fandomhigh | Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [09/18].

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survival skills

Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [09/18].

Rosa was leaning on the front of the desk at the front of the classroom when everyone filed in, eyes on her watch, waiting for the exact second she could start this class because that would put her closer to the exact second she could end it. So as soon as the time hit, she got to work, whether the students were there and ready or not.

"Today's a two-fer," she said. "Two lessons for the price of one. First lesson is," and she lifted up the small survelience camera she'd hidden for last week's class, "no matter where you are and what you're doing, odds are, someone's probably watching you. Last week, it was me, and at least one of you," a nod to Gratuity ~~assuming she's there~~, "knew that right off the bat. Don't know if it was smart giving yourself away that you knew, but at least you know that I know that you know. More of you picked up on the second lesson, though, or maybe you just didn't care or you're vegetarian or whatever, but the second lesson is that you probably shouldn't just take random food that's lying around from disreputable sources."

Rosa, you were the town detective. You were supposed to be the opposite of a disreputable source.

"So congrats, those of you who took sandwiches, you're now terribly sick because let's just pretend those sandwiches were actually poisoned. And now it's these chuckleheads who didn't take the sandwiches that have to heal you. Bet you're really wishing that sandwich killed you now, huh?

"Okay, so it's actually three lessons today, obviously no one's poisoned, and that doesn't even factor in to what we're doing today, which is going to be some basic first aid skills that any bad ass bitch should know to survive. Sandwich takers get to be the practice dummies; sandwich abstainers get to figure out how to dress theh sandwich takers' imaginary wounds."

Because they couldn't do fake victims. Rosa trying to figure out the Danger Shop would likely result in her trying to shoot the control panels and then no one would be having a good time.

"Three skills we're going to go over: cleaning and dressing a wound, how to make an emergency splint, and how to treat various degrees of burns. If you know how to do all of these already, good for you, help out your classmates, or whatever."

So she went through what to do with each instance, demonstrating on herself where applicable, and then shrugged. "All three of these things could perminently injure or disfigure a person if you don't do it right, but, you know, no pressure or anything. If you have any further questions, you can go bug Dr. Yang. She actually finished medical school."

The oh-so-sweet smile she tried there lasted a flash of a second. "Okay, sandwich takers, that side of the room. Sandwich abstainers, pick out a taker and get to work on one, two, or all three of the different procedures. I didn't bother checking if it all balances out or anything, though, so, I don't know, group up if you have to."

If you honestly thought Rosa actually cared, you clearly hadn't been paying attention.

And she could almost respect that.

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Like you've been wounded.

Sabine Wren

Vette

Gratuity Tucci

Lana Beniko

Peebee (who is being wounded by terrible puns here)

Paris Geller

There actually kind of is one. And while her presentation probably needs work, the information's pretty solid.

It wasn't that Vette felt proud of herself for not taking the free food, exactly. She had spent long enough waffling on the subject that she really had no place to gloat either way.

She did still feel a little vindicated, though.

And she was paying close attention to the first aid lesson. Kolto didn't come cheap, this would all be good to know, just in case.

"What if we tested the food for poison before we ate it?" Lana asked.

Because she definitely knew better than to take food without taking precautions.

"...did you actually go and get the food tested for poisons?" asked Rosa after a moment of trying to decide whether she was impressed or if she thought that was ridiculous.

It was mostly actually impressed, if she were honest.

"I tested it myself," Lana said. Of course she had; her previous instructors had actually been homicidal on occasion. "I wouldn't have eaten it otherwise."

She shrugged. "I can still play a victim for this week, but I'd hate for you to think me an idiot."

"What if we left in the common room and then hypothetically poisoned other people instead?" Paris asked.

From last week:

Takers: Gratuity, Paris, Lana
Abstainers: Vette, Sabine, Yang

If you didn't ping in either way last week, feel free to mod/pick whatever side you'd like.

Find someone, or a couple someones, to work with on dressing wounds, making splints, or treating pretend burns with all the supplies you'll need provided. Or just wrap your friend up in gauze like a mummy, Rosa doesn't care. She'll think you're stupid, but she won't care.

So, who got to be Vette's victim today? She glanced at the sandwich takers with a raised eyebrow and a faint smirk on her face, looking to see whose eye she caught first.

Tip had all sorts of disagreements with Rosa's premise for role assignments this week. Mostly because she'd checked the food before she'd taken it. And she was pretty sure Sparkle would agree with the idea of taking free food when it was available. Had Rosa ever had to live off stolen vending machine food for weeks?

But also, Rosa was kind of terrifying, so Tip was just going to play nice and come up with as many horrifying injuries as she could for her partner to treat.

"Hey Vette, wanna bandage your big sib?"

It didn't hurt that, in a school environment, the odds that a teacher was actively trying to kill you were probably low...

"Wouldn't miss it," Vette laughed, giving Tip a little grin. "Took the sandwich, huh?"

"And checked it before I ate it," Tip said, a little defensively. "If she wants to dump a whole mess of money on food, I'm not going to waste it."

Vette quirked a little smile.

"I've spent too much time on Nar Shaddaa," she decided. "I was pretty tempted, though. I can't deny it."

"Oh, there," Tip said with a slight smirk. "Yeah, I don't know where that is. I'm assuming it's, like, a smuggler's planet or something."

She'd spent enough time around Kanan to know that people from his neck of the universe tended to talk about planets rather than cities or countries. And that each planet tended to have, like, one primary economic or environmental feature that distinguished it from anywhere else.

"It is literally nicknamed the 'Smuggler's Moon,'" Vette laughed, shaking her head and reaching for the bandages. "So... good guess, there."

"I've spent a fair amount of time with a guy from the seedier side of where you're from," Tip said. "It's possible that I just assume every place in your world is either a smuggler's den or a massive, domineering city-state."

"Well, there are also backwater jungle planets that haven't really been populated yet," Vette offered. "Planets that are just big warzones, Hoth..."

Hoth was noteworthy all on its own.

"Is that a planet or a curse word?"

"Practically both," Vette laughed, making a 'gimme' gesture at Tip's arm so that she could start working on a splint. "Biiiig frozen wasteland, populated mostly by tauntauns, wampas, and anyone stupid enough to fly close enough to Hoth to crash on it."

So, White Maw pirates.

"Yep, don't know what wontons or tampas are, either," Tip said, cheerfully and deliberately messing those terms up. "Sorry."

"Probably both equally smelly," Vette decided, working her way through a decent splint without even really giving it much thought. "One's more likely to eat you, though."

However she'd been chosen for this, Lana was fine with being dressed by whomever needed to do it.

She shrugged and looked for someone to experiment on her.

Yeah, she's here. What'd ya want?

These morning shifts will be the death of me.

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Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [09/18].

Sign In - BABSG, 09/18.

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Listen to the Lecture - BABSG, 09/18.

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Class Activity - BABSG, 09/18.

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Talk to the Teacher - BABSG, 09/18.

OOC - BABSG, 09/18.