fandomhigh | Advanced Criminal Justice, Class 21, Period 1, 03.28.06

[OOC: Keeping with the low-impact lectures. Wheee. I may be slow to reply at work today, just FYI. Class Info Post.]

"Hello, class!" Tick said fron his normal position at the front of the room. "Remember, your projects are due next Tuesday. You'll have some time to work on them at the end of class, but today we go back to lecture and discussion as well."

"Today we'll be talking about private investigators. PIs. Private eyes. Private smurfs," Tick said to cover up any potentially dirty interpretation of a popular nickname. "Gumshoes. Among many other names. The profession of Holmes, Spade, Magnum, and Addison. I'm talking about the sometimes noble, sometimes skeezy, always interesting, world of private detecting."

"PIs often work for people in court cases for a number of purposes. Maybe they're checking to make sure a witness or defendant is on the up-and-up. Sometimes they're checking to see if a person with a signifcant other has another other that is in some way significant. And sometimes they're called upon to solve the big crimes that the police just can't figure out."

"In a way, they're almost like superheroes, only without powers, with a salary, and with more frequent trips into the bad parts of town for non-evil-whomping purposes. They outthink evil. And that's keen!"

"For discussion today, please talk aboutyour views on private eyeing. Have any experience with them? Seen them enough on television to know what's up? Are you one. and if so, do you have any stories to share? After this discussion, you can jump into your teams for the project if you need class time to work on them."

"This week's metaphor is umbrellas. And for extra credit, please come up with two more nicknames for private investigators. IF you get suggestive with the private smurves, though, you can only do so for one of the nicknames. So keep it clean!"

[OOC: Veronica has offered to answer questions about PIs.]

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Parker cracked up.

"'Size matters not?'" She tried, imitating him. "Are you serious?"

"That's what I'm taught," Anakin said. "Atoms, planets, it's all the same in the Force."

He grinned. "And when you're being taught this by a little green guy with a stick that he doesn't have a problem whacking you with, you believe it."

Parker suddenly remembered the semi-cute gremlin pontificating on the holo, and shook her head in disbelief. "I'll take your word on that. I suppose Carter or Crichton could explain that, but I think I'm stuck on how a skycraper is a lot bigger than a pebble. Ah well." She grinned, then sobered. "Hey. You keep saying Marvin was a Sith. What makes someone a Sith, and not a Jedi?"

Anakin's face was serious. "Sith are evil," he said. "Not just regular dark Jedi evil, which is scary enough, but an entire philosophy devoted to using the Dark Side of the Force, to warp the galaxy to serve their own interests. Jedi use our knowledge of the Force to aid others. Sith use it to help themselves." He swallowed hard. "They're the stuff of nightmares and were thought to have been destroyed thousands of years ago. But they're back--and there's only ever two of them, so they're impossible to track down--and we can't find them, figure out what they're up to, or stop them."

He fiddled with his pen. "Not a great time to be a Jedi."

"Born in time of conflict, he is...." Parker bit her lower lip. "I see. What do they want the galaxy to be? I mean, you've never said much about your home, but I certainly didn't get the impression it was in bad shape right now."

"A galaxy without Jedi, for one," Anakin said. "And one where they're in charge. The combination of the two is probably not great for the rest of the galaxy."

He yanked at his braid. "We're having some political conflicts, but it's all on paper and about trade negotiations and sovereignty issues and accountability. Certainly nothing to want to destroy the fabric of society over."

He sighed. "And the Dark Side clouds the Force, making it hard for us to see the future, try to figure out what they're planning. It makes the Masters nervous. They're not used to not seeing what's coming."

Parker folded her arms, looking interested. "So, what, they're used to always knowing what's coming? Always knowing what to do?"

"In general, yeah," Anakin said. "The future is always in motion, of course, but there are some events that just seem to be destined." He sat up straighter, subconsciously imitating Obi-Wan. "This is a good example between the Jedi and the Sith. The Jedi see the future and accept what will happen. The Sith see the future and try to change it, control it."

"By that definition, I'm a Sith, Anakin. I'm doomed. A vending machine is going to fall on my head."

Anakin snorted. "Hardly." He sighed. "I'm not explaining this well. To be a Jedi, you let go of everything--attachments, fears, all of it--and just allow what is going to happen to happen."

He stared at the desk. "I'm not a very good Jedi. I'm haven't gotten used to that part."

Parker actually thinks he's explaining it fine, she just thinks the Jedi are nuts. But that's not a good option to say. "You have dorky clothes by my standards, dorky hair, and you don't even own a droid that you made when you were a kid. And you're only-- god, you're what, eighteen? Jeez, what the hell do they want?"

Leaving aside those 'other' attachments, oh yes.

"Eighteen, yeah. Although not here. My birthday's in a couple of weeks here, but I turned eighteen when I was at home. Weird time thing," Anakin said. "And they don't want anything. This is just what it means to be Jedi." He concentrated and the pen on his desk lifted up and began spinning. "It's what I am. Who I am. If it was easy, everyone would do it."

Parker pouted. "I still say that some of those rules are ridiculous. What does helping people have to do with wanting nothing? Isn't it about wanting the right things? Marvin wanted order, a clear view of Venus, and to explode the Earth. It's only that last one that got him in trouble."

Anakin frowned. "So we're not bribable," he said finally. "So we're focused on the needs of others, rather than what we want. So, ultimately, we aren't holding onto to our own sense of self too hard when a sacrifice must be made."

He smiled. "Yeah, that last one will get you every time. Exploding planets is bad."

"I still think they're extreme as all hell." She shook her head. "Isn't wanting to not want something, wanting something? How the heck do you pull that trick off?"

She grinned. "Right. Because that's always a huge risk anyway."

"I haven't figured it out," Anakin said ruefully. "Obi-Wan doesn't seem to have a problem, though."

He yanked at his braid. "Yeah, even where I come from, not a lot of people blowing up planets. Um, ever." He thought about it. "The amount of firepower you'd need...and the reverberations in the Force of all of that life disappearing?" He shuddered. "Not good."

Parker thought about that, not quite getting the Force connotations, but still... "Which leads back to the way Karmic Darwinism works. That much disturbance? Has to have one hell of a reverb back to smack the creator of it, don't you think?"

"For destroying that many lives?" Anakin pursed his lips in thought. "Yeah. The galaxy's largest vending machine."

"So, yay, the Force. Which is evidently the direct evidence that the vending machine metaphor works." Parker looked delighted. "And in Marvin's case, that's to keep getting that little Roman Centurion head blown off. Or floating off into space. I love it."

Anakin looked surprised. "Wow. That actually works. Go us."

Advanced Criminal Justice, Class 21, Period 1, 03.28.06

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