Creative Weaponry; Tuesday, 1st Period. [01/23].

[special_rabbit]

Hopefully, everyone had gotten Amaya message that class would be meeting in the town today, in Turtle & Canary. And if they didn't get the message, hopefully the note on the danger shop door would clue them in. As well as the note on the classroom door. And if none of those messages got through, well, then, was this really the class they should be taking?

When (hopefully) everyone seemed accounted for, Amaya was waiting at the counter and greeted them with a nod. "Good job last week," she said. "I've gotta say, I'm pretty impressed by some of the stuff you guys came up with to get out of those cells. I'd feel pretty good in a situation where I ever wound up kidnapped by goblins with any of you, but I've got to admit. Lots of great escape plans, a little light on the weapons, for the most part. So today's going to be a straight-up building day. No wacky scenarios to distract you, just a wealth of materials to help get the old noggin," she tapped her forehead lightly, "going on some ideas. We'll have a few of these days this semester, working with actual real materials, since it's definitely a bit different with working with a computer program that pretty much allows for nearly anything. Follow me."



She jerked her head and waved her arm as she moved toward the produce section of the store, which had been roped off with a sign making it clear that the section would be closed for the duration of the class period. But she moved the ropes to let them in.

"And here you go! Here's your materials. Fruits and vegetables. Now, we got a pretty good stock here and some weird things from places I ain't ever heard of because of the nature of the island, so there's plenty of variety. Obviously, it's okay if the weapons don't stand up to the final test. Today's class is more about creativity than practicality, because I sincerely hope you're never in a situation where you need to make a weapon out of a head of cabbage and a pumpkin, but, hey, you never know.

"Now, pelting fruit and vegetables at people is a time honored tradition, usually reserved for really bad stage performers and jesters, but not exclusively. I've heart tales of sieges where the sieged gathered up all their rotting and useless food and catapulted it over the walls into the enemy in the hopes that the refuse would chase them away. It didn't work, the enemy just trebucheted it right back, but you've got to admire their effort. I want you kids to take it a step beyond just lobbing bad fruit, though. I'd like to see you construct something as much like a regular weapon as you can get with a bunch of produce. Even better if it works like a weapon, too, but it's not necessary. Remember: creativity today, not so much practical.

"A few things. First, you're not restricted to just produce. Anything used to hold, carry, bind or restrict the produce is fair game, too. Crates, boxes, rubber bands, twine, plastic bags, you can use any of it, but the produce needs to be the main feature of the weapon. But please do not disassemble any of my shelving units or refrigerated cases." She could easily fix 'em, sure, but who had time for that and parts were expensive. "I've also provided some simple tools, some knives for cutting and trimming, hammers, nails, wrenches, if you need them, but I don't want to see anyone attaching a pair of scissors to a rutabaga. That's just not going to cut it."

She paused with the small hope for a reaction, because she had actually punned! But she wasn't expecting much of one.

"Also, nearly all of this produce is pretty benign, but, like I said, we get this stuff from all over the multiverse. So to make things more interesting, I'm enlisting the help of one of these guys." And she pulled from her pocket a juicy red tomato only with a very angry looking face on it. "This is a Rotten Tomato."

"Ehhhh," the tomato sneered loudly, "you ain't so hot yourself, toots. When was the last time you washed that pocket, anyway? Smells like feet in there! Who puts a tomato in a pocket, anyway? Were you born in a barn??"

The faint strain in Amaya's smile might have suggested that she was already starting to regret this. "Compliments of the guy I bought this store from. He claims they're from the Land of the Green Isles back home, which is just ridiculous because everyone knows the Green Isles are a legend. But, anyway, he'll be running commentary on your projects today, because I don't know what else to do with him, and I guess if anyone knows fruits and vegetables, it's gonna be a fruit that's commonly mistaken for a vegetable."

"NYeaaaah!" said the tomato.



"So have at it," Amaya said. "You've got full range of this section of the store for a good portion of the class, and then Apu and I will roll out some dummies I've got in the back room for testing. Have fun, try to really push yourself into thinking of something interesting, and please don't mind the tomato. Feel free to grab a free Squishy on your way out the door, too."

[[and here comes the ocd is up! ]]

Comments

Sign In - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

Fruit or vegetables?

Re: Sign In - Weaponry - 01/23.

[onefootoutthedoor]

Peebee

Re: Sign In - Weaponry - 01/23.

[refused2berescued]

Uma, daughter of Ursula

Re: Sign In - Weaponry - 01/23.

[intotheout]

Gratuity Tucci

Re: Sign In - Weaponry - 01/23.

[notamascot]

Kaylin Neya

Listen to the Lecture - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

You're having weapons class in a produce section! Neat?

Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

Create a weapon with produce! It's Fandom, so the food is pretty moddable, from your garden variety apples to out of season avocados to iceberg lettuce that's actually made of ice!

You can use some of the other things in the section, too, like twine or boxes or plastic bags, but the food needs to be the feature. And there are tools to use, too, but they can't be featured in the final product (with the exception of nails and screws and other connecty bits).

And then there's the tomato. "You think that'd gonna work? What? Is that a potato, or your braaaain?"

