fandomhigh | Practical Philosophy, Monday

Entry tags:

practical philosophy

Practical Philosophy, Monday

Last night, an automated message had gone out to everyone - by computer for those who could use one, and by printed, mailed note to those who couldn't - telling them to meet in a classroom instead of on the dorms this time.

It would swiftly become clear why, as a komodo dragon entered the room with a kitten sitting on his head. A few moments later, a nexu followed, grinning his intensely unsettling grin at the class. The nexu sat down in the corner and immediately began grooming his own behind.

The kitten hopped up on the desk and batted at the computer keyboard lying on top of it.

A projector beamed Ender's image onto the wall behind the circus.

"If you're seeing this," said Ender in the video, "I'm currently transformed into something else, most likely a komodo dragon - a large lizard - though it's entirely possible the island has come up with something else for me. My teaching assistant and my partner will also have been inconvenienced, or one of them would be the one teaching you today."

The Ender in the video smiled faintly.

"I think this is an excellent time to discuss the ethics of transformation," he said. "Learning experience? Drastic betrayal of consent by an omniscient island entity? An unfortunate consequence of living on this island, much like floods and earthquakes are elsewhere? Has it happened to you, or are you afraid it will, and what measures have you taken to cope with it? Are you considering taking some now?"

There was a short pause.

"I'll be attempting to communicate with you through a translator, who will digitally print my answers on this very screen," he said. "I hope that she will remain true to the actual meaning of my words and not play tricks on you, but be forewarned there is someone else paying some attention right now. She won't betray anything said in this room to anyone outside of it, mind, but I felt full disclosure was important here."

The projector clicked off.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Like your professor is currently a very large killer lizard.

It's... different.

And yet somehow Ender has managed to drop sandwiches on a table near the front anyway.

To each other. Or to the lizard, who will communicate to you via projected text on the back wall.

~~Jane~~ The future is marvelous.

One's... a large cat thing with very big teeth and also sharp pointy bits on his back.

The other's a komodo dragon wearing a Bluetooth earpiece.

I present today's guest speaker slash technological tool:

Edited 2014-06-02 09:10 (UTC)

Barry Ween

"Okay. Well it hasn't happened to me," Barry admitted after the initial shock wore off. "Though my friend did once turn into a dinosaur when he didn't fucking listen to me and drank some mutagenic material I was working. He thought it was an artificial sweetner I was developing. I had to go to his house and find some original DNA in order to clone him a new body."

He gave the teachers and the TA a look. "Unlike you guys he could still talk. And had his original hair."

He shrugged.

"Let me know if you guys get stuck that way and I'll clone you some new bodies."

NO, WE'RE OKAY, read the projecter.

Underneath, in smaller font: (they're boring)

Kira Yukimura

"I totally feel like I should be taking some measure to prepare for this, since it's apparently something common," Kira said, looking a little nervous. "I guess how I feel about it would depend on what kind of animal I turned into. Is it the same one every time? Like, maybe some sort of spirit thing?"

Celia Bowen

Anders

Usually, it is. But there are always variations. Ben and I have always turned into these particular animals, though.

And underneath, smaller font:

It suits them!

Eleanor Lamb (with bear-shaped Elsa in tow)

Well. That at least answered some of Eleanor's questions, as to the nature of Elsa's transformation.

Elsa herself didn't seem all that concerned, as she snuggled into Eleanor's lap with a yawn.

"I suppose this is an excellent time for this lecture," Eleanor said, gesturing to the tiny polar bear cub cuddled onto her lap. "Behold, Elsa. We were about to walk downtown for ice cream when she transformed thus. I've taken it upon myself to watch out for her."

The tiny cub yawned, and Eleanor laughed, fondly. "She's usually more playful," she said. "But whenever it's naptime she's right back to my lap."

Eleanor was seriously growing enamored of this having-a-pet thing.

Edited 2014-06-03 01:30 (UTC)

Joker Moreau

Joker's gaze went back and forth from the creatures at the front of the class to the bear on Eleanor's lap. He leaned in close, so he could ask out of the corner of his mouth, "coincidental new pet, or is this an epidemic?"

