fandomhigh | Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day

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!event: welcome picnic

Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day

Whoever worked the weather magic around here had done an excellent job to make sure things were nice outside for all the new (and old) residents of Fandom. It was warm and sunny, but not so humid that people would melt. There was plenty of ~~moddable~~ food and drinks, places to sit in the shade, and more than enough nametags to go around. It was time to celebrate the start of the summer!

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"I don't know why anybody would expect you to use magic if you didn't already," Raiden said, "and I'm pretty sure most people wouldn't use magic on you without your permission. If they do they're assholes and that's probably assault, you could tell the cops. Uh, but sometimes magic stuff just...happens. Like people turn into animals for a little while, or something. For no reason."

Senshi looked more and more dour. Probably the work of the Lunatic Magician. On the other hand, he had lived in the dungeon for over a decade and hadn't run afoul of the Lunatic Magician yet, so it might not actually be a concern for him.

"Cops are like guardsmen?" Senshi asked. "All right. Oh, the most important question. What kind of monsters are on this level?" Sorry, Raiden, but it was going to take awhile to convince Senshi this wasn't part of a dungeon. He was very stubborn and set in his ways about things.

"Monsters? You missed the thing where the artwork came to life, we had some really good monsters around then, but usually not many I think? There's some rare wildlife in the Preserve, but apparently it's 'federally protected' and I'm 'not allowed to cook it.'" Yes, he did air quotes, and yes, he sounded a little put out about it.

"But--but--" Senshi also looked upset. "Good and careful hunting actually keeps monster populations at a healthy rate, so long as the ecological balance is respected."

How was he supposed to get meat now, Raiden?

"Yeah, I know, but they're 'endangered' or whatever." Frankly, Raiden thought the porgs at least were way too numerous for that, and also that God should not have put him on the same island as a porg if He didn't want Raiden to find out what it tasted like rotisseried. But that was beside the point.

"Wait a minute," he said as all the talk of dungeons shook something loose in his brain. "I think you are teaching a cooking class! And I think I might be taking it?" He'd have to check. His memory really was terrible.

Whatever happened to 'be gay, do crimes'? You know, crimes like hunting federally-protected animals just to see what they tasted like when prepared in a variety of ways? AND IF THAT WERE WRONG, DID THEY TRULY WISH TO BE RIGHT?

They may take our lives, Raiden, but they'll never take....OUR TASTEBUDS.

"Are you at least allowed to forage around here?" Senshi asked, looking decidedly not pleased. "And...is there a butcher about that I should know about so I know where to get meat?"

Raiden understood the importance of conservation and all that--if they ate all of the delicious animals there would be no more delicious animals to eat, blah blah blah, but really, if they didn't want to be eaten they shouldn't have been so delicious. It was just sound logic.

"Oh, sure," he said. "I don't think there are any rules against foraging in the preserve, and--we don't have a dedicated grocery store, but the general store has pretty much what you need, or you can go shopping over on the mainland. There's not a general butcher, either, but there is a pork store." For some reason.

Senshi was a conservationist! And that just meant taking some extra time and care to make sure that you were hunting the right animals at the right times and in ways that wouldn't hard that rest of the ecosystem! It didn't mean not eat anything.

"Hmph." It was a sad day when a dwarf could no longer feed himself on the meat he hunted himself and the produce he foraged or grew, but Senshi would persevere. Somehow.

"And do you have a local dungeon to take the students to in order to hunt the monsters for class? Or should I be finding a way back into mine?"

Unless there was another, safer option of course...

"We have the Danger Shop," Raiden offered. "Uh, it's--I don't fully understand how it works, but you can program in very realistic simulations. I don't know if you can taste them, though, but apparently it's all science, not magic." It felt like magic to him, though. "Or there's Portalocity, they could probably transport us to a dungeon." He still didn't understand what a dungeon was in this context, but since it seemed to be critical to the endeavor he was willing to help come up with solutions.

