Office #2 at the school, Thursday mid-morning.

[biotic_psychotic]

[CW/TW: Jono's thread goes some dark places. Torture/etc.]

Jack had decided on office hours so once she hit the coffee shop for the largest to-go cup they had she went and camped out in her spartan school office. After about twenty minutes she became bored and out of coffee. Examining the lock on her door, she pulled a multi-tool from her pocket and began disassembling it. Once it was off the door she took pictures of the whole rig and reassembled it. It was tossed carelessly into the bottom desk drawer.

The door was propped open with the wastecan. From another pocket came a tennis ball. Leaning back in her desk chair, she began doing a slow bounce with it from floor to wall and back to her hand.

The teacher is in.

[Open office hours!]

Comments

[biotic_psychotic]

That resonated with her in a way she wasn't sure he meant it to. Wasn't a bad thing. Just strange to hear it said about physical parts. "You gotta feel a lot of something to feel it at all?" she asked.

She got that.

Jack tapped the side of her head. "Same with me in here. Or wherever the fuck emotions live."

[furnaceface]

Jono gave a small nod in confirmation at that. There was a reason he and Hannibal tended toward slightly less... ah... traditional ideas of intimacy.

Well. There were a few reasons. He wasn't about to get into those, here and now.

//Makes sense,// he said, finally. //Connections get carved away, things go numb, you make those connections with whatever else you've got left. Makes it hard to be certain if you're feeling pleasure or pain, sometimes?//

Worked well enough when talking in a physical or a mental sense, didn't it?

[biotic_psychotic]

She gave the smallest shake of her head. "I don't feel pain as pain anymore. Not since I was a kid. It's always pleasure. First thing they did to me. The only way I know the difference is because regular pleasure doesn't leave me craving more. Shit that should hurt?" Lift of a shoulder.

"Real easy to forget I'm all fucked up inside because I been this way all my life I remember. Real easy to hurt other people when you think everyone feels shit the same way you do because pain doesn't really hurt."

[furnaceface]

//I've been so many things in my life, it's hard to tell what's wrong and what isn't, anymore,// Jono noted. //Even emotionally speaking, sometimes.//

He shrugged a little.

//Get a bit of that in a physical sense. Feel a sting to feel anything at all. When you don't get much, that alone can be intoxicating. Still... generally had enough experience before all this to be able to rationalize where other people's lines are drawn.//

For the most part. There was the fragment of his mind that had survived to Fortress X who didn't give a flying fuck what other people's lines were. And the ember of Weapon X would have pushed those lines just for fun.

[biotic_psychotic]

"I almost never know until someone tells me," Jack said and then forced a shrug. "Then there's the other side where I gotta want to listen to what they're saying and give enough of a shit to do something about it. It's new."

Both the giving a shit and the trusting people enough to give their words any weight at all.

[furnaceface]

Jono nodded a little.

//I get asked sometimes why I don't use my powers all the time to make people just not notice or care about what they're looking at when they see me,// he offered. //I know it's not entirely the same, but...// A shrug. //I have to give a shite enough to want to. And by that point... generally the people I'd want to put that much effort into aren't the ones who'd actually care.//

[biotic_psychotic]

"Well that'd be just fucking exhausting," Jack blinked, "Everyone all the time? What the fuck? People suck. They're not worth that kind of tired."

[furnaceface]

//Used it for children before, mostly,// he admitted. //A child who had just lived through a bombing didn't need to see this flaming ruin. Otherwise... people can just sod off, really.//

Fuck 'em. People were exhausting.

[biotic_psychotic]

"Kids," she agreed. Kids were different and broke all the rules for everything.

"When people try to put you out, can't you hit 'em with a loud 'don't'?" she wondered, "If people want you to ninja yourself all the time, would that be a thing you could do?"

[furnaceface]

//Could,// Jono agreed, but hiked up a shoulder slightly. //Suppose having my own head fucked with enough makes me... reluctant to do the same to others, unless the situation calls for it.//

[biotic_psychotic]

She squinted at him for a second. "I'd think having someone try to fucking extinguish you would call for it."

[furnaceface]

Jono hiked up a shoulder.

//They never will. It's more an annoyance than an emergency, generally.//

[biotic_psychotic]

"It's rude, Jon," Jack pointed out with a small frown, "If you could shout 'stop' or 'back the fuck off asshole' at them with a voice, you would, right? How's it different if you have to use a voice in their head?"

[furnaceface]

Jono tilted his head at her slightly.

//I can make people's brains bleed by yelling.//

It made a bit of a difference. Generally.

[biotic_psychotic]

"Yeah? And you can't be loud without that?" she challenged, "Cuz I somehow think you could get the fucking point across without that, so what's with the dickery?"

[furnaceface]

There was a long pause, then. And then Jono ducked his head a bit, trying not to just outright project a sigh, then.

//Around here, it's mostly that I just... don't want to start burning bridges, I suppose. Here I get to be normal, once people adjust. Back home, I'm vermin. Back home, if I push back, it can come back in ways I can't control. I represent the school, there. I refuse to do anything there that'll endanger my kids.//

[biotic_psychotic]

"Dunno, Jon," Jack said slowly while trying to get her head around that, "I'd think maybe someone'd want to be stopped before doing something embarrassing and stupid like trying to put out the guy made of fucking fire. Here, anyway. I can't say much about your home other than 'that's bullshit how you're treated I hope they all drop dead'."

Opinions. She shared.

"But here? Nobody gets to act like that here. Even new people need to adjust their fuckin' attitude right quick. Better off for 'em."

[furnaceface]

//Last person who tried spent the next twenty minutes complaining that I had th'gall to break all known rules of biological science,// Jono replied with a shrug. //Person before that was having a legitimate traumatic response to flame. I suppose it depends on the situation.//

[biotic_psychotic]

Jack flailed her hands in the air for a second with a smothered screaming noise. "What. The. Fuck!? Because if you had a choice you'd walk around unzipped from nose to navel?" Another small screamy noise.

"People. Suck!"

She'd grant the trauma person their trauma. It was a rational fear.

[furnaceface]

//People suck.//

Jono seemed way, way too resigned to that fact.

//Can come up with a few ways I'd rather be than this, true enough.//

[biotic_psychotic]

"There's worse ways to be," Jack argued, "Lots of worse ways. I mean, you could be Republican."

[furnaceface]

Jono blinked.

And then, for all that he really couldn't, at least not physically, Jono laughed. It was more a buzz of clear amusement as opposed to a 'ha ha ha,' but there it was.

//True enough, luv. True enough.//

[biotic_psychotic]

Jack threw him a short-lived but genuine smile. The amusement was better than the dark had been. She knew that dark of old.

"There you go," she said. "Kaidan says he jogs with you sometimes. You ever do that when it's not some sort of fucking punishment hour?" Genuinely curious. Kaidan wanted her to run more. Something to take the edge off all her energy. She had better sense than to wake up at the hours he did.

[furnaceface]

//I save 'punishment hour' for those nights when I can't sleep,// Jono assured her.

The fact that those nights were relatively constant was irrelevant.

//Afternoons work just as well by me, though.//

[biotic_psychotic]

A hand scrubbed over her scalp. "Any day but Monday or Thursday," she said, "Class and office hours those days. You got a phone or should I just, y'know.." Jack tapped the side of her head with a finger.