fandomhigh | Science You Cannot Possibly Comprehend, Monday, Period 5

Hey, kids! It's a very Doom Final!

"I have taught you much this semester. Perhaps you have learned something from my lessons. Perhaps not. We shall see," Doom said. "Your task for this final is to invent something. This will be yours regardless of what it is, be it a weapon, a teleportation device, or anything else you can imagine and build within an hour."

"You will have the full hour to design and build your invention, minus this introduction. At the end of the period, you will bring your invention to the front of the lab, where we will be temporarily transported one hour into the past in a secure location to test your inventions. This should only take a few minutes for each invention, after which you will be brought back to this lab, seconds after you left. This serves not only to maximize your time, but also as a reminder that I brought mechanical time travel to my world."

"Any parts you may need are in the middle of the lab. Use your consoles for any help you may need. You will be graded on your invention's creativity and effectiveness. For this examination, I care little for aesthetics."

"Begin."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Evilly!

Topher Brink

Jim Kirk

Raven Darkholme

Cecil Palmer

Billy Kaplan

Well, more instructions and bravado this time.

You only have about 57 minutes to invent and build some sort of device, so get to work!

There were a lot of invention ideas that Topher thought he could tackle today, but the time limit and, more importantly, the objective of the assignment - to impress Doom, obviously - had him leaning toward the more sycophantic end of the spectrum.

He worked quickly and efficiently, shielding his work from his classmates' probably-not-prying eyes with his free arm. Like anyone was going to steal this idea.

Jim was still pretty tired so he wasn't really in the best frame of mind to go about inventing something today.

But, after this past week, Jim had some ideas for building weapons so he started on some sort of gun.

Cecil thought hard and looked up a lot of things and then set about putting a lot of things together.

At the end of the hour, come to the front of the room, where you will be transported to Doom's lab under the duck pond an hour ago so you can demonstrate your invention away from your slightly younger self's eyes.

Explain what the invention is and then show off if it works. If you'd like, explain to Doom why it's so great that you should get a better grade.

Once you demonstrate the invention, you're free to leave with your invention. You will be returned to the lab a couple minutes after the end of the class period.

"I made the world's first flare gun slash acid stamp gun slash threatener," Topher announced, hoisting the unnecessarily large rocket-launcher-shaped device into his arms to the best of his ability -- it was really heavy. "As you can see, it's very cool looking and resembles a functional weapon, and there are several triggers right here. I can do this--"

He pulled the first and largest trigger, aiming the flare gun up at the sky with only a moderate amount of difficulty, and a flare shaped not unlike Doom's face appeared in the air.

"--or this--"

Another trigger, this time with the weapon aimed at the ground, and a similar stamp appeared on the ground in bright acid, this time with the words DOOM WAS HERE just below the illustration of Doom's face.

"-- or this."

He pulled the third and final trigger, and the gun played a prerecorded message, announcing "Dooooooooooom" in Topher's nasaly voice.

"You can program it to say anything instead of that, but I'm sure you're way better at sounding badass than I am," Topher assured his wise and menacing, and did he mention wise, teacher. "So, in conclusion, as you can see, it's amazing. Will you write me a letter of recommendation in addition to the A?"

"It will be taken into consideration," Doom said. He looked roughly as pleased as he could considering that you could only kind of see his eyes, and his body language never suggested anything beyond 'fear me' or perhaps 'accursed Richards!' "Send me an e-mail to remind me."

vvondoom@fandomhigh.net, everyone. Not vavavadoom@gmail.com. That was one of Johnny Storm's little jokes.

Cecil beamed and held up his shiny-looking...thing. It looked sort of like a camera with extra bits grafted on.

"It tests if things exist! It'll look at them, and listen to them, and poke them, and sniff them. I wasn't sure how to make it taste things, but it should still be mostly accurate, right?"

Doom held a hand out, projecting a holographic image of another Doom. "Demonstrate. But bear in mind that you will have a long way to go to convince me that you are not wasting my time."

Cecil fiddled with a button and a long, skinny bit jumped out of his invention and jabbed at the hologram. It went right through it, and the invention's screen lit up with a sign saying DOES NOT EXIST.

Cecil grinned.

"Now demonstrate on something that does exist," Doom said. "But if you choose to demonstrate on me, you will fail and serve detention on Saturday."

Well, that hardly seemed fair. It wasn't like it hurt to be tested. But still, Cecil did have a job on Saturdays.

He pointed his invention at the wall. It (the invention) flashed and stuck out its...sticky-out thing...and then the screen lit up: DOES SEEM TO EXIST.

"Seem to exist? It can't be more certain?" Doom inquired.

"Well, how certain can we ever be of anything, really?" Cecil asked. "I didn't want it to overstate the possibility. It's as real as the machine is, anyway!"

"You invented something less useful than your own senses," Doom concluded. "But it is an invention and it does work. Now remove it from my sight."

Hmph. Well, Cecil bet it would be really useful to ♥Carlos♥. He could test the house that didn't exist and make sure it didn't! He could reassure the angels! Or not.

"Sure!" Cecil shoved it in his backpack. It promptly told him his backpack existed, which was good to know. "And I just wanted to say thanks! You're probably not the best teacher, but I did learn science! a little. And you didn't kill anyone, which is really decent of you."

Whose invention had best not be a trick.

For the last time!

Doom's last class unless I ever app him again! He's been a blast! Thanks, everyone!

Science You Cannot Possibly Comprehend, Monday, Period 5

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