fandomhigh | BWI Airport, Portalocity Lounge

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!event: newbie shuttle

BWI Airport, Portalocity Lounge

It was That Time Of Year again. At BWI airport, they knew well that this was not the kind of thing you wanted to be asking questions about. So when a teenage boy showed up wearing a ratty long red-and-black coat, an expression that blazed hell and a large series of bleeding scratches on his face, well, they didn't ask. About anything.

Dante didn't mind. It meant he could walk into the nice warm Portalocity lounge and crash on one of the benches. Had to sleep off the day he'd had... yesterday? Was it yesterday now? Who cared.

By the time he jerked back awake about an hour later, the scratches had vanished and his expression had gone sleepy, though the ratty coat remained. He sat up, rubbing at his eyes. Guess he wasn't alone anymore, huh? Fine, whatever. "Who knew the public still showed up for transport?"

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Frank laughed. After a drink. "Alcohol poisoning? What, like drinking wine and having to deal with that taste? I mean, it's not ideal, but it's not going to kill you."

Eliot rolled his eyes. "Assumin' you're human, you know you're not actually immortal, right?"

"Of course I'm not, but I don't see what that has to do with liquor," Frank said.

"You ever hear the phrase 'too much of a good thing'?"

"Doesn't ring a bell and I don't think I can support the premise," Frank said thoughtfully.

"That's nice," Eliot said, voice almost as dry as those drinks Frank was serving himself. "Ain't gonna help your liver any."

"It doesn't need help, my good man. It's top of the line," Frank bragged.

"Not for long if you keep workin' it that hard."

"I hope you don't teach biology, because I don't think you understand how livers work," Frank said.

His liver was not like other livers. His liver was better.

"You ever seen a human liver, kid?"

Eliot had. Not that this made him qualified to teach anything about them.

"Who hasn't?" Frank asked. "Ever see a Sasquatch's kidney? They'e surprisingly dainty."

That wasn't the answer Eliot was expecting, but he'd been in Fandom too long to really be surprised. "Were you drunk or sober?"

Honestly, with the way this kid was tossing them back, either way could have led to hallucinations.

"Would you really want to see a Sasquatch's kidney sober?" Frank said.

"Depends," Eliot said. "On how it got out of the sasquatch."

"It's a long story and I don't feel like telling it," Frank said thoughtfully.

"A bigfoot tale short on details. Shocking."

"Oh, you've heard the story?" Frank asked, clearly surprised. "Because it was news to us that Sasquatches explode when they get electrocuted. And the cleanup was not pleasant. So if you ever see one by an electric fence, either tell it to move away or get out of there fast."

"I'll keep that in mind."

He really would, too. You never knew when you were going to go up against Big Foot.

"You run into a lot of that sorta thing in your time?"

"Only the one Sasquatch, but a surprising number of Skunk Apes," Frank said. "It was a family reunion."

"Those Florida things?" Because of course Eliot had researched American cryptids. "You a relation?"

"Nope, still human. Still not claiming to be anything but a mortal person. But I was sent to check out the reunion," Frank said. "They're pretty decent as far as monsters go, but their drink choices leave a lot to be desired."

They preferred skunky beer, of course.

"Well, there's no accountin' for taste."

"Or smell. Or sight. Or touch, really," Frank said. "When you get right down to it, only one sense survived the cup without mild trauma."

Edited 2015-08-29 02:27 (UTC)

He wasn't going to ask.

"The hell you talkin' about?"

Okay, he was apparently going to ask.

"Their beer was really that bad," Frank said with a shrug before taking a drink. "I would not recommend it."

BWI Airport, Portalocity Lounge

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