fandomhigh | Political Campaigning (Tuesday, April 4, 4th period)

Political Campaigning (Tuesday, April 4, 4th period)

Josh had his feet up on his desk when the campaigning class began arriving.

"Today we talk about paid media, which for the most part these days means television ads. It's the fastest way to reach the most people and in states like California where there are insane numbers of voters and no shot in hell of hitting them all door to door, the only way you'll get your message out."

He began ticking points off on his hand as he paced around the classroom. "And television, especially prime time television time, is expensive. Sure, the federal government has worked it so that the stations are required to give you the least expensive advertising prices, but that will buy you ads at 11:30 on a Tuesday night, which is pretty much useless. And once all of the time blocked for political ads is bought, then you have to pay commercial rates."

He looked at the students. "Other than staff salaries, most of the funding your campaign raises will be going into TV time. The more you raise, the more ads you can buy. You can target your audiences, too--radio ads, ads on cable, ads in Spanish--tailor your message based on the voters your targeting data has told you to, well, target."

He sat back down. "Okay. Last week you saw some of the most effective campaign ads that have ever been produced in this country. Good, bad, doesn't matter. What matters is that they got the voters' attention. Today, try to come up with an ad concept that would get voters' attention if you were running for office. Pair up, chat, brainstorm. Have fun with it. After all, someone's already done the Daisy Ad--you'd be hard-pressed to come up with something more shocking."

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...

Angel signed in.

Jake signed in

Alanna signed in.

Callisto signed in.

Parker signed in.

Elizabeth signed in.

Are you a bear in the woods? Or maybe a giraffe or something?

"Sex sells," Angel said. "QED."

"...I don't think I really want people to think about my candidate and sex together." Jake looked doubting.

"You're ruining my QED," Angel said.

"Yeah, sorry about that, but I wasn't loving that mental image."

"I'm not saying sex with the candidate," Angel said. "Just convincing people that a world in which he's in office is a sexy one. Happier. Healthier. Little, yellow, different."

Jake considered it, then slowly shook his head. "I don't think anyone would buy it."

"Okay, then we're back to 'Vote for my candidate or die of cancer'."

"That, people might buy," Jake nodded.

"Fear sells," Angel acknowledged sadly.

"And since Jake has covered the no-sex angle for Burns quite nicely, we need to come up with something else. Possibly something really weird." Parker stared at her notepad, and then up at the ceiling, then at her pencil. "Wild animals? Cuddly wild animals?"

Alanna blinked a lot. "My mind went to a funny place. It involved our guy standing there cuddling a bear cub and then the mother bear coming into maul him. Thank you Miss Parker." The string on her wrist twitched.

"Which would solve the problem of our candidate quite nicely," Parker muttered. "Okay. Aside from getting him on MTV2?... Wait. That might work."

"Is that a drug? Because I don't think that'll help with the election much." Alanna paused. "My brain is still in a funny place."

"And it keeps trying to drag mine there. Stop it. No, MTV2 is a music channel geared to young adults and teens. A significantly lacking demographic for Burns." Parker paused. "Yes, we would have a credibility problem if we did that."

Alanna's bag grumbled and the ribbon on her wrist jerked a few times. Alanna ignored it. "But teenagers don't vote. And I doubt a teenager can convince their parent to vote for a candidate because they saw them on that channel thing." She paused. "Okay, now I have the candidate dancing to modern 'music'. It is odd and scary and looks like the funny hair guy from last night."

"Funny hair guy?" Parker glanced at the bag, and smothered a smile. "And eighteen-year-olds can vote. They're a significant demographic." She started to grin, thinking of a way to make this ultra-weird. "We could dress Burns as a rapper. Prove he's not racist, elitist, white-guy material."

Josh choked on his coffee.

"Um...card...Trump! He was on TV! It was kind of scary. Um, isn't the voting age 21 or something?" Alanna blinked rapidly. "My brain has left the room, thank you very much."

"Eighteen. You can get drafted and you can vote, we just don't trust you to drink." Parker shrugged, then slanted a grin at Josh. "Tell me it wouldn't shake up the constituency a little, if Burns showed up in pimp chains and a backwards baseball cap, and very solemnly intoned that he wished he was a boy from the rez."

Alanna blinked a lot again. "We're allowed to drink from the day we're born. That sounds like a stupid rule to me." She continued blinking. "Come back brain, come back! Um, maybe have him state some of his political goals in that funny talk that music has?"

"Would this be a fundraising event where you'd be hanging out brain bleach for 200 bucks a pop?" Josh asked. "Because you might have a winner there."

"If they bleach their brains, and we spin them around and tell them to vote for Burns, and push them toward a voting booth, think they'd do it? It doesn't count as brainwashing if they reach for the bleach of their own free will." Parker grinned at him happily.

"Alanna? It's illegal to drink alcohol in the State of Virginia if you're under 21. Some people in the dorms have been breaking that rule for a long time. Not that we know them," she added piously. "I wonder if Burns has any sense of rhythm? I wonder if it would be funny finding out that he doesn't?"

"As far as I'm aware, there's no federal or state law specifically prohibiting brainwashing," Josh said carefully. "I'd say try it and find out. Worst thing that could happen? Supreme Court case."

"I'd buy the bleach. And would people really believe that we brain washed the voting public? Why can't you drink till 21? Personally, I don't drink much, but come on! Twenty-one?! You can teach someone to dance ten steps, twenty if they have a shred of talent. Rhythm and music sense be damned."

"You bring the bleach, I'll bring the lawyers. Woo, Supreme Court, here we come." Parker waved off Alanna's question and said, "Because the younger demographic thinks they can drive a car while drunk. Idiots." She cocked her head. "And now I have the image of Burns dancing for votes, at $10 a dance, while intoning on the dangers of drunk driving. That should take care of any brain cells anyone has left."

Very loud laughing came from Alanna's bag. Alanna herself was currently incapable of speech. Or movement.

"Pretty sure I can hear those cells screaming for their lives as they jump out of my ears, yeah," Josh said.

Parker was giggling too hard to respond to this by now.

...

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Political Campaigning (Tuesday, April 4, 4th period)

Sign in (April 4)

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Brainstorming ad ideas

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After class

OOC