Senshi of Izganda (
sailor_meshi) wrote in
fandomhigh2024-05-21 03:39 am
Entry tags:
Delicious in Dungeon, Tuesday, Period 6
Senshi was waiting for them at their assigned classroom today, but only to inform them that all future classes would be held in the Danger Shop and to meet there in the future.
Once everyone had arrived, Senshi turned on the simulation he had painstakingly programmed with the help of Raiden and a lady in purple who had been a little brusque and high-falutin but had given him pointers on how to use it once she realized it was for a class. They were inside a large stone hall, with tall arches and spaces that looked like oversized shelves inset in the wall. It was full of talking people, merchant stands, people offering trade goods, advertising various services, even offering pop-up restaurants and beverage stalls. Even with the volume turned down low, so as to not interfere with the lesson, there was still a steady murmur. There were also large basins full of cool, clean water encircling many pillars, with a strict separation of basins used for cleaning and basins used for cooking and drinking. In all, it resembled more of an indoor flea market than anything one might call a dungeon.
"While this is the top floor proper of my dungeon, it used to be the village catacombs, where the villager's ancestors were laid to rest. All around the walls, many of the loculi still house the bodies of the interred. Folks are supposed to be respectful of the dead, but it's become more of a marketplace and popular gatherin' spot, ever since it was connected to the dungeon proper. Or, well, the dungeon was connected to it. Back home, there's a demi-human slave market up here, but I don't cotton with that kind of thing, so I didn't put it in here. Now, even though this floor is pretty populated, there are still monsters around, though most of 'em are only dangerous to the very new and the unprepared. The three major monsters that exist on this floor are walkin' mushroom, huge scorpions, and slimes. And that's what we'll be huntin' today."
He led them through a large door and then through several twisting and turning corridors until they found themselves in a more deserted area. "This way leads you down to the second floor, but we're not goin' down that far. But it's around here that you're more likely to find walkin' mushrooms and huge scorpions. Now, there are a buncha different varieties of walkin' mushrooms and not all of 'em are edible, but the most common variety, with the red cap and pink spots are the safest for folks new to monsters to eat. As they are easily affected by their environment, their general appearance is a good indicator of what the dungeon they are in is like. Walkin' mushrooms are about a quarter of the size of an adult Tall-Man, and they walk on two feet, which resemble upside down mushroom caps. They have no visible sensory organ, so it is unknown how they are able to detect other organisms, but they can. They're known to chase adventurers but so long as they're only this size, they're pretty harmless. They run with a little plonk-plonk noise, and have a subtle, earthy scent to 'em, so if you hear 'em or smell 'em you can be prepared."
So saying, several walking mushroom appeared at the end of the hall and ran towards them, giving them plenty of time to get used to the sound and find the fragrance in the air.
"Takin' out a walkin' mushroom isn't hard, either. A good bonk right on the top of their caps will do it, or you can slice right through. An important note for when you're either killin' or cookin' 'em. They're easy to cut on the vertical, but difficult on the horizontal, so if you're ever fightin' one - especially the bigger, more dangerous ones - don't bother tryin' to cut or slice on the horizontal or diagonal."
All but one of the mushrooms ran off again, and the corridor was filled the sound of scrabbling, a hard carapace clicking over stone. "Next are the huge scorpions. Their bodies are about the size of a walkin' mushroom, though their tails are roughly as long again and that's not includin' their legs. You can hear 'em skitterin' around on the stone and they prefer deep crevices to hide in. A common mistake when fightin' 'em is to only pay attention to the tail stinger and ignore the front pincers. Those pincers are very strong and sharp and it's hard to get out of their grip when they got you. It's rare a huge scorpion will try to strike you with their tail without gettin' a good grip on you. of course, once they do, that tail lashes out and the stinger will inject a strong neurotoxin into their prey. Folks say that it wears off after a few hours for most folks, but usually by that time, they've already dragged you back to their nest."
Senshi led them over to a wall where there was a large hole in the stone. "When you're tryin' to catch one, think of it as huntin' crayfish. Easiest way is to wave a long stick near their pincers, and once they've reflexively grabbed onto it, drag it out. Still gotta be careful of the tail, but a quick stab to the back of the head will kill it, quick and humane." He demonstrated, sending the haft of his axe into the nook, wiggling it about, and then dragging out an aptly-named huge scorpion. He left the back end of the scorpion in the crevice itself, stabbed the scorpion, and then finished pulling it out once it had gone limp.
