fandomhigh | Everything’s A Weapon, Wednesday, Period 1

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weaponry

Everything’s A Weapon, Wednesday, Period 1

Ugh. It was too goddamned early in the morning for this class, wasn't it? Not that Reno was complaining any. He had a coffee in hand and he'd set up the Danger Shop to look like an old favorite scenario of his from a class that he'd co-taught once before, with Cindy.

Yeah, it was the old toy store program, with a rack of teddy bears just inside the doors. A little farther in was a display of pogo sticks. The amount of toys within was practically staggering, really. Reno had not picked a small toy store by any means. But, before anyone could get too attached to the idea that they might be in the wrong class, Reno was raising his coffee in greeting and finally speaking up.

"If you're here looking to learn how to beat on shit with unusual improvised weapons, yes, you're all in the right place, rookies. Welcome to 'Everything's a Weapon,' yo." See? Now people could be totally confident that this wasn't some huge mistake, right? "Yeah, this is that class where you all get tossed at whatever scenario I can come up with, and then I throw an enemy at you, and then you beat it off or at least keep it from killing you using only your wits and whatever you can find in the setting provided, yo. Why? Because sometimes all hell breaks loose, and you don't conveniently already have the tools you need in order to survive. This class is less about killing shit, and more about working on your improvisation skills."

A beat.

"And your flexibility. Maybe your teamwork. And yeah, your ability to beat things senseless with whatever you can grab, yo. It's a multi-purpose class."

Happy you were taking it, yet?

"A few ground rules for this class I'm gonna lay out here and now. First one is, no bringing outside weapons into these workshops. For one, they won't have Danger Shop protocols on them the same way the stuff in here will. You hurt yourself or a classmate because you decided to cheat, I get in shit, and then I will make damn sure the rest of your life on the island is hell. You don't want to know how. Just trust me, I'm good at that sort of thing, yo." It was a good threat if you knew anything about Reno, at least. "Anyway it defeats the purpose. If you're gonna have your own weapons on you in here, why are you even in the class, right? For that matter, I'm gonna ask any of you with powers to try not to use those here, too. Once again, if you're just gonna conjure a bazooka or light these things on fire with your brain, why are you even here?"

Target practice? Tormenting your classmates? Paperwork error? Reno didn't care. His classroom, his rules.

"Today, we're gonna keep your assignments pretty simple. First, I wanna know who I'm dealing with. Name, class, previous weapon experience, and why you're here takin' this workshop, yo. And then I'm gonna set you all loose on the toy store. Find an object here you think would make a good weapon. You've got ten minutes to pick a good one. If something were to happen, remember, that's ten minutes more than you'd actually get. Make this one count, yo. Oh, and if anyone is interested in playin' Rookie for the rest of the term, I'm in the market for a TA. Come talk to me after class."

[OOC: Open Have fun!]

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You have a whole ~~moddable~~ toy store at your disposal! Run rampant, go nuts! Find what you think would be the best weapon in case you ever had to totally wing it, for whatever reason, in the middle of a toy store! You know you always wanted to play with Barrel-of-Monkey throwing stars. Don’t deny it.

It probably wasn't a surprise that Karina went first for the water guns, right? While she couldn't use her powers, a water gun wasn't that much different from an ice gun, and it was nice to have something that was familiar, just in case she needed it.

She then tracked down bubble solution to provide her with ammunition for her gun, since she wasn't sure if the simulation extended to the bathrooms, so she could get water, and wasting her time looking for them only for them to, you know, not exist seemed stupid. Besides, Karina figured the bubbles were more in the spirit of the challenge.

Once her gun was set up, she grabbed a skipping rope.

In the spirit of the challenge, she'd use the skipping rope first. The water/bubble gun was the back-up plan.

Edited 2014-07-02 12:19 (UTC)

"Hey," Kathy said, giving the other girl a small grin. "I have something better than bubble solution if you're interested."

She wasn't sure what bubble solution was supposed to do to an enemy anyway. Maybe if you got it directly in the eye?

Karina was pretty sure that getting bubble solution anywhere would be gross and sticky, but maybe that was just her and her vanity. And in the eyes, well, it'd probably hurt.

"Define 'better'," Karina said, grinning back, but being cautious ~~as I head off to bed~~. "What sort of harm does your solution do?"

A beat.

"You don't think bubbles could be a weapon of mass destruction?"

No, Karina. Probably not.

Yeah, not really. And most bubble liquid was deliberately mild because it was a favorite with little kids.

