Magical Bestiary | Tuesday, period 2

[nuclear_snide]

"Equines," Bob said. "For some reason, there seem to be a lot of them about in various magical forms." Illusions of each appeared as he mentioned them. "The Black Horse, Pegasus, Hippocampus, each-uisge, yale, hippogriff, kelpie, nuckelavee, and of course, the unicorn."

He put on a look of long-suffering. "And what seems to have been forgotten in modern children's culture is that most of them want to kill you." He went over the history and characteristics of each. "Now, a practical demonstration." With a wave of his hand, the Danger Shop's classroom display made way for a twilit forest, a river running along one side. "They're all here, roaming about. Catch them, ride them, ignore them - but try not to die, even if it's only simulated."

Comments

Sign in!

[nuclear_snide]

...on horseback?

Re: Sign in!

[yogurtvore]

Blue Sargent

Re: Sign in!

[rhymeswithtable.livejournal.com]

Mabel Pines

Re: Sign in!

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante

Re: Sign in!

[cracksmostly]

Merrill

Re: Sign in!

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy Li

Re: Sign in!

[not_every_mage]

Anders

Re: Sign in!

[notamascot]

Kaylin Neya

Listen to the lecture!

[nuclear_snide]

Marvel at the illusions! Try to take in some of it.

Re: Listen to the lecture!

[rhymeswithtable.livejournal.com]

Mabel was vaguely interested at the mention of the pegasus, yes. In fact, she was a fan of horses in general. But when Bob mentioned the unicorn, she practically started vibrating.

YES. YESSSS YES PLEASE YES PLEASE PLEASE YES?

Re: Listen to the lecture!

[cracksmostly]

Well, excuse Merrill while she tried not to fall over and die from excitement.

And, you know, completely miss that whole bit of the lecture about creatures wanting to kill you.

Re: Listen to the lecture!

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy would have loved to find a unicorn, but depending on the myth, she wouldn't be able to even touch one, so...yeah. No unicorn for her.

But a pegasus. HELL YES!

Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

Play with the horsies...carefully.

Re: Try not to die!

[rhymeswithtable.livejournal.com]

There was only one thing in the world at that very moment that was actually higher on Mabel's list of priorities than a hot man. So when a kind of seaweedy-looking hot each-uisge in manly disguise started making handsome faces and winking at her, Mabel looked for a moment in appreciation, and then just settled for waving him a cheerful hello before setting off on a march into the woods.

She needed to find a mystical glade! She needed to be so pure of heart! No time for you right now, pegasus! Sorry, majestic-looking hippocampus! She'd give you a forwarding address to meet Mermando another time!

DID ANYBODY SEE HOW MUCH SHE NEEDED TO MEET EVEN A FAKE UNICORN RIGHT NOW???

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

Had Mabel even paid attention to the part about unicorns being deadly and feral?

Bob was very glad this was simulated.

Re: Try not to die!

[rebelseekspizza]

"Isn't a motorcycle called an iron horse or something?" Dante said, eyeing the horses. "Nope."

At least any unicorns were staying well away from him.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

"Is it?" Bob shrugged and filed the slang away for later; that was one he hadn't heard (the Morningways hadn't been the motorcycle type). "Well, I don't know of any widespread instances of enchanted motorcycles. Though in all the worlds, I suppose there's some somewhere."

Re: Try not to die!

[rebelseekspizza]

Honestly, it was entirely possible Dante was just making shit up. It wasn't like he particularly cared; he just had nothing with horses. Though a future AU version of him definitely wound up fighting a spectral one once, so maybe he should've been paying attention.

"Be pretty cool," he mused. "Motorcycle that can spit fire, maybe?"

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

"Don't motorcycles run on gasoline?" Bob asked (rhetorically, yes). "Why on earth would you want to add fire to one?"

Harry wasn't much of a comic book fan.

Re: Try not to die!

[rebelseekspizza]

Dante shrugged. "It'd look fucking cool."

He was a simple guy.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

Bob snorted. "Until it exploded. Then you'd be too busy burning to appreciate it."

Re: Try not to die!

