic to the point of absurdity."

So, you know, good luck with that.

"Well, the school has an excellent library, which is always a great place to start," she said. "There are also likely people around who know about planar mechanics. I do, for one." She gave him a crooked smile. "Though, those are lessons not to be begun outside in the cold. The picnic is to get you generally settled into your new university life, at least enough that you can find your way to your room today and survive through until after your first class. I'm assuming you have more questions?"

Sairis frowned. "If reality isn't logical, it usually just means we haven't found the logic yet. Wait - university life? What university? Come to think of it, how did you know my name? I wasn't intending on coming wherever this is, it was an accident."

Yeah, sorry kid, but she was going to have to laugh at that. "The arrogance of youth," she declared to the horse. "That's adorable, darling; do keep me informed of your findings."

Funny coming from her, since she looked like she was maybe a decade his senior at most. At least until her eyes went fathomless and one could feel the weight of centuries.

"This is Fandom University, darling. Not only am I your faculty advisor, you're also already signed up for my class. As for how it happened..." She shrugged. "Perhaps uncovering that will be your first attempt at piecing together the underlying logic that governs this place."

Sairis scowled. It was a fairly impressive scowl, even if it probably wouldn't work on Liliana.

"I clearly walked through some sort of gate to get here, but if you were expecting me, it can't have been an accident. What controls it? Not that I'm against attending university, but I do have things to do back home."

Not even a little. But still, well done. Clearly he'd practiced it.

"Your logic is flawed," she said immediately. And helpfully. "And worse, so is your thinking. For one thing, assuming 'if not X then Y' just blinds you to all other potential possibilities. You're assuming that you have all the information and that you understand have everything works. If either of those is incorrect - and, considering you find yourself in a brand new world and brand new circumstance, the assumption that they are not is an arrogance that even I would not presume to - you have immediately set yourself up for failure. There are any number of other possibilities and potentials that could be behind it beyond it not being an accident. Magical foresight, for example. Perhaps there is someone on staff that can see a few weeks into the future and thus foresees the arrival of new students and their schedules. I'm sure if you gave more than ten seconds of thought before leaping to an easy conclusion, you could come up with some possibilities as well. I would encourage you to try, even if just as a thought exercise to keep your mind flexible."

Yeah, the scowl wasn't going anywhere, though it was now at least a little tinged with thoughtfulness. "I don't think I have all the information, I just thought I had enough. True foresight doesn't exist; of course I didn't think of it. But you're saying it doesn't exist in my world, and the rules of magic may be different here."

Well, fuck. If that were the case, he was starting out much further back than he thought.

"Throwing out the rules - you're all mistaking me for a different Sairis. Possible but unlikely and it would be a massive coincidence. You saw me coming and divined who I was and this is all a trap. If so, it's very clumsy unless you just enjoy playing games, which is always a possibility. Or of course, I fell off the horse and I'm lying on the side of the road to Chireese and this is all a terrible dream. I doubt I'm that lucky."

And now he was being treated to a full on smile. "Well done, darling," she told him, sounding quite sincere in her approval. "It often takes people much longer to throw out their assumptions. I honestly expected an argument."

And instead, had gotten not one but three possibilities.

"Now then, to be very clear, I'm afraid I don't have a good answer for you. The island is, in its own way, sapient - no, I don't expect you to take my word for it, you'll learn on your own time - and whether it simply knows things or influences them is up for debate. I certainly couldn't say, though I have my own opinions. You are, of course, free to choose to believe whatever you like, so long as you are willing to change your mind as you gain additional information. Being wrong is understandable and acceptable. Being inflexible is a disappointment."

Don't disappoint her, Sairis, you've started off so well.

"If you can't change your mind given new information, you're an idiot," Sairis opined. He smirked a little. "Though I suppose I'd have to be willing to be proven wrong on that.

"The island is sapient? Are - no, you hadn't heard of the Shattered Sea." Which was both reassuring and worrying in its own way. "What are your opinions about it, then, Magus Liliana?"

Magus? An acceptable title. Much better than ma'am.

"That it's another conversation best suited for either indoors or warmth," she said with another laugh. "Though, at its most basic, I do believe that it exerts some level of influence over events, likely in a kind of fated capacity."

"It's definitely not warm." Sairis grimaced. "If this is autumn, what is winter like?"

"This is winter, darling," Liliana said. "Who told you it was autumn?"

Sairis sighed. "It was autumn back home. So I've changed seasons, too? I'll have to get a calendar. And a map, if there is one." He sighed again. "I probably don't even know all the things I'll need to know."

He'd never been more than five miles from home since he was almost too young to remember. Now he was on an entirely different world. The learning curve was going to be ridiculous.

"The first thing you actually need is a device called a phone," Liliana said. "It's a pity that Summer is in Ravnica, she was very helpful in explaining to me what a phone is and how it works, but anyone who is from this general time or has been on the island for a few months should be capable of helping you choose one. It's a communication device that also includes a calendar, access to this plane's collected information, and also a way to take instant pictures. If you have money from your world, there is a bank that manages to exchange pretty much anything for the currency this island accepts. If you do not have money, other arrangements can be made."

"I have some money." Sairis took out a pouch much like hers (albeit much simpler) and shook a coin out of it to show her. "Enough for an inn and food for a week. After that...I'm used to trading charms for what I need, if there's a place I can do that."

Well, charms and the clothes, armor, and horses of the knights that tried to kill him. He thought he'd leave that part out for now.

He was filing away the mention of a "phone" and putting aside the things it could do until he saw it for himself.

"As a student, you have access to the dorms and the cafeteria in the school," Liliana told him. "So that's lodging and food, though I believe the dorms have kitchens or some such if you'd prefer to do your own cooking."

If that sounded like madness to her, it's because it was.

"There are also plenty of businesses in town that are likely hiring if you're looking for a way to earn wages. I manage a magic shop, for example."

On the brink of saying he was used to doing his own cooking, Sairis was brought up abruptly. "A magic shop?"

Look, there was "we don't kill our necromancers", and then there was "we let anybody buy and sell magic things".

"A shop that sells magical artifacts," she clarified. "Not reagents or the like. I believe there's another shop that sells magical supplies if you need those kinds of things for your magic."

Tch. Imagine.

"You sell artifacts?" And they didn't kill people or drive them insane?

He nodded distractedly. "I can make my own things if I have the means...sorry, you sell artifacts?"

Wait, different rules. "Are we talking about powerful magic items, often with demonic or fae spirits in them, that have a tendency to do nasty things to people who don't know what they're doing with them?"

"We're talking about magical items that range from party tricks to incredibly powerful items that use mana to work properly and a tendency to do nasty things only if you buy ones that are meant to do nasty things and use them correctly and often nothing if you fail," Liliana said. "Rarely do they run on the souls of anything, that's mostly the province of Innistradi geistmages."

"Right. Okay. Party tricks." Sairis shook his head. "If there was ever any magic that innocuous back home, it's long since been destroyed or lost. The artifacts I know are much more dangerous. And they don't exactly run on souls, they just trap them. Although they could theoretically leach their energy as power." Not that he'd seen any that did that.

Yet.

"Are you looking for employees, with the caveat that if I can find a way home, I'll be taking it?"

Edited 2026-01-05 02:34 (UTC)

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