fandomhigh | Office Hours

Lana stopped in a little shyly. "Professor Cregg? I just heard you were leaving and I wanted to stop in and say goodbye."

"Lana. That's so sweet, come on in and have a seat. Are you excited for summer?"

Lana came down and sat down a little gingerly on one of the chairs. "I am, I guess. I think mostly I'm just glad that this semester is almost over. Hasn't been one of the best, you know?"

"Tell me about it. It seems like we lost so many people! I'm sure it wasn't that many...but because they were close..." she trailed off. "Are you going to have time to go home for a bit?"

Lana shrugs. "I'm not sure. I can't imagine Lex won't find some way to coerce me into visiting though. He's only my guardian till I turn 18, so I'm sure he's going to take advantage of it while he can."

She grinned, "At least he's a good guy, even if does make me crazy sometimes."

"I'm sure you'd regret it more if you didn't go, at least for a little bit." she said as she began to tape another box. "Smallville is in Kansas, right?"

"I know. I'll go. At least to see the Kent's and Lex and my horse. It's just... It's not really home anymore. I don't have a 'home' to go back to. I stay at the castle with Lex and visit people, but nothing that's mine is there."

She shrugged. "But all things considered, I can't complain too much. Just... someday, I'd like a home - a family of my own."

She shook her head, flushing a little. "I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm telling you all this."

She smiled softly, "Because you need to tell someone...and I understand. Home for me is Dayton, except now that dad's sick and living in California with my brother, it isn't home anymore. Neither is DC, and with Ten gone..." she faded off for a minute, staring out the window. "Yeah, I know what you mean, Lana. I thought I had it here. I was wrong."

Lana nodded. "I guess I did."

She was quiet for a moment. "I'm sorry this couldn't have been a home for you. I would have liked to have you around."

"I know. If things had been different, if I hadn't...um, yeah. Too many if's. I'm sure one day we'll both find a place to call home, you know?"

"I hope you do. I hope we both do," Lana said. "Maybe here in this weirdly magical place, if we wish hard enough it will happen."

She shrugged and made a face. "I know, hopelessly naive, but... worth a shot."

"I hate to say it, but here? In this weirdly magical place I think if we wish real hard it might come back and bite us in the butt." she said, absolutely serious.

"My last inadvertant one certainly did," Lana said ruefully.

"Which one was that?"

"Forgot an entire relationship and everything around it. Just gone. Out of my head. And from what I was told, it's one I really wouldn't have wanted to forget. I guess... I guess I was really in love with him."

Surprising how much that still hurt, too. She forced a smile. "I ran into him once accidentally. He... he doesn't remember me either. I kind of freaked out when I found out who he was and fled and of course, he has no idea why. Hadn't thought I was such a coward till then."

"Not Shep." she said, blinking. "You don't remember Shep?"

"Oh God, no!" Lana gasps. "Shep... Shep, I don't think even the most powerful of spells could erase from my memory. He'll always be with me, in my heart, even if I never see him again."

She has to look away as her eyes fill. "He's not someone I ever could or would ever want to forget."

She heaved a sigh of relief, "Good. I'd have hated to have taken that smack and have you not even remember." she said, her eyes twinkling.

Lana laughed despite herself. "Oh God, I am still so sorry about that." She shook her head, "I've never really done the jealousy thing before in my life."

"It's ok, really, Lana. If there's anything I understand, it's jealousy. Plus? I was hot at seventeen." There was a beat and she coouldn't hold back her laughter anymore.

Lana giggles. "Well, if Shep's reactions were anything to go by, you certainly were. And God, he got off easy. You got slapped. I went out and threw up and was sick about it for days. Him? I clung to him for reassurance that he didn't hate me for... ages!"

"Of course he doesn't hate you, Lana. Not that we talked about you at all. Ever. Him being a guy and all."

"Which suggests, of course, that you did? Tell me?"

Lana flushes again. "If you can't or don't want to, it's okay. It's just that I miss him so much and nobody ever talks about him..."

"I know. It's like that with a lot of students who disappear. He..well, he loved you. If he was the marrying kind and you two were older...things like that. It was very sweet."

Lana ducked her head. "Thank you," she said softly. "It really means a lot. We never exactly said the words, but I think we both knew how we felt about each other. At least I hope he did. I do know he didn't want to leave me."

She made herself look up and meet CJ's eyes. "I think I'll see him again someday. Somehow. Might be just wishful thinking, but..."

"He thought the world of you, you know. Thought you were one of the best teachers - people - going."

Office Hours

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