"Hmmm, I don't know how I feel bringin' a bunch of Tall-Men children into a dungeon," Senshi said. Because this was a school right? It just followed most of his students would be children - not that he could tell just by looking at most of them. "Even if the resurrection magic will bring you back--" His expression darkened "--I don't think it's good to risk your first deaths before you're done growin'."

"Resurrection magic?" Raiden echoed. "We don't have that where I'm from." More's the pity. He could think of a few people he'd love to bring back from the dead. "And I'm not sure we have it here, either." Unless the necromancer lady was way fancier than he thought she was.

She could be! You didn't know! She had once been a holy cleric of a healing order!

"Well, no, it's part of the magic of the dungeon," Senshi explained. Very helpfully. "I don't truck with it much because it's unnatural, but the Resurrectionists and the Corpse Retrievers do a pretty brisk business."

Raiden thought about it for another long moment before he concluded, "Yeah, no. I don't think we have that. We have a Corpse Reviver, but that's just a cocktail." A delicious, delicious cocktail. "It doesn't actually revive corpses," he added, in case that hadn't been clear. "Although I'm...I'm sure there are some people around here that have come back from the dead or something. We really do get all sorts."

"It's a special magic that's only in the dungeon," Senshi assured him. "In the rest of the world, death is final, as is right and proper. It's one of the spells cast on the dungeon by the Lunatic Magician."

"I'm not sure I'd be using magic cast by someone who calls themselves the Lunatic Magician..." Raiden said. Was this one of those things where he was just too dumb to see why it was totally a good idea?

"One of many reasons I don't trust it," Senshi said. "But it's not something that they do, it's more something they've already done. There's a spell over the whole dungeon that chains the soul to the body once the body dies. So all a Resurrectionist does is heal the fatal injuries on the body and then...stuff the soul back in, I guess?"

This very scientific explanation brought to you by Senshi "I Hate Magic" Izganda

"Huh," Raiden said. "Never heard of such a thing. And they're actually alive when it's done, not, like, zombies or whatever?"

"No, ghouls are corpses that were possessed by ghosts before they died," Senshi said. "The people the Resurrectionists resurrect are alive again."

Where Raiden was from ghouls were somewhat different, but they weren't here to get into nit picking terminology. "Well, just goes to show, there's always something you haven't heard of yet. Just assume living here will be a lot of that, but most people are operating in good faith, I find."

"Huh," Senshi said. "...I just realized my shelter is back in the dungeon."

Could he get back there? The door had disappeared. But where could he get supplies to make another?

"Your shelter? You mean like your house? Don't worry, we can find you a place to stay. There's a hotel in town, and a couple of apartment buildings and a boarding house--uh, depending on how okay are you with your house having kidnapped people one time. They say it's reformed now." Raiden did wonder a little if it was just biding its time, though.

"That sounds like a magic house and no," Senshi said immediately. "Thank you," he added a moment later to sound less rude about it. But there was no way he was living in a magic house, even if it was the best behaved house in the world. "I suppose I should just go and see where I come to first."

Which would be the MCA, conveniently enough!

After lunch, though. He was getting hungry.

Raiden was always hungry. It was nearly a miracle he hadn't snacked his way through this conversation. "Okay, well--shit. Phones. You'll need to get a phone." Why hadn't he thought of this until now? "I'll track you down later and we'll talk about phones, okay? Or...something." Right now, unfortunately, that hunger was increasingly making itself known, and pretty soon Gluttony would join in.

"Okay," Senshi said, not at all sure what a phone was, or why he'd need one. "That sounds fine."

He was going to go turn picnic food into completely different food because that was how he rolled. "A pleasure to meet you, Raiden," he said, holding out a hand for a shake.

As long as it tasted good in the end, that was all that mattered. "It's been great meeteing you, too, Senshi," Raiden said, giving him an extremely enthusiastic handshake. "I'm sure your workshop is gonna be great!"

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Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day

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