"The last monster to watch out for is the slime. Of the three of 'em, slimes are the most dangerous and have the highest likelihood of killin' you. Slimes are goopy green blobs about the size of a humanoid's head. Normally, they don't usually attack people; they're parasites that tend to lurk near water and wait for aquatic creatures to swallow 'em, then cling to their host's stomach and feed off of their meals before movin' into their bowels to reproduce, and are expelled from the body with the rest of the waste. On land and far from water, they make due, usually by clingin' to the ceilin' and droppin' down when they sense prey beneath 'em. They can sense your breath and like to attack when you exhale, landin' on your head and suffocatin' you with their ooze bodies. Don't shout and try not to hyperventilate and you'll usually avoid their notice. If you do end up gettin' a slime on your face, the trick is to not panic. Slimes are real easy to kill with a knife, so long as you know how its organs are laid out."
A large slime appeared in front of them, so Senshi could show how slimes' anatomies were laid out. "Feel free to touch the parts as I'm talkin' about 'em," he said like this was a normal and natural thing. "Knowin' the best place to slice - you don't wanna stab somethin' clingin' to someone's face - will help get 'em free even faster. This is how a slime's organs are arranged. Compared to a human's anatomy, it's like if you turned a stomach inside out, and surrounded your head and organs with digestive fluid. Now, the oblong squishy organ up at the top is the brain. Movin' clockwise around, the long tubes with the purple tips, those are the lungs. If you follow 'em, you can see where they connect to a hole in the slime's body, where it draws in air. The goopy green part is the digestive layer, and you're gonna wanna be careful, because extended contact with that can start to burn your skin. The circle around the organs is actually the stomach, and it connects to a larger organ where the waste goes. That organ also connects to a hole outside the body, that's the anal vent. The darker, denser part of the slime is the foot, which is how it moves along, and then we have the bristly organ, which is the gonad. You wanna kill a slime quick, slice the brain or the lungs and it'll die pretty fast."
He dusted off his hands and nodded. "All right, I'm gonna give you a few minutes to poke at these examples here, just to get a feel for 'em, and then you're gonna catch one of each. And then we'll get to cookin'. Sound good?"
Once everyone had arrived, Senshi turned on the simulation he had painstakingly programmed with the help of Raiden and a lady in purple who had been a little brusque and high-falutin but had given him pointers on how to use it once she realized it was for a class. They were inside a large stone hall, with tall arches and spaces that looked like oversized shelves inset in the wall. It was full of talking people, merchant stands, people offering trade goods, advertising various services, even offering pop-up restaurants and beverage stalls. Even with the volume turned down low, so as to not interfere with the lesson, there was still a steady murmur. There were also large basins full of cool, clean water encircling many pillars, with a strict separation of basins used for cleaning and basins used for cooking and drinking. In all, it resembled more of an indoor flea market than anything one might call a dungeon.
"While this is the top floor proper of my dungeon, it used to be the village catacombs, where the villager's ancestors were laid to rest. All around the walls, many of the loculi still house the bodies of the interred. Folks are supposed to be respectful of the dead, but it's become more of a marketplace and popular gatherin' spot, ever since it was connected to the dungeon proper. Or, well, the dungeon was connected to it. Back home, there's a demi-human slave market up here, but I don't cotton with that kind of thing, so I didn't put it in here. Now, even though this floor is pretty populated, there are still monsters around, though most of 'em are only dangerous to the very new and the unprepared. The three major monsters that exist on this floor are walkin' mushroom, huge scorpions, and slimes. And that's what we'll be huntin' today."