"Mine's flammable," Kathy said, proudly. "And I have a heat source to set it off."

[Night!]

Some of it came coloured these days! That had to mean something!

Karina looked doubtful. "And you're planning on burning things without even knowing what's going to attack us?"

That sort of made her uneasy, honestly.

Food coloring! It was even edible!

"No way!" Kathy cried, showing Karina her arsenal. "What if it's, like, a person?!"

You did not set people on fire. That was a personal rule of Kathy's, as well as a law.

"But if it is a person, getting a little wet and soapy isn't going to stop them, either. But showing you have a portable flame-thrower would probably make them stop and rethink attacking you."

"How was I supposed to know?" Karina retorted, visibly relieved. "Enough of the people here would set others on fire."

She surveyed Kathy's arsenal.

"I could use my soapy water to make them slip and fall," Karina invented on the spot, "Which would give people time to run. It's also a little more portable than an E-Z Bake Oven, though I'm impressed at your creativity."

"Wait, really?" Kathy looked around the class, trying to figure out who among their classmates might decide that setting people on fire was an okay thing to do.

"And thanks." She grinned at Karina's compliment. "Though, with the oven, now that the coil is hot enough, I can use it to set fire to something and then just run with that. I just needed something that could catch fire, since I don't carry a lighter or anything."

She held up her doll-clothing-baseball-bat torch. "Light this and leave the oven behind. Though I'll be sad to bail before my cake is done."

Look, when life handed you an E-Z Bake Oven you baked with it, even if you also used it to start fires. To do anything else would be a waste!

[And now I'm off to bed!]

Since the projectile weapons seemed limited to the non-lethal variety and Barry wouldn't have his normal tools to upgrade them, Barry went with a pair of wooden toy hockey sticks.

Jalian held out one of her finds to Barry: a chemistry kit. "I found this. I work with mechanics, not chemicals. Is it helpful?"

Barry took the kit and looked it over. "Nothing specific here that would be too damaging. They usually don't pack anything fun in these kinds of kits."

Keep in mind that Barry's idea of fun with chemistry included radioactive isotopes.

Jalian eyed it with disappointment. "What is it supposed to teach if there's nothing dangerous?"

Hey, radioactive isotopes were pretty! ...also dangerous, fine.

Four thought that the bicycle tire pumps would make a pretty good weapon, so he grabbed that and a huge box of Legos, just in case someone was trying to sneak up on him. Stepping on those, even in shoes, hurt.

Jalian took a few minutes just to look over the unfamiliar things. Most of them seemed fairly flimsy, unfortunately. She found a ~~baseball bat~~ sturdy metal club, though, and some ~~darts~~ odd but sharp projectiles.

On her way back to the others, she spotted something else, and grabbed two of the boxes.

Eleanor was in an aisle with an excess of pink -- apparently, this was intended for young girls. So be it.

She found a tiny guitar (http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=4082048&cp=2255956.2262937.4043072.3703682&parentPage=family) with what appeared to be princesses painted on. It would work as a blunt object; one good thwack would splinter the wood, presumably, but some of those edges might be nicely sharp. If all else failed, one could use the guitar strings as garrotes.

Kaylin grabbed a bunch of whatever the hell Yo-Yos were, a pogo stick, and a metal slinky, which she straightened out into bigger loops of a makeshift garrote.

Kathy didn't have a lot of weapons training, but she did have an imagination. And the speed to make a lot of things happen in ten minutes. The first thing she went for were the gymnastics ribbons because she had the most experience with those. Sadly, the ones here were flimsy and light, which meant that after one attempt to fling one, she was setting it aside with a disgusted sigh.

Which just meant more to improvise, she guessed.

At the end of ten minutes, Kathy was loaded for bear. A stuffed animal net was fastened to her hip, filled with regulation-sized pool balls. A pool cue was being carried in her off-hand, and a bola made from three X-box controllers was slung around her neck. Next to her were a handful of lawn darts--hadn't those been recalled back in, like, the 80s?--and she had cracked open several yo-yo water balls and was dipping the ends of 'torches' (baseball bats with doll clothes wrapped around the end) into the liquid. She remembered her mom finding out that the yo-yos weren't filled with water, but flammable diesel hydrocarbons.

Which was why there was an E-Z Bale Oven plugged in behind her, merrily baking a mini-cake and providing a source of heat for if an ignition source was needed.

She might have been whistling while she worked.

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Everything’s A Weapon, Wednesday, Period 1

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