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fandomhigh2018-09-17 09:18 am
built_fjord_tough) wrote in fandomhigh2018-09-17 09:18 am
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How to Make Friends & Influence People | 4th Period | Monday
When the class assembled once again in what was one of a multitude of classrooms full of comfortable cushions this semester, they would... probably not be terribly surprised to find their teachers there. Since that was their job, and all.
Fjord, for his part, was looking to be in decent spirits, standing a little off to the side with his arms over his chest and a wry smile on his face.
"Hello again, class," he greeted, inclining his chin at the lot. "This week, Pastor Carter and I figured it would be... relevant... to discuss what to do upon learning that another person has vastly different views on a topic than you might happen to have, yourself."
Look, it had come up a lot this week.
It probably came up a lot most weeks, truth be told, but this was the week that they were addressing it.
“There’s nothing inherently wrong with holding different views,” Carter said softly, his smile rather less wry than Fjords but no less genuine. “Especially here, where everyone comes from very different worlds. It would be hasty to assume everyone would hold the same opinion as you.” His smile went rueful. “Though it is easy to make that mistake.”
And rather understandable, even!
“But that’s why it’s important to know how to handle yourself when something like that comes up,” Carter continued. “Getting angry and stomping off in a huff might satisfy you, but it won’t do much to build a connection.”
"In some situations, coming to an agreement on a different point of view might not be immediately possible," Fjord noted, looking from Carter back to the class. "Perhaps it isn't a discussion you would like to have with an audience, or perhaps tempers are running too hot for somebody to be able to clearly articulate what it is they feel might need to be said. In most cases, simply saying 'you're wrong' won't change anything. If you're going to have a talk about where your disagreement lies, it's best to approach it not only with your own facts straight, but with a cool head and an open ear. It's possible that the person you're speaking to doesn't have the same context that you have, and being able to accurately pinpoint that fact and address it might be useful."
“And even if you do address the context from which each person is coming from,” Carter said, glancing at Fjord with a question in his eyes. “It’s still perfectly fine to agree to disagree. The important thing is to make sure that that disagreement doesn’t cause bad blood between each other out of a misunderstanding.”
Admittedly, Carter was against bad blood all around, but he was trying here.
Fjord glanced back at Carter for a moment, and hiked a shoulder up in a little shrug.
"Sometimes, bad blood is inevitable," he noted. "Not everybody is capable of coming around to another person's way of thinking. Not everybody necessarily even wants to try understanding it. And in some cases, 'agreeing to disagree' can be a dangerous option as well. It's important to be able to recognize those situations when they come up. Making peace is fine. It's an admirable goal in fact. But not when it comes at the expense of your well-being or anybody else's."
He paused for a moment, and then added, a little more gently, "Sometimes, people really are simply looking to cause others pain."
And… and those were Carter’s shoulders slumping. Just the thought of that upset him, it really did.
“I should hope none of you are looking to deliberately inflict pain on each other,” Carter said quietly, to the class. Even accepting that people could be like that was a work in progress, so the idea of his class being like that… please, no. “Today, we would like you to offer up an opinion that you hold, then pair up and discuss it. Only you must try to support the opposite of your opinion in a peaceful manner.”
"It doesn't have to be anything groundbreaking," Fjord noted. "You can step in and tell somebody that you don't like keeping company with cats. Person two is welcome to explain the virtues of cats all they like. It isn't going to change that you've got a cat allergy."
That was a wonderfully nonspecific example. Honest.
"Pair up, disagree, try not to bring it to blows. Should be easy."
Carter looked deeply pained. “Please don’t let it come to blows.”
Fjord, for his part, was looking to be in decent spirits, standing a little off to the side with his arms over his chest and a wry smile on his face.
"Hello again, class," he greeted, inclining his chin at the lot. "This week, Pastor Carter and I figured it would be... relevant... to discuss what to do upon learning that another person has vastly different views on a topic than you might happen to have, yourself."
Look, it had come up a lot this week.
It probably came up a lot most weeks, truth be told, but this was the week that they were addressing it.