He led them through a large door and then through several twisting and turning corridors until they found themselves in a more deserted area. "This way leads you down to the second floor, but we're not goin' down that far. But it's around here that you're more likely to find walkin' mushrooms and huge scorpions. Now, there are a buncha different varieties of walkin' mushrooms and not all of 'em are edible, but the most common variety, with the red cap and pink spots are the safest for folks new to monsters to eat. As they are easily affected by their environment, their general appearance is a good indicator of what the dungeon they are in is like. Walkin' mushrooms are about a quarter of the size of an adult Tall-Man, and they walk on two feet, which resemble upside down mushroom caps. They have no visible sensory organ, so it is unknown how they are able to detect other organisms, but they can. They're known to chase adventurers but so long as they're only this size, they're pretty harmless. They run with a little plonk-plonk noise, and have a subtle, earthy scent to 'em, so if you hear 'em or smell 'em you can be prepared."
So saying, several walking mushroom appeared at the end of the hall and ran towards them, giving them plenty of time to get used to the sound and find the fragrance in the air.
"Takin' out a walkin' mushroom isn't hard, either. A good bonk right on the top of their caps will do it, or you can slice right through. An important note for when you're either killin' or cookin' 'em. They're easy to cut on the vertical, but difficult on the horizontal, so if you're ever fightin' one - especially the bigger, more dangerous ones - don't bother tryin' to cut or slice on the horizontal or diagonal."
All but one of the mushrooms ran off again, and the corridor was filled the sound of scrabbling, a hard carapace clicking over stone. "Next are the huge scorpions. Their bodies are about the size of a walkin' mushroom, though their tails are roughly as long again and that's not includin' their legs. You can hear 'em skitterin' around on the stone and they prefer deep crevices to hide in. A common mistake when fightin' 'em is to only pay attention to the tail stinger and ignore the front pincers. Those pincers are very strong and sharp and it's hard to get out of their grip when they got you. It's rare a huge scorpion will try to strike you with their tail without gettin' a good grip on you. of course, once they do, that tail lashes out and the stinger will inject a strong neurotoxin into their prey. Folks say that it wears off after a few hours for most folks, but usually by that time, they've already dragged you back to their nest."
Senshi led them over to a wall where there was a large hole in the stone. "When you're tryin' to catch one, think of it as huntin' crayfish. Easiest way is to wave a long stick near their pincers, and once they've reflexively grabbed onto it, drag it out. Still gotta be careful of the tail, but a quick stab to the back of the head will kill it, quick and humane." He demonstrated, sending the haft of his axe into the nook, wiggling it about, and then dragging out an aptly-named huge scorpion. He left the back end of the scorpion in the crevice itself, stabbed the scorpion, and then finished pulling it out once it had gone limp.
"The last monster to watch out for is the slime. Of the three of 'em, slimes are the most dangerous and have the highest likelihood of killin' you. Slimes are goopy green blobs about the size of a humanoid's head. Normally, they don't usually attack people; they're parasites that tend to lurk near water and wait for aquatic creatures to swallow 'em, then cling to their host's stomach and feed off of their meals before movin' into their bowels to reproduce, and are expelled from the body with the rest of the waste. On land and far from water, they make due, usually by clingin' to the ceilin' and droppin' down when they sense prey beneath 'em. They can sense your breath and like to attack when you exhale, landin' on your head and suffocatin' you with their ooze bodies. Don't shout and try not to hyperventilate and you'll usually avoid their notice. If you do end up gettin' a slime on your face, the trick is to not panic. Slimes are real easy to kill with a knife, so long as you know how its organs are laid out."
A large slime appeared in front of them, so Senshi could show how slimes' anatomies were laid out. "Feel free to touch the parts as I'm talkin' about 'em," he said like this was a normal and natural thing. "Knowin' the best place to slice - you don't wanna stab somethin' clingin' to someone's face - will help get 'em free even faster. This is how a slime's organs are arranged. Compared to a human's anatomy, it's like if you turned a stomach inside out, and surrounded your head and organs with digestive fluid. Now, the oblong squishy organ up at the top is the brain. Movin' clockwise around, the long tubes with the purple tips, those are the lungs. If you follow 'em, you can see where they connect to a hole in the slime's body, where it draws in air. The goopy green part is the digestive layer, and you're gonna wanna be careful, because extended contact with that can start to burn your skin. The circle around the organs is actually the stomach, and it connects to a larger organ where the waste goes. That organ also connects to a hole outside the body, that's the anal vent. The darker, denser part of the slime is the foot, which is how it moves along, and then we have the bristly organ, which is the gonad. You wanna kill a slime quick, slice the brain or the lungs and it'll die pretty fast."
