fandomhigh | Ancient Food Crimes; Friday, First Period [05/20].

You know, say what you will about Summer's masochism and cruelty for even conducting and conceiving of a class like this, but at least she wasn't the monster who did the schedule that meant having to subject people to this experience first thing in the morning. But Summer was eager and excited to get started, as she stood at the front of the room with three dishes before he and an eagerness to begin.

"Today," she began, "we're going to be discussing three cases of vintage desserts with ingredients you probably wouldn't normally expect in a dessert and whether or not those ingredients belong in them. I mean, I could literally do a whole class on the discourse of the classic beef fudge, but I decided to bring a couple other examples into the mix to give us a better overview of the range of possibilities.

"Our first case involved a recipe that I was able to trace back as far as the 1800s, but really rose into popularity with the introduction of Ritz Crackers in 1934 and the subsequent Great Depression going on in America at the time. Behold, the mock apple pie, perfect for when you want a nice slice of piping hot Americana but apples are scarce or out of season!

"Next up, we have the chocolate mayonnaise cake, a recipe that started showing up on jars of Hellman's mayo as far back as 1937, though it may have been a more traditional recipe in some circles before it got that sweet, sweet corporate capitalism boost. It's still actually pretty popular in some circles even today, but the one we have to try here is definitely from a vintage recipe in the spirit of the class.

"And, finally, we have the infamous beef fudge, coming to us from a 1967 cookbook published by the wives of cattle farmers and ranchers, which just goes to prove, there's always an economic tie-in for these things. And, yes, it is exactly how it sounds, it's fudge...but with roast beef blended into it.

"So! I'm going to go over a little bit more of what was involved in making these particular examples of bizarro dessert ideas from the past, and then ye brave among you can go ahead and give them a try while we talk about how these came to be, why they came to be, and if they should ever have come to be. Also, if you have any other great stories of unexpected ingredients in desserts, please, for the love of god, share them, so that I can try to make them and foist them upon others as I am foisting these ones upon you today."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Ready for some dessert!

Shane Gooseman

Liz Sherman

Guillermo de la Cruz

Llewellyn Watts

Stark

Gray

Hannibal Lecter

It's not a full-on cooking lesson because Summer really wants to focus on the trying of and the discussion of these foods, but she does go a little bit over what goes into the making of each dish, so you only have to experience it second hand rather than being a direct witness to such crimes.

Everyone's encouraged to get up, grab a fork, and dig into any number of the dishes presented that day, share your thoughts on how they taste, whether or not you think it's guilty of a food crime, what other food crimes you know of in a similar vein, or just balk over the fact that, somehow, all of these probably taste far better than they have any right to.

Goose absolutely had no issues trying any of the food, "these are all amazing," he declared, tilting his head as he considered the dishes, "I really liked the beef fudge," he decided.

"Ohmygod," said Summer, in what she felt was a moment of sudden brilliant realization, "please take the recipe and make that for Ignis some day."

"I'm definitely going to do that," Goose grinned and he was also thinking of what other recipes he could take from this class, sorry Ignis apparently you weren't going to be tortured enough in the upcoming ~~years~~ months.

"Oh," he said with another realisation, "I could try making it at home as well,"

This was definitely going to end badly, perhaps in a lifetime ban from cooking at BETA.

Liz was not brave enough to try either the beef fudge or chocolate mayonnaise cake, she decided to play it safe and try the mock apple pie.

"Actually this doesn't taste that bad," she admitted, "it's definitely quite different but I don't mind it,"

Guillermo was very sceptical about these dishes but he still tried them all the same, "I'm pretty sure these are guilty of food crimes in theory," he said once he had tried them, " but they do actually taste okay," he admitted.

Watts was mostly just amused that Summer's idea of 'ancient' seemed to consist of recipes that for the most part hadn't been invented yet when he was from.

... That chocolate mayonnaise cake was deliciously moist, though.

Stark had tried at least 2 of these last summer and while he'd been horrified at the idea of the beef fudge at the time he had reluctantly admitted it tasted good and not at all meaty.

The cake was new, he thought, but mayonnaise didn't seem too horrifying off an ingredient so he was willing to give it a try. He was almost always willing to try cake.

"I still don't understand the fudge. Or the pie. They shouldn't work!"

"Just goes to show," said Summer in a sweet voice, "you never know about some things until you try them..."

Not that she was suggesting anything like that about certain jello shots or anything, noooo.

"I have no regrets about not trying any past jello shots," Stark said quickly. "And no plans to try any frightening ones in the future."

Oh, Gray remembered these. Well, two of these. The fudge was new. He snapped a photo of it, captioned it, This fudge has meat in it, and sent it to his brother, then put his phone on silent and quickly put it away.

"Is it cheating if I know that two of them are actually delicious?" he wondered aloud as he helped himself to some cake.

He wasn't touching the fudge, because he loved himself.

"Not cheating," Summer assured him, "although taste can sometimes be subjective, anyway. But I'm glad to hear you swing that way with two of these rather than the other."

Hannibal believed in giving things a chance. He would absolutely try all of them.

The end result...he shrugged. "They aren't to my taste, but I'm not terribly interested in desserts to begin with. They're acceptable."

"Honestly," said Summer, "if any of this stuff is to your taste, Dr. Lecter, then I'm doing it wrong."

Edited 2022-05-20 17:50 (UTC)

Hannibal laughed. "Point taken. I shall endeavor to be suitably horrified in future."

Summer is absolutely there if anyone needs her before or after class. Bonus points if it includes inspiration for future classes.

"Were you aware that there are cake recipes with sauerkraut?" Hannibal asked.

"I am aware," Summer was way, wat, way too proud to admit with a lift of her chin and an accomplished grin. "I mostly just went with the mayo one because if I'm not doing jello, there at least has to be a disgusting amount of mayo to make up for it."

"Traditions are important," Hannibal agreed with a smirk.

[[ I have absolutely been SLEEPING on this look for Summer, damn. ]]

Edited 2022-05-20 10:06 (UTC)

Ancient Food Crimes; Friday, First Period [05/20].

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