Kaidan Alenko (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
not_a_whiner) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2013-12-06 12:13 pm
not_a_whiner) wrote in fandomhigh2013-12-06 12:13 pm
Entry tags:
Space!, Friday
Was Kaidan looking more uncomfortable than usual today? Yes, yes he was.
"Hey," he told the class. "I've been informed that I should probably cover--" He coughed. "...Interspecies relations with you. In case that, uh. Comes up."
Shuffle.
"There are risks involved with, uh, associating intimately with someone of another sentient species," he said. "For example, if you're a levo-amino lifeform and you have relations with a dextro-amino person, both of you are at risk of having allergic reactions to your, uh." Damn it. "...Fluids."
Nghghghgh. He was just... Going to try and get through this.
"Some species secrete substances that might serve as hallucinogenics," he continued on doggedly. "They might have oddly shaped genitals or specific mating rituals that need to be observed. But... most of the time, at least... you can bet there won't be a risk of pregnancy." A pause. "Unless you're sleeping with an asari. They can, ah. Get along. With anybody. Though the offspring is always asari."
He rubbed the back of his neck.
"Basically, make sure to be informed about the details of the reproductive habits of your heterospecies relationship," he said, rubbing harder at the back of his neck. "And no, pornography is not a good substitute. Talk to a doctor. Or a professor. A professional." Probably not a Systems Alliance marine.
He fell silent for a long moment.
"Okay," he said. "I'm going to make you all play an informative game about interspecies relationships. Team up, two to a screen, let's go."
And stop talking about this. Right now.
"Hey," he told the class. "I've been informed that I should probably cover--" He coughed. "...Interspecies relations with you. In case that, uh. Comes up."
Shuffle.
"There are risks involved with, uh, associating intimately with someone of another sentient species," he said. "For example, if you're a levo-amino lifeform and you have relations with a dextro-amino person, both of you are at risk of having allergic reactions to your, uh." Damn it. "...Fluids."
Nghghghgh. He was just... Going to try and get through this.
"Some species secrete substances that might serve as hallucinogenics," he continued on doggedly. "They might have oddly shaped genitals or specific mating rituals that need to be observed. But... most of the time, at least... you can bet there won't be a risk of pregnancy." A pause. "Unless you're sleeping with an asari. They can, ah. Get along. With anybody. Though the offspring is always asari."
He rubbed the back of his neck.
"Basically, make sure to be informed about the details of the reproductive habits of your heterospecies relationship," he said, rubbing harder at the back of his neck. "And no, pornography is not a good substitute. Talk to a doctor. Or a professor. A professional." Probably not a Systems Alliance marine.
He fell silent for a long moment.
"Okay," he said. "I'm going to make you all play an informative game about interspecies relationships. Team up, two to a screen, let's go."
And stop talking about this. Right now.
Re: Team Up and Play The Game!
Re: Team Up and Play The Game!