He dusted off his hands and nodded. "All right, I'm gonna give you a few minutes to poke at these examples here, just to get a feel for 'em, and then you're gonna catch one of each. And then we'll get to cookin'. Sound good?"

Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Re: Sign In #2
Listen to the Lecture
This is also a great time to ask questions and poke at the three monsters available for you to examine before you do it live!
Re: Listen to the Lecture
Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
That meant he was impressed.
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
He sniffed out a mushroom and sliced it down through the head, lured the scorpion out and stabbed it behind the neck, and caught a slime by way of putting his jacket over his head, exhaling loudly, then turning the jacket inside out over the slime and slicing through its brain.
He wasn't fast at it, but he was a good student. He came back after a while with all three monsters (and one sliced up and beslimed suit jacket).
Re: Hunt
Re: Hunt
Monster Preparation
Walking Mushrooms: "Skin the first three or so centimeters off of it, the first layer is tough and fibrous and doesn't taste good. Also lose the butt, but save the legs and feet, give 'em and the cap a good wash, and then slice them up nice and thick. They're delish."
Huge Scorpion: "Chop off the pincers, legs, head, and tail - especially the tail. Gives you the runs somethin' fierce. You won't die but also, it tastes like ass. Next, you have to slice the sucker up so it heats up even and the juices can seep out. This way, you get all the flavor and it's easier to eat this way. Followin' the scorpion's own segments makes that part easy. Then you pull out the innards like so, like de-veining a shrimp. They're bitter and the texture's all wrong, unless you pickle 'em and serve 'em with beer. The shell'll turn red once it's been boiled and the meat shrinks, makin' it much easier to pull away from the shell."
Slime: "You can't eat these raw. You first gotta wash 'em with hot water and a splash of citrus juice. Then, you can either pat it dry or rub some salt on it and let it dry in the sun. After that, you got yourself one high-quality ingredient. If you can, starve one for two weeks and then dry it. I promise, the taste is worth the wait." He held up a circular device and passed it around. "By the way, this is a portable slime dryer I made myself. Just lock it in there, and it'll dry out nicely as you're walkin' around. The ones you caught today wouldn't be ready for awhile, but I programmed in some dried ones so you can see that they're like. You can slice them into noodles and they're thin and silky, but with a bit of a tang. They can also be used as a binding agent, much like gelatin."
...Nobody tell Summer.
Once he's done explaining, Senshi will sit back and let you prepare your monsters. Everybody brought their best knife skills and left their squeamishness at home, right?
Re: Monster Preparation
Re: Monster Preparation
This class might be the entire reason he decides never to open a restaurant!
Re: Monster Preparation
But she got through it.
"This is so not halal."
Re: Monster Preparation
Look, he'd just been introduced to Doritos today. He had no idea.
Re: Monster Preparation
“Oh, it’s a religious dietary thing,” Kamala replied, trying to think of how to explain this to someone who clearly wasn’t from this world. “It’s nothing you need to worry about.”
Re: Monster Preparation
Re: Monster Preparation
He frowned as he took the pincers and tail off the scorpion. "Is there no way to make these parts edible? It seems like leaving a lot of meat behind."
He was fascinated by the slime. "Can you cook them rather than dry them? Do they work well baked or boiled?"
Re: Monster Preparation
Re: Monster Preparation
Re: Monster Preparation
Re: Monster Preparation
Re: Monster Preparation
No they weren't.
Re: Monster Preparation
She'd probably still drown you eventually, Senshi.
Re: Monster Preparation
"Especially when you feed 'em," Senshi said with a rough smile.
Re: Monster Preparation
Enjoy Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom Hot Pot
There's not going to be enough time to actually cook the hot pot, but that's okay; Senshi prepped hot pot for real back at his apartment and there's plenty for everyone. Settle in with a big bowl of huge scorpion and walking mushroom hot pot and dig in!
What do you think of your first monster meal?
Re: Enjoy Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom Hot Pot
She felt she could at least eat the broth and get away with it.
Re: Enjoy Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom Hot Pot
Talk to Senshi
OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC