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First Aid for Fandom | Thursday, period 1

Class had been tasked with meeting in the Danger Shop again, and Hannibal greeted them as they arrived. "Welcome. And well done last week. This week, we move on to actually helping those you find. Since part of our determination in triage was whether or not they were bleeding, we're going to find out today how to help if they aren't."

He called up an unconscious human body. If it looked a little like Frederick Chilton, well, the man was a perfect example of dreadfully average humanity, and deserved any indignity he suffered.

"The technique we will learn today, I should mention, was developed for use on human beings. Similar things may work on other species, but you will have to know the location of their heart, lungs, and breathing orifices. If you think you may have occasion to offer help in future, you might want to ask them while they are conscious.

"This technique is called CPR, which is the abbreviation for cardiopulmonary resuscitation. A human's body tissue requires oxygen to live. As a simplified explanation, the lungs extract oxygen from the air, and blood carries this oxygen throughout the body. If the brain does not get oxygen, it begins to die. Brain damage is largely irreversible, so even if the person is later revived, they may have permanently lost function.

"The primary object of CPR is to ensure continued brain function by giving it the oxygen it needs. The secondary object may be to restore enough of a heartbeat that medical means can restore their pulse, or to enable them to begin breathing on their own. However, remember that whatever you may have seen in the media, CPR is unlikely to make a difference on its own unless followed by medical attention. CPR must continue until the person has their pulse restored or is declared dead."

He waved them all forward to observe the body.

"The most important part of CPR is chest compressions. If you feel confident enough, you may attempt to use breathing as well. We will discuss both methods."

He went over them, then brought out a bag valve mask. "If you want to try the breathing, but are unable to do so yourself, you can use one of these." He explained their use, too.

"So," he said, "show me both methods. We'll go over them and I'll help your form. And feel free to use the mask if you would rather not breathe for him yourself."

Hannibal would certainly understand that.

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Ready to breathe!

Peridot

Summer Smith

Khadgar

Kaylin Neya

Hopefully he's given you enough information, but feel free to ask questions.

Guess who was little and green and tapping out notes furiously on her phone.

Guess.

Summer might have also been tapping on her phone during the lecture, but it sure as heck wasn't to take notes. It was to go through the motions of being bored and texting people that didn't exist because this phone had none of her actual contacts on it, although she didn't know that.

Give CPR, both with and without breathing.

Peridot was pretty sure she could handle the chest compressions without accidentally damaging the human further. So far as Gems went, she was kind of on the weak side.

A lot. Peridots weren't made for strength any more than they were made for powers, after all, so there would be no accidental chest breaking today.

She also had no idea how much her inhalations and exhalations in order to form words compared to those that a human being required in order to live, and so she was making a reach for that bag, just to be certain she was going to do this correctly, in properly measured portions.

Hannibal nodded at her form. "You see, in some ways the human body is a very logical machine." He chuckled. "It's only when you begin to deal with humans as a whole that the logic falls apart."

Peridot nodded at that. She seemed far less out of her element today than she had been last week.

"Then it's simply a matter of me coming to understand how the machine is calibrated," she decided, looking thoughtful. "That shouldn't take me too long. The pulse has a certain strength and rhythm, as does breathing..."

"Precisely," Hannibal said. "I have many anatomy books in my library, if you'd like to learn more, or I imagine the school library has some as well. You should be able to determine the usual ranges and functional parameters of human systems."

"I have noticed some in the library," Peridot agreed with a little nod. "Perhaps I ought to go looking further. For all I know, it might not be all that different from Gem structures when I get right down to it after all."

It was so, so different from Gem structures.

"Well, it is very different from the structure of nonsentient gems," Hannibal said. "But I have no idea how different your structure is from nonsentient gems. Apart from the obvious point that yours allows for sentience."

"The structure of the Gem itself isn't all we have to consider when creating new Gems," Peridot pointed out, her tone a little wry. "We do have bodies, after all."

Case in point, then one she was using to squeeze a breathing bag for the patient, here.

"They do have to meet a certain standard, and there are a surprising number of structural similarities, considering we come from a completely different galaxy."

Hannibal frowned slightly. "I thought that your body wasn't actually part of your self, but a construct."

"It is," Peridot replied, "but it's a construct that reflects the quality of the work put into creating the Gem it's projected from."

She paused, and then added, "Some Gems can control what they look like. I can't. I am what I was made to be. And the fact that these constructs of ours share so many similarities with your species is... uncanny, really. I mean, our scent sponges are even in the same place."

Scent...

"Ah," Hannibal said. "You mean what we call noses?" He tapped his own. "It is quite intriguing, since you mention it. Many of the species from other worlds are remarkably similar. Do you know how Gems decided upon their forms?"

Peridot shook her head a little.

"I never exactly asked," she replied. It had never really occurred to her, at that. "We're the most efficient forms for our functions, I suppose."

Most things boiled down to efficiency with 'Dot.

