Stark (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
stykera) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2025-11-04 09:46 am
stykera) wrote in fandomhigh2025-11-04 09:46 am
Dealing With Other People's Trauma, Tuesday 11/4
“I hope you enjoyed visiting the animals last week,” Stark said once everyone had arrived back in the usual classroom. “I did. And I’m sure the animals enjoyed the attention. They’d enjoy future visits as well, I’m sure. Should any of you feel inclined to do that. It benefits everyone, really, if you’re someone who likes spending time with animals. I’d be happy to go back there another week if anyone likes. Or see about bringing a dog or two here for an outing.”
They could take dogs to the park! Or if the weather was terrible maybe to the Danger Shop for a nice fake park!
“Sometimes, this time of year, in this place, people do more to help others than they might otherwise. And they think about things they are thankful for. That can be helpful, sometimes.”
He sighed, a little, maybe wishing there was a dog to pet right now.
“It can be hard to remember, when you're hurt or grieving, that there are still things in your life that aren't terrible. Maybe because the things that hurt hurt too much or maybe too many things hurt or maybe you just can't see past the hurt for a time. It can be helpful to remind people that not everything is terrible. Just so long as you do it carefully. Do not just tell people ‘cheer up’ or ‘other people have it worse.’”
No, really. Never do that.
“But you can gently remind people. Or show them. That some things aren't terrible. That you're still their friend. Things like that. This can tie into what we've said before, about doing small or large things to help others. That's a good reminder but sometimes it helps to hear it spoken, too. I have a friend who is very good at reminding others that she cares and that other people care. And reminding me, particularly, that there were still good things in my life even when I was hurting very much.”
“So…I suppose, let's try to think of ways to remind others that not everything is terrible even if it seems that way?”
They could take dogs to the park! Or if the weather was terrible maybe to the Danger Shop for a nice fake park!
“Sometimes, this time of year, in this place, people do more to help others than they might otherwise. And they think about things they are thankful for. That can be helpful, sometimes.”
He sighed, a little, maybe wishing there was a dog to pet right now.
“It can be hard to remember, when you're hurt or grieving, that there are still things in your life that aren't terrible. Maybe because the things that hurt hurt too much or maybe too many things hurt or maybe you just can't see past the hurt for a time. It can be helpful to remind people that not everything is terrible. Just so long as you do it carefully. Do not just tell people ‘cheer up’ or ‘other people have it worse.’”
No, really. Never do that.
“But you can gently remind people. Or show them. That some things aren't terrible. That you're still their friend. Things like that. This can tie into what we've said before, about doing small or large things to help others. That's a good reminder but sometimes it helps to hear it spoken, too. I have a friend who is very good at reminding others that she cares and that other people care. And reminding me, particularly, that there were still good things in my life even when I was hurting very much.”
“So…I suppose, let's try to think of ways to remind others that not everything is terrible even if it seems that way?”
Re: Listen/Discuss [11/4]
Re: Listen/Discuss [11/4]
Re: Listen/Discuss [11/4]
Re: Listen/Discuss [11/4]
Re: Listen/Discuss [11/4]
Re: Listen/Discuss [11/4]
Then again, wasn't that just Stark practicing what he preached? He supposed he was a good teacher, then. Something in Henry visibly relaxed; he hadn't even known he'd tensed it.
"I am now. Sort of resigned to it, really," he admitted. "It's odd, but I think it helps that I've got my horse here now. Pebbles. And that I've been home and back again. Just sometimes the glum tries to grab you off your stride, if you get my meaning."