fandomhigh | Sex, Dating and Self-Confidence [Tuesday, Period 2]

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Sex, Dating and Self-Confidence [Tuesday, Period 2]

"Good morning, darlings," Irene said sunnily, perched on her desk as usual. The blue question box was still there, but now it was joined by last week's fishbowl of condoms, which still invited everyone to take a few. "Last week, we discussed the basics of sex -- Tab A into Slot B, and what happens in your body biologically, and how to be safe about it. With the clinical side out of the way, we get to tackle the fun stuff today -- what sex looks like for you."

Well. That was probably enough to strike fear into half the class, right?

"Not explicitly, of course," she added, waving a hand. "While I welcome discussion, no one here is going to be penalized for not sharing what gets them going, specifically. No, today, we're going to talk about a shamefully much-neglected topic -- foreplay."

"Foreplay," she began, "is really loosely defined as 'anything leading up to sex that gets you or your partner in the mood. It could be anything, but we're going to start with the basics." Irene passed around a packet of information, talking as she did so (at least in part to help alleviate any mortification that might be going on.) "These are the universally-acknowledged male and female erogenous zones, which basically means that we become sexually aroused when touched there. But, that being said, this is a general guide -- if you're turned on by people touching your elbows, more power to you. Sex has almost no universal constants, and that's part of the fun of it. But a general rule of thumb, as far as foreplay goes -- start with what makes you feel good -- and odds are, if you're human, you're susceptible to at least a few of these erogenous zones -- and see how your partner responds."

"Now," Irene said, facing the class again and smiling as she set aside the spare handouts. "That's just physical foreplay. There's also emotional, and mental." Which was her favorite, but she wasn't going to be quite that forthcoming with her class, no. "There are people who can and do become sexually aroused without ever touching their partner. Emotions can play into this, of course -- a love note might make you tingly all over, for instance, and that might be enough. But then there's the power of suggestion. A whisper in someone's ear over dinner, a build of anticipation. Why do you think sending provocative photos and sexts has gotten so popular? It's a form of foreplay." She clasped her hands together, looking as though she was about to break bad news. "Much though it might shock you, flirting is a form of foreplay, even if you're theoretically keeping it innocent."

"With all that in mind, today's class is going to be fairly discussion-based. I have here some articles for you to take a look at -- or, if you've seen these sorts of lists before, feel free to bring that knowledge to the table. Take a look at them, and I want you to critically think about why articles like this exist. If you have ever seen a woman's magazine, in particular, there's nearly always a headline on the front about 'ten moves your man will love in bed!' or something like that -- why do you think that the publishing industry thinks we as a people need so many tips? Are they doing us a service, and providing us with more ideas to please our partners?" Considering some of the items she'd seen on some of these lists, she did not really think they were all great ideas, no. "Are they preying on insecurity and trying to sell more magazines? And what do you think would happen to someone who tried to follow a list like that, to the letter, with their partner?"

She spread the articles out ~~and feel free to go look for your own Cosmo-style lists, guys~~, smiling. "We'll talk at the end of class. Feel free to take notes, by the way, if any of these catch your eye."

She hesitantly glanced up at the ceiling, just in case -- she remembered last week, about this time. "And you may work in pairs or groups, if you'd like, " she added, when she wasn't doused with water, just for something to say.

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Like it's a reading day! Kind of!

And read over that extensive Wikipedia page that I didn't look at this week, either, so sorry if there's dental surgery on this one too.

(...though I'm going to be really worried if there is.)

Find your own insane lists of MOVES TO DRIVE YOUR PARTNER WILD!!!! or whatever, if you would like! Feel free to compare the WTFy ones with a friend, and maybe pocket the ones you find interesting.

The answer is pretty obvious, yes, but the goal is just to get you kiddies thinking.

Who is not covered in ice water this week! Yay!

I actually have only given those lists the most cursory of glances, because I'm not clicking any of them at work, but as far as I can tell they're relatively work-safe as far as graphics go but maybe still don't read this one at work if you don't want the words 'foreplay' or 'erogenous' in your search history!

Johnny Storm

So much reading. Johnny skimmed for a bit before his mind wandered off. But he thought that was fair. After all, if flirting was a form of foreplay, he was pretty much a foreplay expert. He might even put it up to fiveplay.

Raven Darkholme

More reading.

In practiced fashion, Johnny was prepared to claim to be reading the articles when he was really sneaking looks at the pictures of whoever the actress on te cover of this issue was.

Ichabod Crane

Kathy Li

Ichabod had by now realized that this class was always going to make him terribly embarrassed. He did his best not to let it show, and carefully studied the handout on erogenous zones. He also did his best not to think about what he was reading in any way other than strictly theoretical.

Kathy was dutifully reading and trying not to blush herself into unconsciousness. None of these tips were precisely new, but this was the first time she'd ever read them with the supposed intent of finding things she thought she might enjoy.

Yup. All the blushing. Ever.

Oh, the articles. They were quite explicit, and using expressions that Ichabod had to guess what they meant. And there were pictures! Ichabod got quite distracted for a while by the photos. And then he found a suggestion which was, if not respectable, at least not going to ruin a woman's reputation.

"Exchange erotic letters?" Not that he would ever dare suggesting that to Celia.

"Well, a few reasons, I think," Kathy said shyly, after raising her hand. "The obvious reason is to encourage people to buy the magazine, but that brings up the question 'why do they sell?'. And I think they sell because, according to society, women are supposed to be sexually exciting and adventurous with their partners, but not have too much experience at the same time. Because double standards, yay."

She made a face.

"These kind of lists give women an anonymous place to get new ideas, make sure they're not weird for liking something, and to talk about sex and sexuality--all while framing it around their partners. In a way, it encourages women to take ownership of sex, but without 'not in a trampy way,'" she said, complete with air-quotes. "I mean, I might not be saying it right? But you find a lot more 'how to please your partner' lists than 'how to please yourself' lists, even though the latter do, umm, exist."

Tumblr. She could keep talking like this if she pretended she was on Tumblr.

"It seems that an interest in these matters combined with a fear of being inadequate has remained fairly constant since my time," Ichabod commented. "The difference is it is now spoken of explicitly, and I gather, is used to sell these publications."

"Very insightful, Kathy," Irene said with a grin. That was pretty much her version of giving a gold star, yes. "That's quite a positive way to look at it, and I tend to agree -- framing it as 'do this to please your partner' allows women, to whom these concepts are primarily marketed, to take control, as you said. I think there's something to be said about how they generally incorporate some level of surprise, too -- it allows women, particularly in heterosexual relationships, to spring something on a boyfriend or husband that they might not have been bold enough to try without the caveat of 'I got the idea from Cosmo.' There's something very liberating about it, you're right."

"There's a strong element of preying on insecurity, yes," Irene agreed, nodding. "One of the foremost things to consider, particularly coming from your perspective, is that even if it doesn't seem like it, women are still generally viewed as less sexual beings in this time, and publications that are targeted at female readers often incorporate lists like these to sort of both entice via taboo, and to circumvent it."

"Sales," Johnny answered simply. "They want to at least make you think that you're going to learn something new and exciting."

"But I have a question. Who writes these things, and how? Do you think they're, like, experts and have tests to see if those moves will actually drive your man wild? Or do they just find people to write these articles who are creative and go 'This sounds sexy and interesting!' but they have no idea if someone's going to shatter a hip?"

It would be a sexy shattered hip, but a shattered hip nonetheless.

"I almost feel as though it's like Mad Libs with some of these," Irene confided. (Sexy Mad Libs, of course, but Mad Libs nonetheless.) "'Try sticking your noun in his noun!' 'Maybe send him an adjective pic of your noun while he's at work!' And so on. So I'm pretty sure that unless something here really catches your eye, most of this so-called advice can often be ignored."

So, yes, more the latter than the former.

Elsa of Arendelle

Alana

They had magazines like this on Landfall, too, and Alana flipped through hers with a blase expression pasted on her face. You never wanted to look shocked by anything in them, even if you were.

But at one page, she let out a burst of genuine laughter. "Oh, my god," she said. "Who's going to do that with a donut?"

Edited 2014-09-09 22:40 (UTC)

"Yeah, what everyone else said," Alana agreed. "They do it to sell magazines. Plus, maybe they hire people who are really into sex and are obsessed with sharing everything the figure out about it. Writing a list in a magazine's less likely to get you arrested than, like, coming up to people in the street."

Joker Moreau

Most of it was pretty obvious or pretty silly, sure, but Joker jotted down a few notes, all the same.

"Is there going to be a test?" he wondered out loud. "Will it be a practical exam?"

"People like lists," Joker pointed out. "Its easier to go through a checklist than to experiment and explore and just see what happens. Also, apparently, people come up with some wild stuff and feel like sharing." He shrugged. "And I'm a little confused why so many things that start with 'have sex' are showing up in lists of foreplay, but maybe my dictionary's busted."

Eleanor Lamb

Eleanor was reading the articles and wondering if any people actually did things like this. Just "I know, tonight I'll surprise him by ______"

Eleanor was trying not to stare at Joker, but she was.

Look, something in how he suggested 'experiment and explore' sounded very enticing. As in, was he busy this afternoon, enticing.

She was absolutely not going to say any of that and was going to stare back at her own desk now. Honest.

Kira Yukimura

Kaylin Neya

Joker wasn't actually sure why Eleanor was staring at him. "What?" he whispered. "What did I say?"

Eleanor turned pink, trying to direct her attention back to her desk as quickly as possible.

"Nothing," she whispered back. "Really."

Could it just -- be like that? Exploring, experimenting, touching, playing?

She was turning more pink. How thoroughly unhelpful.

"Okay," Joker answered, with a little smirk. "You'll have to tell me after class, then. In my room."

Gwen Stacy

Cecil Gershwin Palmer

Barry Ween

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Sex, Dating and Self-Confidence [Tuesday, Period 2]

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Discussion: why do these lists exist? [09/09]

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