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fandomhigh2017-01-31 12:26 am
vdistinctive) wrote in fandomhigh2017-01-31 12:26 am
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Home Ec, Tuesday, Period 1
Class met in the Danger Shop today. If Eliot spent part of the class staring suspiciously into the corners, well. Last time he was in here, it was trying to kill everyone. Still, it was either this, the school's actual facilities, or his own house, and his house had people recovering in it and the using the school facilities just sounded mean. Also, the school janitor creeped him out.
Today, you see, they were learning how to clean bathrooms.
The Danger Shop set up looked rather like the hallway outside a pair of locker rooms you might find at a slightly seedy spa or gym. There were buckets, brushes, brooms, and mops along the walls, and two racks of various cleaning products opposite the locker room entrances. Inside were numerous toilet and shower stalls, as well as sinks and full size tubs. Most of it was more dingy than visibly dirty, though a few of those stalls were downright disgusting.
What fun would it be if he didn't give them a challenge?
"Right." He clapped his hands once and nodded to a full stock of supplies in the corner. "Cleaning. 'Round here you probably have to clean up after yourselves at least a little in the dorms, in your rooms and in the common room, if you don't want to be known as the asshole who left week-old chicken alfredo in the bottom of the sink. But I'm pretty sure you're not cleanin' out your own bathrooms in there. If you end up livin' alone, you can get away with wallowin' in your own filth a little, but I promise you, even the dirtiest among ya will reach a point where you don't even want to look at your own shower. And then you're gonna want to at least be familiar with what you can and can't throw on it without poisoning yourself."
He pulled out a stack of handouts. "So we'll start there, shall we? Here's a list of cleaning combinations to avoid. Number 2 is arguable. You're not going to hurt anything by mixing baking soda and vinegar, unless you're tryin' to pack 'em into a closed container. In some cases, like unclogging a drain, the bubblin' action they mention there is actually what you're going for. But in most cases, you're just gonna be wasting your time with those two in combination." Eliot pointed out the last paragraph on the handouts. "I want y'all to especially remember this bit: bleach doesn't go with anything. Seriously. It barely even goes with bleach. If you're gonna use it, water it way down, and make sure you rinse it off completely. Best case scenario if you don't is weird spots on your clothes. Worst case . . . well. Poison gas ain't any fun."
Eliot nodded to the two entrances behind him. "That's why we've got two bathrooms goin' over here. This one," he pointed to the bathroom on the left, which had a big B on the wall over the entrance. "Is the bleach room. There's instructions in there on how to best use it. This one," he pointed to the one on the right, which had a G over the entrance, "is for the interent's favorite 'green' cleaning products. Again, there are instructions to follow inside." He held up a hand. "In both cases, the thing that's really going to get these places nice and clean is elbow grease." A beat. "By which I mean hard, repetitive scrubbing and work, not, like, an actual grease that comes from or is used on human elbows."
Things he'd never thought he'd have to explain. This school.
"So pick a side, grab some supplies, and get to work. I wanna be able to see our faces in that tile by the time you're done."
Today, you see, they were learning how to clean bathrooms.
The Danger Shop set up looked rather like the hallway outside a pair of locker rooms you might find at a slightly seedy spa or gym. There were buckets, brushes, brooms, and mops along the walls, and two racks of various cleaning products opposite the locker room entrances. Inside were numerous toilet and shower stalls, as well as sinks and full size tubs. Most of it was more dingy than visibly dirty, though a few of those stalls were downright disgusting.
What fun would it be if he didn't give them a challenge?
"Right." He clapped his hands once and nodded to a full stock of supplies in the corner. "Cleaning. 'Round here you probably have to clean up after yourselves at least a little in the dorms, in your rooms and in the common room, if you don't want to be known as the asshole who left week-old chicken alfredo in the bottom of the sink. But I'm pretty sure you're not cleanin' out your own bathrooms in there. If you end up livin' alone, you can get away with wallowin' in your own filth a little, but I promise you, even the dirtiest among ya will reach a point where you don't even want to look at your own shower. And then you're gonna want to at least be familiar with what you can and can't throw on it without poisoning yourself."
He pulled out a stack of handouts. "So we'll start there, shall we? Here's a list of cleaning combinations to avoid. Number 2 is arguable. You're not going to hurt anything by mixing baking soda and vinegar, unless you're tryin' to pack 'em into a closed container. In some cases, like unclogging a drain, the bubblin' action they mention there is actually what you're going for. But in most cases, you're just gonna be wasting your time with those two in combination." Eliot pointed out the last paragraph on the handouts. "I want y'all to especially remember this bit: bleach doesn't go with anything. Seriously. It barely even goes with bleach. If you're gonna use it, water it way down, and make sure you rinse it off completely. Best case scenario if you don't is weird spots on your clothes. Worst case . . . well. Poison gas ain't any fun."
Eliot nodded to the two entrances behind him. "That's why we've got two bathrooms goin' over here. This one," he pointed to the bathroom on the left, which had a big B on the wall over the entrance. "Is the bleach room. There's instructions in there on how to best use it. This one," he pointed to the one on the right, which had a G over the entrance, "is for the interent's favorite 'green' cleaning products. Again, there are instructions to follow inside." He held up a hand. "In both cases, the thing that's really going to get these places nice and clean is elbow grease." A beat. "By which I mean hard, repetitive scrubbing and work, not, like, an actual grease that comes from or is used on human elbows."
Things he'd never thought he'd have to explain. This school.
"So pick a side, grab some supplies, and get to work. I wanna be able to see our faces in that tile by the time you're done."
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