School Assembly, Wednesday, September 15, 2020

[sith_happened]

The auditorium looked like a regular auditorium, the chairs were arranged in a normal way and Anakin was pretty sure that the chance of teddy bear maiming was extremely minimal this week! He climbed up onto the stage and strode to the rostrum. "Hello again, students, and welcome to our third week of extremely productive and life-enriching talks. This week's is brought to you by two of our esteemed business leaders from town--Beau Lionett & Yasha Nydoorin--and they are hear to discuss with you--"

He reached for the cue card the office had provided, "--Using Your Destructive Tendencies for Fun and Profit! Wait."

Too late, Anakin, here come the speakers now!

Comments

Listen to the talk!

[sith_happened]

When Beau and Yasha ping in and give it!

Re: Listen to the talk!

[notarockharpist]

The two figures standing at the front of the auditorium today were a study in contrasts. One, dressed in blue and grey monk vestments -- though the robe was left undone, presumably to show off her killer abs -- was a young woman with brown hair done up in a topknot above her undercut, bright blue eyes that contrasted strikingly with her dark skin, and a good number of gold and jade piercings in her ears and on her face. The other, much brawnier woman in battered grey leathers, with the mismatched eyes and a mess of black-to-white hair, towered over her by at least seven inches, and ... for all that her aesthetic was both hard to miss and kind of scary, she appeared to be trying to hide behind her companion a bit.

On sight, probably not who most other schools would consider assembly speaker material, but this was Fandom.

"'sup," said Beau, who looked mischievously amused to be there despite that whole this-is-Fandom clause. "So I guess somebody volunteered us to come and talk to you about, like, what we do or something? Not sure how that happened, but I'm not gonna lie, me and Yasha here both have kinda a lot of issues with authority so the irony here was a little too funny to pass up, right?

Yasha, who looked deeply uncomfortable with being up here where people could pay any attention whatsoever to her, just shuffled her feet and gave a squinty-eyed shrug of dubious agreement that was partly hidden behind her hair. "We're very qualified, though," she said in a tone that was hard to read: dry and deadpan, and also very soft.

"Totally qualified," drawled Beau. "Since what we're here to talk about is how being really good at beating things up and breaking shit is, like, totally a viable career option." Haha, look at her trying to give career advice.

Yasha had crossed her arms and settled into a scowly sort of hunch beside her, but she gave a little shrug. "Some of you are probably pretty good at doing that, right?" She glanced over her shoulder to the empty space where the hilt of her sword would normally be visible, like she'd been doing every now and then this whole time.

Beau caught the glance and the tiny grimace that followed out of the corner of her eye. "Feels weird without it?"

"I don't like being on this side of enforcing that rule," Yasha muttered.

"Yeah, but at least no one is throwing you over their shoulder about it," Beau pointed out, then seemed to remember that they were actually up here for a reason. "Anyway, like, yeah. When we're back in our world, that's basically what me and Yasha do. Smash sh -- " she shot a quick look over at Anakin and his buzzer thing -- "things and sometimes people, hopefully get to loot a whole bunch of dope items and gear, and get paid for it, right?"

Wait.

"... that kinda makes it sound super sketchy, huh?" Not that Beau looked like she felt bad about that at all, just like she'd realized there might have been a better way to phrase things.

Yasha shrugged again. "It sounds fine to me?"

"Dope," Beau decided. "So anyway, I'm not really sure what they wanted you all to get out of this? I dunno, man, I just got told this morning I got signed up for this, and I thought it would be funny, so y'know."

"And you dragged me into this," said Yasha, not so much complaining as just confused.

"I mean, we are the Fandom contingent of the Mighty Nein," replied Beau, and before Yasha's little head-shake could morph into a full-fledged objection that she wasn't really part of the group, blustered on, "Oh yeah, right! One of the perks of being an adventurer? Strong possibility of getting a badass group name."

Said the girl who was part of, basically, the Hard Nope.

Yasha mostly just looked like she wanted to get this over with already. "Yeah. Anyway. That is all I've got. Go. Give it a try sometime. You'll probably love it. Maybe. I don't know." This was, by the way, delivered in the listless near-monotone that used to have Molly calling her (affectionately!) the charm.

"Or!" Beau added. "There could be like a Q&A thing, right? You could ask us --" another pause and glance toward Yasha and her increasingly visible discomfort -- "you could ask me questions or whatever first. I don't know, I'm pulling this all out of my -- I'm making it all up as I go. But like, yeah. Let's do that."

Was someone taking far too much mischievous glee in having a platform, however accidental, to talk to kids? Yes, just because Archivist Zeenoth was probably feeling some nameless horror right now.

Look, at least they weren't handing out illegal fireworks or condoning underage drinking. You know, this time.