Navaan (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
doesdoctorstuff) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2024-02-12 12:44 pm
doesdoctorstuff) wrote in fandomhigh2024-02-12 12:44 pm
Entry tags:
Creative Writing--So Simple Even You Can Do It! (Probably), Monday, Period 4
"So, like, writing can be really boring."
And good morning to you, class!
"I mean, other people's writing. Writing itself can also be boring, but that's what drinking and sex are for, but that's a future class topic." So, that was in your future, class. Something to look forward to. "It's like our last class--" three classes ago, now "--when we talking about how boring and overused words like 'said' and 'asked' were. As bad as that can be, some writers go out of their way to make their writing extra lame. It's like they were kids and a bunch of cool adjectives and adverbs beat them up a lot and stole their money and never let them sit with the cool kids or something and now these authors have a vendetta against them. Don't be like those assholes, class. You wanna make your writing exciting? You gotta kick your words up a notch. Really make it pop."
Someone had been a character in a Hallmark movie all weekend, it was possible her sense of what made for good storytelling was even more addled than usual. "Why tell me your hero's eyes are blue when you can talk about his 'aquamarine orbs that darkened as he spoke'? Why say your heroine is running when you can tell me that she's dashing furtively around the corner? And sex scenes! I want to know how slowly her fingers slid over his thick, taut, well-defined abs. I want to know how tightly he wrapped his fist in her waist-length curls of deep, glossy, mahogany reddish-brown silky satin hair. How velvety is his tongue? Huh? Huh? No one knows if you just say, 'he licked his lover'! Instead, you gotta put detail and emphasis on stuff like that. Color, scent, texture, all that stuff needs to come through. But there's never an action or a noun that can't be modified and made better. Let's say your heroine asks someone 'Is that for me?' how is she saying it? Sultrily? Disgustedly? Furiously? Excitedly? Dubiously?" Navaan had pulled a thesaurus out and was flipping through the pages now. "If she's lying on the bed, is she doing it exhaustedly? How about sulkily? Bonelessly? Angrily? What's on the bed? Satin sheets? Cotton blankets? Nothing at all? Is the mattress bare? Is it stained? Is it old? Are there springs missing? We won't know unless you tell us! More is better, right? So then the more detail you can shove in there, the better the scene. This goes, like, triple if you have a word count you're trying to make."
"People are always whining 'show, don't tell,' but then your illustrator storms out because your works are 'obscene' and 'unfit for any but the most debauched' so how're you supposed to show stuff, huh? You gotta paint a picture with words or whatever and you can't do that without adjectives and adverbs, a writer's best friends. I mean besides the booze and dirty toys, but let's not get ahead of ourselves just yet. You need something to look forward to, right?"
And good morning to you, class!
"I mean, other people's writing. Writing itself can also be boring, but that's what drinking and sex are for, but that's a future class topic." So, that was in your future, class. Something to look forward to. "It's like our last class--" three classes ago, now "--when we talking about how boring and overused words like 'said' and 'asked' were. As bad as that can be, some writers go out of their way to make their writing extra lame. It's like they were kids and a bunch of cool adjectives and adverbs beat them up a lot and stole their money and never let them sit with the cool kids or something and now these authors have a vendetta against them. Don't be like those assholes, class. You wanna make your writing exciting? You gotta kick your words up a notch. Really make it pop."
Someone had been a character in a Hallmark movie all weekend, it was possible her sense of what made for good storytelling was even more addled than usual. "Why tell me your hero's eyes are blue when you can talk about his 'aquamarine orbs that darkened as he spoke'? Why say your heroine is running when you can tell me that she's dashing furtively around the corner? And sex scenes! I want to know how slowly her fingers slid over his thick, taut, well-defined abs. I want to know how tightly he wrapped his fist in her waist-length curls of deep, glossy, mahogany reddish-brown silky satin hair. How velvety is his tongue? Huh? Huh? No one knows if you just say, 'he licked his lover'! Instead, you gotta put detail and emphasis on stuff like that. Color, scent, texture, all that stuff needs to come through. But there's never an action or a noun that can't be modified and made better. Let's say your heroine asks someone 'Is that for me?' how is she saying it? Sultrily? Disgustedly? Furiously? Excitedly? Dubiously?" Navaan had pulled a thesaurus out and was flipping through the pages now. "If she's lying on the bed, is she doing it exhaustedly? How about sulkily? Bonelessly? Angrily? What's on the bed? Satin sheets? Cotton blankets? Nothing at all? Is the mattress bare? Is it stained? Is it old? Are there springs missing? We won't know unless you tell us! More is better, right? So then the more detail you can shove in there, the better the scene. This goes, like, triple if you have a word count you're trying to make."
"People are always whining 'show, don't tell,' but then your illustrator storms out because your works are 'obscene' and 'unfit for any but the most debauched' so how're you supposed to show stuff, huh? You gotta paint a picture with words or whatever and you can't do that without adjectives and adverbs, a writer's best friends. I mean besides the booze and dirty toys, but let's not get ahead of ourselves just yet. You need something to look forward to, right?"