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[onefootoutthedoor]

Okay, so Peebee got a little carried away -- she couldn't help it, something as off the wall as this really got her imagination going -- which is how she ended up with a bolo made out of beets and twisted up plastic bags, stalks of celery whittled down into something like throwing knives, and, for close quarters work, a bludgeon that was actually an oversized leek with an angry looking turnip stuck to the end. (It wasn't a sentient turnip, but somehow its lumps and scars made a very convincing face. One that, she theorized, you wouldn't want to see coming at your face quickly and unexpectedly.)

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

"Ayyyyyyy," said the Rotten Tomato, "great job, you managed to find a turnip whose face is almost as ugly as your own! And with that leek, that weapon almost smells as bad, too!"

Amaya was going to spend a lot of this class facepalming in the background.

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[onefootoutthedoor]

"What can I say?" Peebee replied airily, flourishing the leek-and-turnip bludgeon at the Tomato with a bright (and clearly sarcastic) smile. "I took inspiration from you."

Peebee. No.

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

"Yeah, they do say imitation is the highest form a' flattery," the Tomato snorted, "but you took it to the next level. I might as well retire my Ugliness Title, 'cause, hey, everybody! There's a new champion in town!"

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[intotheout]

Tip's mind had gone straight to food allergies and poisons when she saw the materials they had to work with this week, but -- again -- she was pretty sure that wasn't what the teacher was looking for. That didn't stop her from spending a little while putting together little sachets of chopped onion, lemon juice, and the hottest peppers she could find, all stuffed to bursting in plastic bags for some chemical warfare.

Since her other idea was to carve carrots into shivs, she figured having something a little more creative on hand wasn't a bad idea. . . .

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

Amaya actually thought the little veggie bombs were brilliant, and Tip was right that she'd think the carrot shivs were a little unimaginative, but she wasn't planning on saying much about it.

The Tomato, however...

"Hyeeeaahhhh," he said, "I thought you's guys were makin' weapons, not salads! What're you gonna do, stab some bunny rabbits?"

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[intotheout]

"Are the bunny rabbits attacking?" Tip asked, testing the tip of her shiv with her thumb. Hmmmm. Maybe she could make several of them and attach them to -- something -- for some sharp, veggie-based brass knuckles. "Because that has totally happened here before."

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[refused2berescued]

Uma started with things she knew. She was good with weapons, even if fresh, non-spoiled vegetables were still a surprise. The first five minutes of class were spent just going through and poking at the produce, feeling the textures and getting to know what she was working with.

Okay, so first, a slingshot, made from celery stalks bound together so they wouldn't break, using elastic bands she'd found holding several of the vegetables together. Another elastic band served as the tubing and she gathered a handful of prickly pears to serve as ammunition.

Next, she grabbed some literal-ice lettuce, breaking off the shards and shoving them into an orange, creating something like caltrops. Next, she made a whip, braiding stripping the leaves off of corn on the cob. It would be better if she'd had time to dry them, but a multiple-strand braid made a decently thick whip, the end nailed into one of the cobs. The rest of the cobs were cut into sharp points and shoved through the length of the whip.

And last she grabbed several durian fruits. She couldn't think of anything else to do with them, figuring their spiny rind and horrible smell would was all the weapon it really needed.

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[intotheout]

"Wow." Tip was maybe staring a little at that corn-whip. "You're kinda scary when you want to be, huh."

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[refused2berescued]

That was the first compliment Uma had received at this school that made sense. "Thank you!" she said proudly. "It's not going to be much use as a weapon the way it is, but it was fun to make."

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

"Whattya tryin' ta do?" called the Rotten Tomato when Uma was poking and prodding at all the produce. "Tryin' to get her to toss all of it out? It can't possibly be good now that you've gone and touched all of it!"

Re: Work on your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[refused2berescued]

"More for me then," Uma said, not at all bothered. She tossed an apple up into the air and caught it, taking a large bite. "Try harder."

Test your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

As promised, Apu and Amaya rolled out some of the test dummies so that the kids could see how their weapons held up in an actual attack situation.

"Although if anyone feels like using the SquishyBot for their testing," Amaya added, not at all subtle in her suggestion, "I can't say I'd mind."

Re: Test your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[misshapen_spark]

Yang smirked, stepping up with her two watermelons that she'd slid her hands into, letting her aura slide into and around the fruit.

Yeah, sure, she had some rather large leeks stuffed in her belt in case she needed to get stabby, but this should be fine.

And then she went at the test dummies.

Re: Test your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

"Wow," murmured the Tomato, after a really long, hard debate with himself whether or not he would, but he was Rotten. He couldn't have stopped himself if he tried. "That's great. Now get one of those watermelons to put over yer head, an' we'd be all set!"

Re: Test your Weapons - Weaponry - 01/23.

[misshapen_spark]

Yang stalked towards him, with a grin that wasn't entirely sane. "I dunno, I think one would fit over YOU just about right!"

Yang, no.

Talk to Amaya - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

Who will likely spend a good portion of the class wondering on the morality of turning a sentient tomato into a ragù .

OOC - Weaponry - 01/23.

[special_rabbit]

I freakin' love my canon.