fandomhigh | Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [10/23].

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survival skills

Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [10/23].

Class in the actual classroom today! Rosa kind of dug how it felt almost novel at this point, but she was sitting on the desk at the front of the class when everyone came in, and automatically assuming that anyone not there that morning was probably some sort of animal. Because that was a thing now. That she just straight up assumed, and, goddammit, she'd been here way too long.

"I'm sure everyone's had a real interesting week," Rosa snorted slightly, "so this week, we're just going to sort of....talk about stuff. Bounce ideas off each other. It's a pretty diverse class, today's topic is something that can really benefit from experience, and also pretty freaking important to survival, and that's diversions. Distractions. What to do if you actually get caught," maybe a little late for that one there, Diaz, "what to do to avoid getting caught, or sometimes even what to do when you have to work a distraction or diversion into your plans.

"Classic examples might include," she ticked off her examples on her fingers, "a creative use of weapons, well-timed explosions, smoke bombs, liberal use of packets of fake blood. Other people and/or animals can be helpful, butt they're also unpredictable and untrustworthy. Chaos is your friend. I know a guy who managed to snag someone's phone through a carefully orchestrated swarm of grown men dressed as giant Royal babies. It was ridiculous, but you can bet that guy didn't even realize his phone was gone in the few moments it took for him to get the information he needed and returned it."

...she should really just do a whole class on Peralta's Halloween heists. The material was gold, and she was sure half these kids would eat it right up.

"But I want to see what you guys come up with, especially once you start bouncing off each other. I'm going to give you a few scenarios, and we're going to figure out good ways to provide a distraction or diversion in those scenarios. And then I'll let you guys come up with some situations of your own, see what you can come up with."

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Causing a distraction.

Vette

Peebee

Lana Beniko

Paris Geller

Sabine Wren

Yang Xiao Long

There isn't much of one today, but Rosa'll field any giant Royal baby questions you may have.

"So, scenario one, and I'm prefacing this by saying that most of these are obviously hypothetical and nothing any of you are actually going to ever do, we're just getting ideas, BUT, scenario one is you...left something in a teacher's office after hours and it was important enough that it couldn't just wait until morning, so you decide to go in there and get it. Not knowing your teacher has a proclivity for correcting papers late at night because he's...I don't know...an alcoholic insomniac, but either way, there he is, and there you are, rifling through the papers on his desk because you can't find what you're looking for. What do you do?"

Vette put up her hand. She had a very important question here.

"How drunk is it safe to assume he's likely to be?"

"Not very," Rosa answered without hardly any hesitation. "Not yet. Enough for a nice loose buzz, but most of the drinking's still ahead of him from the bottles clinking around in the bottom drawer."

Vette hummed a little, tapping a finger to her chin thoughtfully for a few moments.

"Okay, so I can't bet on him stumbling around and not knowing me to see me." It wasn't like she looked anything like her classmates, after all. "Guess I have to get holographic evidence of the drinking on school property and blackmail the poor guy if I get caught, then. Shame, I bet it couldn't happen to a nicer person."

She was utterly shameless.

"Is what I left something he'd give me voluntarily?" Lana asked. "Is it only being there I'll be in trouble for?"

Rosa...hadn't put that much thought into some of these, though she supposed she should have expected these kids would be thorough. Which was good. They should be.

"No," she decided after a moment of thinking. "It's not something that should have been there in the first place, you're trying to get it before he realizes you left it there, so bringing attention to it'll only make it worse."

Lana nodded. "So, I'll convince him I wasn't there. If he's partly drunk already, a bit of suggestion should be easy."

Okay, it wasn't a distraction, but Vette's hadn't been, either, so hopefully that was okay.

"Alright, next one. Obviously Fandom specific, and topical, though maybe a day late and a dollar short for some of you." Rosa wasn't looking at any of you; if it felt that way, that was nothing but your own guilt and shame making it seem that way. "You just spent the last couple days as an animal," don't laugh at that, Rosa, karma has not been your friend lately, "and you're just out for a walk, no big deal, but that's when you change back and you're in the middle of the street with no clothes on, but there's a store with clothes right there, so you're all, hey, maybe I can just break in and borrow some clothes, but, oh, wait, there's a cop right there about to bust my naked ass."

Cribbing notes from real life? Rosa? Noooooo.

"What do you do?"

Vette considered this one very carefully.

"I mean, it's Fandom," she noted. "I could probably fake a gremlin bite pretty convincingly if I had to."

Having seen all of one before.

"That's...actually not a bad idea," Rosa said, sounding mildly impressed after considering that one, and her own experiences having been bitten before, and figuring it would be incredibly easy to just act stupid as hell and ridiculous to get out of something.

She was definitely going to keep that one in her pocket.

Lana...would probably just sneak back home. But this was about distractions.

"I knock over something heavy in the other direction," she said. "Maybe simulate a scream. Wait for the cop to go that way."

"Last one from me," Rosa offered, "you're in a public place with a lot of people. Let's say...a party. A fancier one, real classy, the kind with about three too many forks at the dinner table. You're schmoozing or whatever, when you happen to spot someone with whom you've got major beef. Like, the last time the two of you encountered each other, they pretty much vowed to end you on sight if they saw you again. And they're seeing you now. And they're giving you that look that makes you one hundred percent certain they're about to throw down, but....you know...it's a fancy party. With, like, people. Important people. Boss-like or romantic-interest type people in it."

Some of these details were coming off as weirdly specific, weren't they? But Rosa shrugged.

"What do you do?"

Edited 2018-10-23 11:46 (UTC)

Vette shrugged.

"I excuse myself. Take it outside. Make it clear that we aren't making a spectacle at the party, and if they try, it isn't me who ends up looking bad."

And then she'd shoot them. It wasn't like she carried twin blasters for nothing.

"That isn't usual here?" Lana wondered.

Yeah, this wasn't the first time Rosa was left wondering what the hell kind of school this one went to before.

"It's not, like, an every weekend kind or thing or anything," Rosa said. "Maybe, like, every two, three months or so."

Which was also not normal, Rosa, but okay.

School, heck; that was Sith life.

"I keep on doing what I am. I'm going to keep an eye on where they are and what they're doing, in case they start anything, but I'm not going to start anything. If they do, that's their problem. I'll be prepared."

And now Rosa would field it out to the class to see what kind of weird shit these odd little bad asses would have to offer.

"What else you got? C'mon, give each other a real challenge."

Who will insist that any further details on any particular scenarios are not relevant to the activity, but nice try.

Aaaaaand now I have to marathon all the B99 Halloween episodes again.

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Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [10/23].

Sign In - BABSG, 10/23.

Re: Sign In - BABSG, 10/23.

Re: Sign In - BABSG, 10/23.

Re: Sign In - BABSG, 10/23.

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Re: Sign In - BABSG, 10/23.

Listen to the Lecture - BABSG, 10/23.

Scenario One - BABSG, 10/23.

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Scenario Two - BABSG, 10/23.

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Scenario Three - BABSG, 10/23.

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Choose your Own Scenario - BABSG, 10/23.

Talk to Rosa - BABSG, 10/23.

OOC - BABSG, 10/23.