"I don't think I'd pick a polar bear," Eleanor said lightly. "Elsa will be so disappointed that you don't recognize her. Say hello, Elsa."

It was hard to describe the noise Elsa made, in response. Something of a growl crossed with a honk, with a trill of her tongue. Indescribable, but hugely, amazingly adorable. Just like the big dark eyes that were now staring up at Joker like maybe, just maybe, he had fishies.

"Ohhhh, I am so going to break my legs if that happens to me," Joker moaned, with a wry chuckle. "No braces, no crutches -- I am going to be screwed."

"Well, hello, Elsa," Joker cooed, reaching out a hand to scritch her head. "I'll bet Eleanor's been taking good care of you."

He gave Eleanor a grin. "She's even more adorable than usual."

"Isn't she?" Eleanor laughed. "You should see when she's more awake. Class is interrupting her nap time today, or else I imagine she'd be running excited laps around here."

Elsa for her part was growl-honking excitedly at Joker's hand. Hands! Hands were great!!! Hands should always be petting her. That was where they belonged. She nuzzled happily into his palm, fully willing to do the petting herself if need be.

"Animal-you might not have the same genetic condition," Eleanor suggested.

Joker burst out laughing and petted Elsa more. "That sounds amazing. 'Course, now's probably not the best time for that. I dunno what that thing in the corner is, but nothing good can come of small fuzzy creatures scampering in front of it."

"You have a white bear in your lap," Celia greeted Eleanor, eyeing the bear curiously.

Given today's class topic, she was a bit more interested even than she'd already be.

"Maybe not," Joker conceded. "Which would be both kind of cool and kind of hash. Or maybe the island will just give me tiny little leg braces. You never know." He suddenly snickered. "Or maybe it'll make me a cuttlefish!"

"If any of those creatures try anything, I'll set them on fire," Eleanor said firmly.

What? She totally could. No eating the Elsa-bear.

"I have temporary custody of her," Eleanor explained. "At least, I've asserted temporary custody, and no one has challenged me. Would you be surprised to learn that you and this bear are acquainted?"

"Not the kitten," Joker insisted. "That's a good way to insta-fail the course."

"Maybe you get to star on Octo ER," Eleanor laughed. "See if you can get the blue-ringed octopus to take you back, after all of that cheating."

"Do you know who the kitten is, usually?" Eleanor asked. "I'd never set a kitten on fire. I meant more the ... odd ... thing with all of those teeth."

"Less surprised than usual," Celia said, glancing towards the creatures leading their class. She glanced back at the polar bear, then at Eleanor, then at the students present. "...it's not -- she's not Elsa, is she?"

The Elsa-bear appeared to know her name; she glanced up at Celia with her dark beady eyes and ... made that adorable honk-growl noise again. Celia ought to be petting her! Why wasn't Celia petting her?

Eleanor scritched under Elsa's chin. "Very good guess," she said. "She's far more affectionate than I had anticipated, in this shape."

Perhaps because it was safe.

Oh, don't worry. Celia would happily commence with the petting. "Of course she is," she said with a small smile, glancing at Eleanor. For the obvious reason, yes, but also -- "Look how darling she is! How could she not be affectionate?"

Celia was verging on using baby voices, here. She would deny it later.

Joker fluttered his eyelashes at her. "Well, it's not really cheating if it's just cuttling..."

"Well, he... recording-him, I mean... said 'TA' and 'partner', right?" Joker mused. "Do you think 'partner' means boyfriend?" He gave a shrug. "Balance of probability, I'd say the alien death-ocelot is Cade."

Vider Bearskin

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Practical Philosophy, Monday

Sign In!

Listen to the Lecture

Talk.

Talk to the TA & Teacher ...

OOC

Re: Sign In!

Re: Talk.

Re: Talk.

Re: Sign In!

Re: Talk.

Re: Sign In!

Re: Sign In!

Re: Talk.

Re: Sign In!

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Talk.

Re: Sign In!

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Talk.

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Talk.

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Talk.

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Talk.

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Talk.

Re: Listen to the Lecture

Re: Sign In!