Fjord (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
built_fjord_tough) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2018-11-19 11:57 am
built_fjord_tough) wrote in fandomhigh2018-11-19 11:57 am
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How to Make Friends & Influence People | 4th Period | Monday
Fjord was... quiet today, standing a little off to the side of the front of the room, arms crossed over his chest, frowning. A little.
"Sometimes," he said, at length, "things happen that'll leave the people around you a little bit out of sorts." Not that he was listing examples or anything, but he figured people could use their imaginations. "Today, we're going to talk about giving people what they need in order to recover from whatever those things might be."
Carter was also frowning, but it was very much because he was restraining himself from fussing over Fjord.
"It's important to consider what they need, rather than what you want to do," Carter said, smiling at the class, since he didn't want them to think both their teachers were unsettled today. "Your inclination might be to rush in with hugs and offers to talk, while what they might need is quiet and space to think. And vice versa, leaving someone alone when they want to talk could just make things worse. It's about tailoring your reaction to their needs—though, of course, they are also responsible for communicating their needs to you in the first place."
"Not that they'll always necessarily be able to," Fjord noted. "Sometimes, when a person isn't doing well, reaching out to other people seems like the most difficult thing in the world. Like they're an inconvenience, or they'll only be throwing themselves out there just to get hurt even more. It can be a complicated thing, trying to figure out what the best way to approach a hurting friend might be." He paused a moment. "I suppose the same thing applies here as it does anywhere else. If you aren't certain what a person needs... ask. If they say they need space, give it to them. At the very least, they'll know you care."
"And that's really the important thing," Carter added. "Letting them know that you care and that you're there if they need you. Now, we'd like you all to take a few minutes to write down the things you like people to do when you're feeling down, or hurting, or scared. If you'd like to discuss them with your classmates after, or with either of us, please feel free but this is not a necessity."
Fjord lifted a shoulder.
"Don't even need to write 'em down if you're not feeling secure about the possibility of sharing," he replied. "Just think it over, at least." A pause. "And help yourself to the cookies and fish, of course."
It was pretty much the expectation, now, wasn't it?
They had promised cookies in their class description—the fish was merely them adapting to their students' needs!
"Maple bars today," Carter said cheerfully. "Help yourselves!"
"Sometimes," he said, at length, "things happen that'll leave the people around you a little bit out of sorts." Not that he was listing examples or anything, but he figured people could use their imaginations. "Today, we're going to talk about giving people what they need in order to recover from whatever those things might be."
Carter was also frowning, but it was very much because he was restraining himself from fussing over Fjord.
"It's important to consider what they need, rather than what you want to do," Carter said, smiling at the class, since he didn't want them to think both their teachers were unsettled today. "Your inclination might be to rush in with hugs and offers to talk, while what they might need is quiet and space to think. And vice versa, leaving someone alone when they want to talk could just make things worse. It's about tailoring your reaction to their needs—though, of course, they are also responsible for communicating their needs to you in the first place."
"Not that they'll always necessarily be able to," Fjord noted. "Sometimes, when a person isn't doing well, reaching out to other people seems like the most difficult thing in the world. Like they're an inconvenience, or they'll only be throwing themselves out there just to get hurt even more. It can be a complicated thing, trying to figure out what the best way to approach a hurting friend might be." He paused a moment. "I suppose the same thing applies here as it does anywhere else. If you aren't certain what a person needs... ask. If they say they need space, give it to them. At the very least, they'll know you care."
"And that's really the important thing," Carter added. "Letting them know that you care and that you're there if they need you. Now, we'd like you all to take a few minutes to write down the things you like people to do when you're feeling down, or hurting, or scared. If you'd like to discuss them with your classmates after, or with either of us, please feel free but this is not a necessity."
Fjord lifted a shoulder.
"Don't even need to write 'em down if you're not feeling secure about the possibility of sharing," he replied. "Just think it over, at least." A pause. "And help yourself to the cookies and fish, of course."
It was pretty much the expectation, now, wasn't it?
They had promised cookies in their class description—the fish was merely them adapting to their students' needs!
"Maple bars today," Carter said cheerfully. "Help yourselves!"
Re: Consider!
It simply read: Words of encouragement. Smiles. Just to have someone to listen, but not always. Sometimes it's just good enough to know that someone is simply there
It made him smile a little as he read it over after he'd written it down.
...and then carefully directed his next sneeze away from the paper.