Stark (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
stykera) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2022-04-19 03:10 pm
stykera) wrote in fandomhigh2022-04-19 03:10 pm
Living with Trauma, Tuesday 4/19, 3rd Period
There were no ominous signs made by raccoons stuck to the classroom door today. There was just Stark at the front of the room, waiting. Waiting and looking like he'd spent a few weeks underground and then been attacked and then gone back to not sleeping well.
"I missed a few classes," he said once everyone arrived. "I was…if you listen to the radio you know already. I spent some time held captive by raccoons. I do not, I'm fairly certain, have rabies." It seemed unlikely Baniks could get rabies, really. Of course being kidnapped by a raccoon cult and held captive in their underground bunker wasn't terribly likely either.
"I'm fine now." For a given value of fine that included sleeping with the lights on and still favoring his right ankle a bit, among other things. "Or I will be. Eventually."
"This isn't the sort of class where we need an exam." Especially considering how many classes had been missed for various reasons. "None of that today."
"We'll just talk more. That's been most of it, so far, so why not continue that way?"
"We've talked, before, about being trapped. Or held against your will. That's happened to me more than I would like. Once would have been more than I would like. Before I ever came here it was nearly all my life, being places I didn't choose and wouldn't have chosen if I could. When I went home the first time after I was here I ended up captive again. More than once. And then last summer I was in a hole but that was different raccoons and then when I went home we ended up jailed and then when I came back there were these raccoons and…it's happened too often. I hope it hasn't happened to any of you. At all. But at least not so often. And if it has I hope you've dealt better with it than I have. I don't…I don't like being trapped. Or feeling trapped even if I'm not. Because it's happened so often."
That wasn't even all the times, really. You'd think Stark might be better at avoiding it by now.
"So what do you do, when things keep happening, things that hurt you? How do you deal with that? How do you keep going? I…try to avoid these situations. I can't seem to. But I try. And lately…I've been leaving all the lights on. Trying to stay around people at least some of the time." He was historically somewhat less likely to end up locked up if he was around people. "Staying far away from the wildlife. Sometimes all you can do is just try to return to normal." Sometimes maybe you were still kind of in shock about the whole raccoon and grenade fiasco.
"You don't have to talk, just like before, but you're all welcome to if you like. About what to do, or what you have done. Or maybe about those five stages of grief from the last time we had class." Weeks ago. Did anyone even remember that? "Or…whatever you like. Ask questions if you have them. Share advice. Just talk."
"I missed a few classes," he said once everyone arrived. "I was…if you listen to the radio you know already. I spent some time held captive by raccoons. I do not, I'm fairly certain, have rabies." It seemed unlikely Baniks could get rabies, really. Of course being kidnapped by a raccoon cult and held captive in their underground bunker wasn't terribly likely either.
"I'm fine now." For a given value of fine that included sleeping with the lights on and still favoring his right ankle a bit, among other things. "Or I will be. Eventually."
"This isn't the sort of class where we need an exam." Especially considering how many classes had been missed for various reasons. "None of that today."
"We'll just talk more. That's been most of it, so far, so why not continue that way?"
"We've talked, before, about being trapped. Or held against your will. That's happened to me more than I would like. Once would have been more than I would like. Before I ever came here it was nearly all my life, being places I didn't choose and wouldn't have chosen if I could. When I went home the first time after I was here I ended up captive again. More than once. And then last summer I was in a hole but that was different raccoons and then when I went home we ended up jailed and then when I came back there were these raccoons and…it's happened too often. I hope it hasn't happened to any of you. At all. But at least not so often. And if it has I hope you've dealt better with it than I have. I don't…I don't like being trapped. Or feeling trapped even if I'm not. Because it's happened so often."
That wasn't even all the times, really. You'd think Stark might be better at avoiding it by now.
"So what do you do, when things keep happening, things that hurt you? How do you deal with that? How do you keep going? I…try to avoid these situations. I can't seem to. But I try. And lately…I've been leaving all the lights on. Trying to stay around people at least some of the time." He was historically somewhat less likely to end up locked up if he was around people. "Staying far away from the wildlife. Sometimes all you can do is just try to return to normal." Sometimes maybe you were still kind of in shock about the whole raccoon and grenade fiasco.
"You don't have to talk, just like before, but you're all welcome to if you like. About what to do, or what you have done. Or maybe about those five stages of grief from the last time we had class." Weeks ago. Did anyone even remember that? "Or…whatever you like. Ask questions if you have them. Share advice. Just talk."
Listen to Stark / Discuss
Re: Listen to Stark / Discuss
"It helps. Knowing I cannot be held again, not unless they have warded somehow against two types of power. And even if they manage that, I have hands and teeth and determination. They will let their guard down at some point, and I will have my freedom."
"Keeping me alive is the last mistake any captor will ever make."