“There’s nothing inherently wrong with holding different views,” Carter said softly, his smile rather less wry than Fjords but no less genuine. “Especially here, where everyone comes from very different worlds. It would be hasty to assume everyone would hold the same opinion as you.” His smile went rueful. “Though it is easy to make that mistake.”
And rather understandable, even!
“But that’s why it’s important to know how to handle yourself when something like that comes up,” Carter continued. “Getting angry and stomping off in a huff might satisfy you, but it won’t do much to build a connection.”
"In some situations, coming to an agreement on a different point of view might not be immediately possible," Fjord noted, looking from Carter back to the class. "Perhaps it isn't a discussion you would like to have with an audience, or perhaps tempers are running too hot for somebody to be able to clearly articulate what it is they feel might need to be said. In most cases, simply saying 'you're wrong' won't change anything. If you're going to have a talk about where your disagreement lies, it's best to approach it not only with your own facts straight, but with a cool head and an open ear. It's possible that the person you're speaking to doesn't have the same context that you have, and being able to accurately pinpoint that fact and address it might be useful."
“And even if you do address the context from which each person is coming from,” Carter said, glancing at Fjord with a question in his eyes. “It’s still perfectly fine to agree to disagree. The important thing is to make sure that that disagreement doesn’t cause bad blood between each other out of a misunderstanding.”
Admittedly, Carter was against bad blood all around, but he was trying here.
Fjord glanced back at Carter for a moment, and hiked a shoulder up in a little shrug.
"Sometimes, bad blood is inevitable," he noted. "Not everybody is capable of coming around to another person's way of thinking. Not everybody necessarily even wants to try understanding it. And in some cases, 'agreeing to disagree' can be a dangerous option as well. It's important to be able to recognize those situations when they come up. Making peace is fine. It's an admirable goal in fact. But not when it comes at the expense of your well-being or anybody else's."
He paused for a moment, and then added, a little more gently, "Sometimes, people really are simply looking to cause others pain."
And… and those were Carter’s shoulders slumping. Just the thought of that upset him, it really did.
“I should hope none of you are looking to deliberately inflict pain on each other,” Carter said quietly, to the class. Even accepting that people could be like that was a work in progress, so the idea of his class being like that… please, no. “Today, we would like you to offer up an opinion that you hold, then pair up and discuss it. Only you must try to support the opposite of your opinion in a peaceful manner.”
"It doesn't have to be anything groundbreaking," Fjord noted. "You can step in and tell somebody that you don't like keeping company with cats. Person two is welcome to explain the virtues of cats all they like. It isn't going to change that you've got a cat allergy."
That was a wonderfully nonspecific example. Honest.
"Pair up, disagree, try not to bring it to blows. Should be easy."
Carter looked deeply pained. “Please don’t let it come to blows.”
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Lecture!
Cookies!
Disagree! Agreeably.
Civilly.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
She also rather desperately wanted to send a few fellow Sith to this class.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
"Okay. Hit me."
Most of a second went by before she amended, "Figuratively, I mean. Not literally. Unless you're of the opinion that everything should be literal."
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
She tapped a finger against her chin and drawled, "Though that does beg a different question where we might disagree: what would you say counts as people who need to be hit?"
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
Yes, the double entendre did occur to Peebee, which was why she paused to snicker.
"I gotta say, I can't really disagree with that, either, and I can just hear some matriarchs having a fit about the idea right now. So going off of that, do you draw the line at just hitting, or, you know, hit 'em kind of terminally?"
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
She cocked her head at Peebee. "Your matriarchs wouldn't approve?"
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
"Me personally, I'd do it if I had to. We're not doing well at this disagreeing thing, are we?"
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
Though, really, considering the class, he couldn't imagine it any other way, as he looked around for a partner with what he hoped was a soft, inviting smile.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
Re: Disagree! Agreeably.
...just let him have his tall jokes, okay?
Talk to the Teachers!
Re: Talk to the Teachers!
Re: Talk to the Teachers!
But he was willing to talk, of course.
OOC!