fandomhigh | How to Win Friends and Influence People, Friday, Period 1

Kanan was holding the book again when class started this week, flipping through its pages and just... smirking.

"Okay, this week we're going to pull it back to something a little more personal," he said, glancing up from the book and speaking in an amused tone. "This week's chapter deals with making a happy home life. And I have to say, this week's outline is my favorite in the whole damn book. Makes me actually want to follow the list."

It was that last point that did it for him. Easily.

For Bob, too, honestly. What? He was dead, not...well, anyway.

"Seven rules for making your home life happier," Bob intoned. He wrote them in the air for the class to read as Kanan read them out loud.

Don't nag.

"Not that it isn't often effective," Bob added, "but it certainly won't win you any friends."

Don't try to make your partner over.

"Not a bad way to get yourself punched, or at least find yourself sleeping on the couch for a while," Kanan added, shrugging.

Don't criticize.

"Again," Bob said. "Very useful. In moderation, I suppose."

Give honest appreciation.

"This one pays off in all kinds of fun and interesting ways," Kanan offered. He was wearing a bit of a lecherous smirk.

Pay little attentions.

"Goes with the last one," Bob said, equally smirky.

Be courteous.

"I'm admittedly not sure how this one is much different from the last one," Kanan noted, "except in ways that I should probably leave to the sex ed teachers to explain instead."

"Well, be nice," Bob said, shrugging. "Not necessarily little things."

"And this is what we keep Bob around for," Kanan added, grinning. "Answering the real questions."

"And keeping you from being deafened," Bob added pointedly.

"That too," Kanan allowed.

Read a good book on the sexual side of marriage.

In response to that one, Kanan just smirked. A lot.

"I believe there are a few of these in the library, filed under 'romance,'" he noted. "I'm not sure if I'm supposed to encourage you to pick one up as homework this week, but to hell with it, I'm going to anyway."

"There are some really good ones," Bob offered. "I can give some recommendations if you like."

Was that weird? Probably. Then again - Bob.

"Homework aside, what about the rest?" Kanan? Still smirking. "Let's talk about all the little ways you can put that list to use in your home life, or... dorm life... or whatever it is you have. Your answers don't have to be sexual, of course. It can be something as simple as picking up after yourself so your roomie doesn't have to step on your underwear every morning, or accepting that no matter how much it disturbs you, they're going to wear that weird tunic with the furry pants and make stupid noises at your dog at the strangest hours of the night while occasionally pausing to chant over some... kind of rock."

Not that he had experience with this.

"Or occasionally listening when your...roommate...tries to give you advice to allow you to pay the rent or to save your own skin. Being nice and leaving books out for him to read. Not walking through his equations at inopportune times. Or polishing his skull from time to time."

It was possible that Bob had issues.

Okay, probable.

"All right," he told them, "talk."

[OOC: Open!]

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The ways you can exercise these points in your own home - or dorm - life!

Don't nag.
Don't try to make your partner over.
Don't criticize.
Give honest appreciation.
Pay little attentions.
Be courteous.
Read a good book on the sexual side of marriage.

... Some of these points might be more relevant than others.

"I find all of these quite useful," Lucille said. "In my time the last one would not be encouraged, especially not for ladies, but I have come to understand that is a serious oversight."

"Having a good handle on things like romantic and physical urges, and what those urges mean, is pretty important," Kanan noted, nodding. "Just so long as you're responsible about it. Reading doesn't hurt. Reading without thinking, on the other hand..."

Most humans weren't made to do the things people sometimes did in those books. Also, babies. Babies could happen.

"Your time was regrettably backwards in that respect," Bob said, not unkindly. "It's good you can see the value in something like that."

And he wasn't even being lecherous!

"Don't got a roommate here or at home," Ada said, "--but I dunno if I agree with 'don't criticize.' If'n someone's bein' a dumbass, pretendin' they ain't isn't gonna solve anything."

Kanan gave Ada a pleased little grin at that.

"You raise an excellent point," he agreed. "Hell, 'constructive criticism' is absolutely a thing, and it's an important one, too. Maybe that point should have been something a bit more like 'don't nitpick for nitpicking's sake' or something, instead?"

"Well, yes," Bob said. "But this isn't about solving things, it's about making friends. You can always criticise them later."

"This seems like a very general list," Ahsoka said eventually. "I'm not sure how useful it'd be in the specific."

"Well," Bob asked, "how would you think to apply it specifically?"

"Well, you'd have to pay enough attention to the person you were applying it to to know that'd it work," Ahsoka said. "And by that point you'd probably be better off just using sense instead of checklist."

Ahsoka don't go assuming people were sensible, you knew that wasn't true.

"Think of this as a sort of guideline," Bob said. "When you don't know much about the person, you can start here."

"Of course you'd have to take it and apply it to your own personal situation," Kanan noted, and then waved the book around a little. "And besides, this thing is one of the most backwards publications I've ever had the pleasure of holding in my own two hands. It's why Bob and I are mostly ignoring what's in here."

But neither of them could resist the part about the reading materials. Boys would be boys, even if they were non-corporeal, or ex-Jedi.

"There's some room for interpretation. Or to take it and ignore it entirely. Some people might not react well to honest appreciation. And, as Ada pointed out, not all criticism is bad."

Oh, Kanan, there was a version of you that was going to be judged so hard for things that weren't his fault.

"It also seems to assume that everyone using it is human," Ahsoka said. "And that humans all think the same."

That Kanan was going to be very confused. But he was an ass once, too, so he probably had it coming.

"Yeah, Earth book," this particular Kanan sighed, shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head. "I don't think the guy who wrote this was even aware that there are more sentient races out there than just humans. Hell, I don't think he was aware that not everybody out there is a socially awkward middle-aged man in a sexual relationship with a woman that he's presumably married to."

Which was another good reason to ignore most of what was in the book.

"I'd say you should read this thing to get a real feel for just how much poodoo is in here, but I had to read it once, after the office informed me I was teaching from it, and that was more than enough."

"They made you read it?" Bob made a face. "My condolences."

It was easy to dodge paperwork when you couldn't touch paper. And could disappear if people tried to corner you.

How to Win Friends and Influence People, Friday, Period 1

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