History of Poisons, Thursday Per 2

[glacial_queen]

Word had been sent around for students to meet in a Danger Shop, as well as a note taped to the classroom door (along with a handy map for the newbies), for those students who hadn't yet figured out email. Inside, the Danger Shop had been programmed to look like an elegant dining room, with enough chairs for each person to sit. On the table sat six pewter serving trays of different foods, a carafe of a deep purplish-red liquid, and a vase filled with lilies of the valley, but none of the chairs had plates in front of them. Their teacher sat at the head of the table, drinking a mug of coffee.

Hey, it was the Danger Shop. which mean it didn't count. If she wasn't supposed to be a role-model right now, her cup would likely have been filled with something a lot stronger.

"Welcome," she said, waving people in and gesturing for them to take a seat. "This is History of Poisons and I'm your teacher, Karla DiGlacia. Feel free to just call me Karla, I don't like standing on ceremony when I visit the island. I get enough of that at home. Anyway, welcome to our first class and, since it's Thursday, you probably all know what we're going to do today. You're probably all tired of introductions by now, but it's tradition." She shrugged then savored another mouthful of coffee. Oh, that was good stuff.

"Now, when it comes to history, poison has been around since our various ancestors first started poking at various fruits, vegetables, and berries they were able to gather. Not long after people discovered that eating the berries on that bush could kill you, poison has been used as a method of murder, execution, suicide, pest-control, sabotage, and even medicine, of a sort. Whether ingested, inhaled, or injected, all poisons effect the body in some harmful manner. That is, however, pretty much the only similarity among them. There are household poisons, industrial poisons, medical poisons, ...in other words, there's far more to the poisoner's art and its history than we can possibly go into in a single semester. We are going to focus mainly on plant-based poisons, both because they're the ones I am most familiar with and also the most likely to be universal, which is saying something when we're talking about all the different multiverses that touch here. It's not a guarantee, of course, but then again, nothing is."

Especially in a place like Fandom. "Since I'll be asking you all a few questions to learn more about you, it's only fair that I give you some information about me. Firstly, I'm not from this world, though I attended Fandom from my freshman year through graduation. My home is the Realm of Kaeleer, where I am the Queen of a Territory called Glacia. My people are called the Blood and we all have Craft, though most people around here call it magic. I'm what is known as a triply-aspected witch; I belong to the three different inborn castes. As I mentioned before, I'm a Queen, but that's not really relevant to this class, a Healer, which gives me a background in medicinal herbs and plants, as well as the Craft to Heal physical ailments, and a Black Widow, which is the caste of dreams, illusions, prophecy, mind-Healing and poisons." She was going to leave out the part where Black Widows naturally produced their own potent venom in a sac under their right ring finger nails. People could be so weird about that.

"But enough about me, back to the stuff that's really useful. Poisons surround us every day, moreso if you're from worlds or countries or times that are not as developed as America in 2015. It's not just the wrong unknown berry that can kill you, even foods you eat every day can be lethal if you eat them at the wrong time of year, or eat the wrong parts, or eat them when they haven't been prepared properly." She gestured to the items in front of them. "Several of these are poisonous, others are not. I'd like to go around the table and have each of you give me your name, class, and your best guess to what is the most poisonous thing on the table is. I'll tell you now, no poisons have been added, that's not something you have to worry about. These are all poisons you could stumble over in the wild. And don't worry if you can't tell apples from arsenic, just give me your best guess."

Comments

Sign In (01/08)

[glacial_queen]

Like your teacher has you sitting around a table of poison!

Re: Sign In (01/08)

[seeks_truth]

Cassandra Pentaghast

Re: Sign In (01/08)

[giveherahand]

Mara Jade

Listen to the Lecture

[glacial_queen]

Though if there's one day to not pay attention, it's probably today.

Re: Listen to the Lecture

[seeks_truth]

Cassandra listened with appreciation for the first half or so of the explanation. At least this class was useful.

... of course, then Karla started talking about herself, and suddenly Cass was sitting up and frowning.

Introductions & the Table

[glacial_queen]

In the center of the table is a vase of lilies of the valley; next to it is a large glass carafe of elderberry wine. The six pewter serving platters are in a ring around the vase and carafe. On one serving tray is a plate full of shelled almonds. The next has cooked quail, followed by roasted tomatoes. The next platter holds raw mushrooms, then a salad made from raw rhubarb, cucumber, and mint. The final platter held a giant baked potato, a fat pat of butter on top, its skin rather greenish.