"And yet Gems did not evolve, as near as you can tell." Hannibal pondered. "Perhaps they saw other forms from various worlds and intentionally developed what they perceived to be the most useful traits of each species for each sort of Gem that might need them?"

"... Maybe," Peridot replied, though her tone was dubious. "But that doesn't take into consideration that Gems have a sort of... default form. If we've been poofed and have to re-form, we start at that, and then cycle through every other variation on that form we've taken until we settle at whatever we take next. So there's room for improvement, but only to a certain degree. And straying too far from that default or rushing a regeneration can end... poorly."

"So, when you re-form, it isn't automatically in the precise form you were before being...poofed?" Hannibal asked.

"It can be," Peridot replied, thoughtfully. "The last time... the only time... I ever did, I returned to pretty much exactly as I was before my body sustained the damage. It might be something that Gems get better at with time and experience. Homeworld Gems don't tend to stray far from their original forms. But I've known other Gems who have."

"Do they stray in order to become better adapted to their environments?" Hannibal asked.

"I think mostly they stray to become better adapted to themselves," Peridot replied, thoughtfully.

That seemed very astute. "Can you give me an example of that?" Hannibal asked.

Peridot shrugged for a moment, pausing to consider the human equivalents for Gem terms she was more familiar with.

"... Hairstyles," she offered. "And... clothing. Gems who have lived on Earth might regenerate with appearances that better fit the... style... of their surroundings? To fit the... era...? Or to reflect their personal tastes."

Hannibal thought about it and nodded. "That makes sense." He smiled. "Fortunately, you fit here fine without needing that."

Because Fandom.

"Here," Peridot agreed. "Most of the time. Once the new students stop telling me to stop being green."

She rolled her eyes at that one.

Hannibal raised an eyebrow. "Somebody actually said that?"

That was rude.

"I believe she thought it was a... costume?" Peridot wrinkled her nose a little. "I tried to point out that I wasn't the only green person on the island, and that just made her more upset."

It likely didn't help that the other green person that Peridot had pointed out at the picnic had head tentacles.

Hannibal made a moue in distaste. "Hopefully she will learn to deal with the island's selection of people soon."

"She seemed... better... in class last week," Peridot admitted after a pause. "Once she accepted that I'm not exactly from around here."

And, in fact, came from a violent dictatorship.

"I was preparing myself to kick her, though. Just in case."

"Ah, good." Hannibal nodded.

About her being better? About Peridot preparing to kick her? Pick one.

Peridot was going to choose to believe that he meant both.

She gave a little knowing nod of agreement, satisfied with that.

There was inherently a problem with the whole idea of a classroom setting for this sort of thing with Summer, robot version or otherwise. In a crisis, she knew what to do. In a crisis, she was always one of the first people to try to do something, which was sometimes helpful, sometimes not, but she was never indecisive or inactive if shit was really going down. But here...in a hypothetical situation that was false and in an academic setting where her apathy was already amped up, she found it really, really hard to care, even if it was Dr. Lecter's class.

So she looked significantly uncomfortable with the idea of getting close to a grossly life-like body of a persons he didn't even know, as well as with the idea of effort itself, all things visual on her face, which seemed about two seconds away from complaining. But complaining took effort, too, so she just waffled for a bit before reaching for bag valve mask and showing off at least that method, in a spectacularly unimpressive, unenthusiastic way.

It was either that, or her programming would have her get way too into it, but it was almost as if her programming couldn't get past the fake part of it, which just made her start to subconsciously question the whole point of all of it. Like, what if none of it matter? What if...we were all fake? What was even the point?

...Someone maybe just needed another pumpkin spice latte.

"Is there a problem, Summer?"

Hannibal wasn't going to put up with that much apathy in his class.

Hopefully, Hannibal had a screwdriver on him, then, because Summer's hardware seemed to be stuck on apathetic teenager mode. Maybe it was all the Ace of Base this morning; must have fried her system or something.

She shrugged. "No," she said, with a sigh that suggested otherwise. "Not really. Whatever..."

"If that's the case, then perhaps you can give this class your full attention."

"Oh, right, sure," said Summer, rolling her eyes. "Because, like, his life is totally actually on the line. It's kind of hard to feel a sense of urgency when it's all, like, totally fake. Like, how do I know you're not fake? Maybe I'm fake. Maybe, like, everything in this entire dimension is just fake."

"Are fake things less likely to kill you?" Hannibal asked.

This was Fandom.

Khadgar was always a little taken aback by how accurate the Danger Shop could be, and the clarity of the unconscious man in front of them was just one example. He was apprehensive about the chest compressions at first, worried that he might hurt the man, but after a bit, he got the hang of it and felt better about applying more pressure.

"Good." Hannibal nodded. "Remember," he told Khadgar, "broken ribs are a common side-effect of CPR, but they are much easier to heal from than brain death."

He's here!

Huh. CPR has changed a lot since I certified in college.

That was way too many years ago, shush.

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First Aid for Fandom | Thursday, period 1

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OOC!