[rebelseekspizza]

"Eh," Dante said, "I could take it."

The really sad thing was that he totally could, and it was really a matter of time before he decided to pick a fight with something in Bob's class.

Maybe if he unleashed those hell hounds.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

Bob gave him a look that was a little skeptical and very pained. "So could I; it doesn't mean I'm in a hurry to try. Besides, you wouldn't get very far on an exploded motorcycle."

Re: Try not to die!

[rebelseekspizza]

"Maybe if it explodes in the air," Dante mused.

Dante, not everyone had your way with gravity.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

"Are you going to jump it, then explode it? Or just fire yourself from a cannon?" Bob asked, torn between incredulous and resigned.

Re: Try not to die!

[rebelseekspizza]

"The first one," Dante said, "The second one is just fucking stupid."

Have some standards, Bob.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

"Of course. What was I thinking - the rest of it is so reasonable!" Bob sad facetiously.

Re: Try not to die!

[cracksmostly]

Merrill went straight off into the woods without delay, but careful not to lose the way oh wait who are we kidding she'll totally lose the way in search of a hippogriff.

It wasn't a griffon exactly BUT IT WAS RELATED. Though she'd have to come up with a different name if she found it and got to keep it (at least for a little while). "Feathers" was strictly reserved for her hypothetical baby griffon.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

Well, Bob wasn't certain how much the students were learning from this, but he certainly was learning quite a bit.

Mostly which of his students had any sort of self-preservation instinct.

Re: Try not to die!

[spin_kick_snap]

Kathy knew better than to try and catch a water-horse. Any variety of a water-horse, in fact. But she couldn't help but want to catch and ride a pegasus. Her belt could be a bridle, now all she needed was to find a well in the woods...

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

But Kathy, Bob had pegged you as one of the sensible ones!

Oh, dear. At least this place had safety protocols.

Re: Try not to die!

[spin_kick_snap]

One could only be sensible up to a point!

And she was avoiding the obviously deadly and feral ones! But yeah...pegasus. Especially since she could chase one down, at least before it took off into the air.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

At least it wasn't one of the most deadly ones? Unless you got thrown off mid-air, and...

Oh, Bob was just going to sulk about everybody's lack of common sense. Maybe he'd give you all hellhounds to play with next week.

Re: Try not to die!

[notamascot]

Oh no. She was totally staying as far away from the stupid horses as possible. Horses were sneaky and out to get you and would totally step on your feet or kick you if given half a chance.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

Oh, thank god. Because honestly, when Dante was the most sensible one so far...

"Good to see you've got the right idea."

Re: Try not to die!

[notamascot]

"Yeah. Horses? You can't trust 'em. Not even normal horses," Kaylin said with a shudder.

Re: Try not to die!

[nuclear_snide]

"Not a fan?" Bob gave her a curious look. "What sorts of transportation does your world use?"

Re: Try not to die!

[notamascot]

"Walking," Kaylin said firmly. And then sighed. "All right. If you're rich enough you probably have a horse and carriage. Or horses and a carriage. But I'd rather walk. It's safer."

Talk to Bob!

[nuclear_snide]

He is not playing with the horsies.

Talk to the TA!

[nuclear_snide]

When he pings in!

Re: Talk to the TA!

[not_every_mage]

Anders had been outrun by all the horses -- which was just as well, he thought -- so he spent a fair amount of the class period just exploring the woods, looking for interesting herbs and trying not to look like prey.

Re: Talk to the TA!

[nuclear_snide]

Bob sighed. "Well, at least you're fairly sensible."

If only by lack of speed?

Re: Talk to the TA!

[not_every_mage]

"And not a very good rider," Anders added, slightly apologetically. "Combine that with half the horses being either demons or partially fish, and it seemed just as well to let them be."

Re: Talk to the TA!

[nuclear_snide]

"That generally is the sensible thing," Bob agreed. "Though I was shooting for 'observe from a distance and possibly interact with very carefully'."

Yeah, not on Fandom, apparently.

OOC!

[nuclear_snide]

Many, many thanks to furnaceface for the class suggestion!