"Your name, your class, and your best guess as to which of these is the most poisonous."

Re: Introductions & the Table

[seeks_truth]

"My name is Cassandra Pentaghast, I am called a sophomore, and my suspicion goes out to the mushrooms and the flowers," Cassandra said, "and you."

... She meant that metaphorically. Though finding out about the poison tooth wouldn't help.

Re: Introductions & the Table

[glacial_queen]

[I need to go to sleep but I couldn't NOT]

"I'm interested in your reasoning for all of those," Karla said mildly, giving Cassandra a raised eyebrow. "Especially the last. Because of my history with poisons, perhaps?"

...She was betting it wasn't the poisons.

Honestly, Cassandra! She was just your average, run-of-the-mill, very pregnant witch-Queen-Healer-Black Widow! What was to mistrust?

Re: Introductions & the Table

[not_every_mage]

Once the introductions had moved to the other end of the table, Anders leaned toward Cassandra.

"I should have guessed you'd be a noble -- and a religious one on top of it." Not that he had anything specific against nobles; the Theirin family was popular just then, and any noble-born mages Anders had met in the Circle got the airs knocked out of them quickly enough. But he wasn't surprised that someone as sheerly arrogant as Cassandra seemed had a right to stick an inherited title in front of her name.

Re: Introductions & the Table

[giveherahand]

Mara pointed to the mushrooms as well. "I'm Mara Jade, I'm a freshman, and mushrooms can be extremely dangerous. After that, the salad. You can toss almost anything into greens."

Hypothetically. Ahem.

"...I've heard," she tacked on.

Re: Introductions & the Table

[glacial_queen]

Another semester of Karla still not buying Mara Jade's 'I'm just an innocent' routine. ...Not that she was going to say so out loud, of course.

"Good to see you again, Mara," Karla said, offering her a smile. "Those are good guesses, very well-thought out. Would you like to guess what on the table are safe to ingest?"

Re: Introductions & the Table

[notacokeperson.livejournal.com]

When it was her turn, Karina shrugged a little. "I'm Karina Lyle," she said. "I'm a senior."

She gave the table another quick look.

"The mushrooms?" she guessed.

Re: Introductions & the Table

[glacial_queen]

It was a pity that Karla had to be all teacherly right now. Otherwise she'd be pointing at Karina and yelling, 'Headwiga!' before bursting into giggles.

Ugh. Responsibility.

She settled for a big grin and a small wave after Karina was done introducing herself. "A popular choice," Karla said. Which was exactly why she'd included them, yes. "Why do you suspect them?"

Re: Introductions & the Table

[not_every_mage]

"I'm Anders, a sophomore, and a mage from the same world as the charming Mistress Pentaghast," he offered mildly when his turn came. (And yes, he recognized the significance of the surname.)

That pointed aside offered: "And I'd say the lilies, because I know they can hurt cats and I'm not sure they're much better for people, and the salad. You can hide all kinds of things in salad. The wine too, for the same reasons. The mushrooms look fine to me."

Re: Introductions & the Table

[glacial_queen]

"Hello, Anders," Karla greeted. "Would you like the opportunity to tell me about how wicked and dangerous magic is, as well?"

It seemed only fair to offer him the option!

Re: Introductions & the Table

[seveninchmotto]

"I'm Isabelle Lightwood, and I'm a senior," Isabelle said, once the turn came around to her. "And my guess is the wine."

She'd barely paid attention to most of the introductions, but she'd paid enough attention to know she wasn't going to go for the mushrooms after everyone else.

Also, she was the type to poison wine.

Re: Introductions & the Table

[glacial_queen]

"Hello, Isabelle," Karla said, recognizing the girl from her own days as a student. "The wine? What makes you say that? And does your answer change if I remind you I didn't slip anything in?"

Re: Introductions & the Table

[notamascot]

"I am Kaylin Neya, a freshman, and I think... maybe... the flowers or the salad?" She wasn't sure about any of the things, but she knew flowers and herbs could be used to hurt or heal.

The Answer

[glacial_queen]

When everyone (or most people) have tagged in with their guesses, I'll post what's poisonous and what isn't, as well as the most poisonous item on the table.

