Duke Crocker (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
betterthanaplan) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2020-02-05 09:36 am
betterthanaplan) wrote in fandomhigh2020-02-05 09:36 am
Entry tags:
Advanced Bird Haberdashery, Wednesday, period 2
Duke arrived at the classroom today ready for anything. And found nothing more unusual than blackout curtains over the windows and a small flock of hairy-looking, football sized birds gamboling about and building little burrow-like nests under the desks.
"Huh. Guess the moose decided to give me a break, huh?"
One of the birds suddenly catapulted at him across the floor, swiped at his shin with its razor sharp claws, and then went tumbling off back to its nest. Duke breathed hard through his nose, slipped back out through the door, and went to go gather some extra supplies.
Class rules:
1. Do not eat the birds
2. Do not FEED the birds
3. DO NOT GET EATEN BY THE BIRDS
4. Protective gear must be worn at all times in the classroom
"Make sure to grab some shin guards on your way in," Duke told the students. "Pete over there especially is being a little bitch. And, uh, sorry about the lights. Apparently these suckers are nocturnal, so we're working in the dark today."
Whether Pete's attack had been because Duke was tall and loud, the lights were too bright, or Pete was just Like That was anybody's guess.
"So today we've got kiwis. They're small, stupid-looking, and will disembowel your legs if you're not careful. We're going to make them hats worthy of the Kentucky Derby. Or possibly a royal wedding. Because nothing says a classy day out like a nocturnal bird from another hemisphere wearing a comically large, overly embellished hat."
"Huh. Guess the moose decided to give me a break, huh?"
One of the birds suddenly catapulted at him across the floor, swiped at his shin with its razor sharp claws, and then went tumbling off back to its nest. Duke breathed hard through his nose, slipped back out through the door, and went to go gather some extra supplies.
1. Do not eat the birds
2. Do not FEED the birds
3. DO NOT GET EATEN BY THE BIRDS
4. Protective gear must be worn at all times in the classroom
"Make sure to grab some shin guards on your way in," Duke told the students. "Pete over there especially is being a little bitch. And, uh, sorry about the lights. Apparently these suckers are nocturnal, so we're working in the dark today."
Whether Pete's attack had been because Duke was tall and loud, the lights were too bright, or Pete was just Like That was anybody's guess.
"So today we've got kiwis. They're small, stupid-looking, and will disembowel your legs if you're not careful. We're going to make them hats worthy of the Kentucky Derby. Or possibly a royal wedding. Because nothing says a classy day out like a nocturnal bird from another hemisphere wearing a comically large, overly embellished hat."