Re: The Answer

[glacial_queen]

"In order from least dangerous to most," Karla said, once she'd had a chance to talk to people. "First we have the mushrooms and the elderberry wine. As several people pointed out, both have the potential to be quite deadly, but in this case, the mushrooms are of the perfectly edible piopinni variety and the elderberry wine was made correctly. However, raw elderberries are quite poisonous, along with much of the rest of the plant, so make sure that anytime you partake of elderberries, they're well cooked."

Were you taking notes, kids?

"Next, we have tomatoes served on pewter. For the longest time, people believed that tomatoes were poisonous, but that had less to do with the acidic nature of the tomato, and more because it is part of the nightshade family. The problem with the theory about the pewter plates is that lead poisoning can take years to develop, even when being eaten, and thus makes it difficult to pinpoint what food might have been responsible for the poisoning."

"Next, comes the baked potato. You should always avoid greenish potatoes, unless you're from a place where green potatoes are common and known to be non-toxic." Karla couldn't swear by what color alien vegetables would show. "From potatoes like those here, the green color comes from chlorophyll, which is fine by itself, but also indicates the presence of solanin, which your body processes into cyanide. If you have a potato with green spots, you can cut away those sections--and the skin--and be fine. If you eat it, however, you can get quite ill. On the plus side, you would have to eat several potatoes' worth to die; someone weighing a hundred pounds would have to eat roughly 16 ounces of a fully green potato."

"Next in toxicity, we have the quail and the salad. Quail have the ability to eat hellebore plants without a problem. The only problem is, the poison infuses its meat and makes it toxic to us. This is called coturnism. Depending on how it is cooked, the poison can be weak enough to only cause illness, or it can end up leading to death. With the salad, as several of you suggested, one bowl of leafy greens look much like another and it is very easy to substitute a benign plant with something far more dangerous. In this case, we have rhubarb, a plant that most people know is edible and so may think nothing of eating. However, only the stalks are edible; the leaves are poisonous. This is where it gets interesting, however. While it takes about ten or so pounds of rhubarb leaves to kill you, you only have to eat a single leaf to become very miserable. Rhubarb is at once very toxic and yet, generally non-fatal."

Weren't plants awesome?

"Of all the foods on the table, the almonds are the most deadly. These are bitter almonds, which offer a far more almond-y flavor than their sweet almond counterparts, but also a healthy dose of cyanide. Even just a handful or so of these nuts can kill, and less than that can permanently damage kidney functions. The same exact poison can be found in peach and apricot pits, as well as apple seeds. And since most people, don't know that the almonds they eat have been processed to remove all traces of cyanide and may happily partake of raw, untreated almonds. Be careful of any almond trees you find in the wild; it's nearly impossible to tell a bitter almond tree from a sweet one and the difference will almost certainly kill you."

"But even the almonds are not the most poisonous item on the table."

Talk to the Teacher

[glacial_queen]

"Also, odds are very good that I'll be missing the next two classes," Karla said, when class was almost finished. "I've prepared a movie for next class and the one after that will be taught by the woman who taught me poisons. That being said, I'm looking for a TA or two, so if anyone is interested, feel free to talk to me after class."

She paused and added, "You can also stay and talk to me, even if you don't want to be a TA. I'm always open for questions."

And until then, she was just going to cling to her mug of fake coffee and pretend that it was real.

Re: Talk to the Teacher

[furnaceface]

After class, Jono was peeking his head in through the doorway. He'd been in the school today anyway, thinking maybe he'd get some work done in his office, but really, he couldn't resist.

//You know I'm going to tell you you're bloody insane for being here today, right?//

He said these things with love, Karla.

Re: Talk to the Teacher

[notamascot]

Kayla smiled as she came up to Karla. "I would be your TA again if you want me to."

She didn't touch Karla, that would have been rude, but her forehead furrowed while she looked her over, then nodded. She wouldn't question why Karla was still here when the baby was so close, in Elantra most of the women continued with their normal tasks right up until the baby came. Still she was relieved that all seemed to be well.

OOC

[glacial_queen]

Feel free to hit me up here for questions! If, for some reason, more than two people want the TA spots, Ye Olde RNG will decide. But, don't worry, the TAs will NOT be responsible for the next two classes; Karla will be out having a baby, but I'll be around!

Re: OOC

[never-dull.livejournal.com]

Hannibal guesses Karla, too, but from him it's a compliment and flirting! :D

Also, eating other people is very dangerous if you don't know what you're doing. *solemn nod*